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  • #1

    Random Flea Market Nonsense

    - Yes, you have caught us keeping an eye on you, sir. Good going. Shows a remarkable grasp of reality that other customers do not often grasp. However, throwing a tizzy and marking off in a huff (it was purple with shiny red highlights) just makes us think it was a good thing to keep an eye on you. After all, if you were guilty, go to hell and if you were innocent, why protest so much?

    - Stop arguing with me. I am the vendor here, I know what row we are in. Fine, if you want to tell your friends the wrong row number, go right ahead. Bonus; you are telling them the longest row in the market, the one that is four times as long as any other row.

    - Mean customers don't get offers of bags.

    - I have to admit, I have some comic book price guides to sell -just- to see what kind of silliness customers will pull over them. The last one really tricked me and got the information for free. I do admit her hotness helped the trickery.

    - No, I will not buy your cards. Why then do you persist in telling me what cards you have? It is a mystery.

    - Customer: "I really want Harry Potter One. Do you have it? I must own it."
    Me: "No, but it is north of here. Keep going that way. You can't miss the books."
    Customer: ::goes South::
    My brain: Fuck it. I hate the world. Buy me a Midori Sour.

    OR...bear with me, dear readers.

    - Customer: "I really want Harry Potter One. Do you have it? I must own it."
    Me: "I have it right here, for one dollar."
    Customer: "That's too much." or "No, thanks."
    Brain: What, I don't even.

    OR....

    Customer: "Would you take fifty cents for it?"
    Brain: Look, surely we can get away with killing one of them.
    Tags: None
  • #2
    Quoth Lots42 View Post
    OR...bear with me, dear readers.

    - Customer: "I really want Harry Potter One. Do you have it? I must own it."
    Me: "I have it right here, for one dollar."
    Customer: "That's too much." or "No, thanks."
    Brain: What, I don't even.
    Y'know that sound that a whoopee cushion makes when it deflates? My brain made this sound as I read this one. Who in their right mind *wouldn't* buy up every book they could if they were for a dollar?? I have some books right now that I reallyreally want that if I could get them for even $5, I'd do it.
    "Things that fail to kill me make me level up." ~ NateWantsToBattle, Training Hard (Counting Stars parody)

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    • #3
      Quoth firecat88 View Post
      Who in their right mind *wouldn't* buy up every book they could if they were for a dollar??
      I wouldn't. People look at you really oddly when you walk away from the United Way book sale with 50 books. I've rather decided to not do that again, even if I did magically have another wall to fill with books.

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      • #4
        Quoth Magpie View Post
        I wouldn't. People look at you really oddly when you walk away from the United Way book sale with 50 books. I've rather decided to not do that again, even if I did magically have another wall to fill with books.
        Let 'em look!

        I used to leave the library, on my bike, with between 15 and 40 books to read over the next month. I'd go in with plastic bags to hang from my handlebars for the trip home.

        ^-.-^
        Faith is about what you do. It's about aspiring to be better and nobler and kinder than you are. It's about making sacrifices for the good of others. - Dresden

        Comment

        • #5
          Quoth Lots42 View Post
          - Customer: "I really want Harry Potter One. Do you have it? I must own it."
          Me: "I have it right here, for one dollar."
          Customer: "That's too much." or "No, thanks."
          I'LL TAKE IT! Come on, it's a BUCK!

          Wait, hardback or paperback? Trying to keep from getting overloaded with hardbacks again.
          Now a member of that alien race called Management.

          Yeah, you see that right. Pink. Harness.

          Comment

          • #6
            Quoth Andara Bledin View Post
            I used to leave the library, on my bike, with between 15 and 40 books to read over the next month. I'd go in with plastic bags to hang from my handlebars for the trip home.
            Library's different. It's when you're buying them that it's awkward. I still have my mom's "no more than 8 books" rule burned in my brain, so I tend to not get a lot of books. I've managed to get down to one library trip a week, even with that limit though.

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            • #7
              Quoth Andara Bledin View Post
              Let 'em look!

              I used to leave the library, on my bike, with between 15 and 40 books to read over the next month. I'd go in with plastic bags to hang from my handlebars for the trip home.
              I'd've done that as a kid, except that the Brooklyn Public Library had a rule: no more than 6 hardcovers and 6 paperbacks at a time. I hardly ever went home with fewer than 12 books, though.

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              • #8
                Quoth Lots42 View Post
                - Mean customers don't get offers of bags.
                There's just something about this that just...*sniffle*
                A lion however, will only devour your corpse, whereas an SC is not sated until they have destroyed your soul. (Quote per infinitemonkies)

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                • #9
                  Quoth Shalom View Post
                  I'd've done that as a kid, except that the Brooklyn Public Library had a rule: no more than 6 hardcovers and 6 paperbacks at a time. I hardly ever went home with fewer than 12 books, though.
                  The library for Orange County at the time had a 50-book limit at the time. With a 30-day checkout policy. I always wondered who could possibly check out, read, and return 50 books in a one-month period.

                  On my more ambitious hauls, I'd often return several books unread, or late.

                  I buy books the same way. If I find cheap books that I have a good idea that I'll read, I'll grab them all. After all, if I decide I don't want to keep them, I can hand them on or donate them to someone.

                  ^-.-^
                  Faith is about what you do. It's about aspiring to be better and nobler and kinder than you are. It's about making sacrifices for the good of others. - Dresden

                  Comment

                  • #10
                    Quoth Andara Bledin View Post
                    . I always wondered who could possibly check out, read, and return 50 books in a one-month period.
                    ^-.-^
                    *raises hand*

                    I can read about 5 books a day in my free time while working full time and raising monsters, I mean kids. (ok I admit to having slowed down, 15 years ago I read 8-10 books a day - yes I do read every work, no I don't know how to speed read.)
                    sadly I remember books I read 20+ years ago. I recently found a copy of magnificat, by that priest. great book about a cat who goes to heaven and how he became a maximum saint.
                    It's sad because too much of modern writing is excrement. suitable only for burning if your power is out and you have a fireplace. sigh

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                    • #11
                      I wish I could still consider myself a "voracious" reader, tho I've never done better than 2 novels or so in one day. My record stands at LoTR (British 2nd ed) in 3 days...That's the best I can do.

                      Lots42: I should like to hear more from this Brain person. I like the cut of his jib
                      "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
                      "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
                      "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
                      "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
                      "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
                      "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
                      Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
                      "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

                      Comment

                      • #12
                        I remember buying the Harry Potter books and reading them within hours of purchase- at or around 2am. XD I'd finish around 3am for the shorter books, the 7th book (what is it, 700 pages?) took me almost 4 hours I think. I kept stopping and freaking out.

                        However, over the years my book collection seems to have gotten smaller... often boxes of books were put in the garage (my room is too small to hold them) and they'd get soaked or full of bugs and eaten.

                        ...-cry-

                        Modern writing IS pretty trashy. I'm picky.

                        Comment

                        • #13
                          Quoth Teskeria View Post
                          It's sad because too much of modern writing is excrement. suitable only for burning if your power is out and you have a fireplace. sigh
                          A lot of the older stuff was too. Part of why all the old books you can get are good is that they're the only ones we keep.

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                          • #14
                            Quoth Magpie View Post
                            A lot of the older stuff was too. Part of why all the old books you can get are good is that they're the only ones we keep.
                            There's no greater percentage of crap, it's just that distribution has gotten so easy, we're exposed to a much higher percentage of all of it. Especially since it was only the best that would gain wide-spread notice, and now anything can do so.

                            ^-.-^
                            Faith is about what you do. It's about aspiring to be better and nobler and kinder than you are. It's about making sacrifices for the good of others. - Dresden

                            Comment

                            • #15
                              See the only bad part about being able to read quickly is that you finish beloved stories quickly and then have to make sad pained noises when you are done and the new one is not out yet.

                              It does not help that Jim Butcher actually laughs at the suffering of his readers, but that is neither here nor there

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