Weird combinations

[Boozy]

Guy comes into the store last night and throws all his items on the counter, telling me that he's in a hurry.

His purchase:
Fully-cooked roast chicken
Bottle of red wine
Econo-sized box of condoms
Two pairs pantyhose
Disposable camera

I ring him through for the wine, send him to the grocery check-out for the rest. A Simpson's quote springs to mind: "I don't know what you have planned for tonight, but I don't want any part of it."
So I thought I'd post it here, because I just know there are some more stories about bizarre combinations out there. Who's got one?

[Becks]

I don't recall any weird combos, but I'm guessing he had a date, or...he's into self-gratifacation.

[doofusmongerbeep]

Not so much a weird combo as a gross one.

Really old dirty guy dressed in overalls comes to my register with a large can of vaseline and some condoms.

[OfficeSlug]

One of my favorite topics!

Combos like Vagasil and whipped cream cans can make me go, HRM?!

[Lace Neil Singer]

Analeze, strawberry syrup and full cream milk. O__o

[Tria]

Not so much a weird combo as a gross one.

Really old dirty guy dressed in overalls comes to my register with a large can of vaseline and some condoms.

What a moron.... That'll kill a condom quicker than a shotgun.

[Lace Neil Singer]

Yeah, doesn't he know that vaseline rots condoms and you're meant to use KY?

Ah, the useless and useful facts I know. XD

[AFpheonix]

Most people bring their condom purchases back to me so they don't have to parade up front with them.
Lessee....Plan B, and rather than get condoms for the next time, they were trying to see if the pharmacist would endorse that spermicide vaginal film instead. Hmm....guess I'd better stock up on Plan B with these guys in the neighborhood....

Little old man with a box of Magnums, KY warming fluid and some other flavored stuff

I have yet to have anyone buy that Mandelay stuff though. Good thing, it cracks me up everytime I see it on the shelf.

[Azalea]

My ex fiance and I once bought condoms, KY and ice cream together. You should've seen the looks we got...

[I See Stupid People]

We openers found a drug store receipt in the back booth the other day (DT fast food). It was for a large bottle of Budwiser and a home pregnancy test!

Who was taking the test? One of our night employees, which are largely HS kids? Did a customer hand in the receipt with their payment? Who gets the beer? The maybe-mom-to-be, or the dad-to-be (honey, here's a Bud... and oh by the way...)

[Reyneth]

At a bookstore, Playboy and Playgirl at the same time - from a little o'le senior citizen. yikes!

[Spiffy McMoron]

Econo-sized box of condoms
Two pairs pantyhose
Disposable camera

OK, that guy is either hopeful or delusional.

[doofusmongerbeep]

What a moron.... That'll kill a condom quicker than a shotgun.

I know - but I just couldn't get up the courage to tell the guy. He looked kinda grumpy, and as if I would've said something he would've told me off. Whatever man. Just buy your stuff and go on your way...

[Dreamstalker]

Lessee....Plan B, and rather than get condoms for the next time, they were trying to see if the pharmacist would endorse that spermicide vaginal film instead.

That's nuts (does that crap actually work? seems like a dicey thing to me...)

I have yet to have anyone buy that Mandelay stuff though. Good thing, it cracks me up everytime I see it on the shelf.

That's basically some derivative of novocaine, IIRC *wonders who would use that stuff*

[symposes]

I remember hearing on Bob and Tom, this guy was an inspector, and he used an ultra sound machine to inspect the insides of walls in buildings, i assume, concrete, and air pockets, etc.

His machine ran on D batteries, and he was able to use KY lube with it... (i dont understand how this process works, but whatever.)

He ran out of batteries one day, so he stopped at a local grocery and bought about 10 packs of them. And just happened to notice the KY was on sale. so he figured why not, it keeps. So he bought a bunch of it.

As the clerk was ringing him out, he said the clerk had this look of "wtf?!"