What now?

[Tithera]

Had a guy actually hit on me in the mall, with my boyfriend not even 3 feet from me. I of course pointed my boyfriend out and said I was already taken.
"Well, you know, you could cheat on him once or twice. I mean, I'm so much hotter than he is."
Let's see, wannabe gangsta with dirty greasy hair and obvious body odor vs amazing handsome foreign guy who treats me like a freaking queen. Damn, that's a hard choice......not.
"I don't think so. Please go away." When he wouldn't go away, boyfriend sneaks up behind him, scares the piss out of him and/or threatens bodily harm if he don't step away.
Boyfriend actually wanted to do the fake engagement ring thing, but I decided against since my family and friends would start asking questions and I just don't feel like explaining it over and over again to every single one of them.

[Andara Bledin]

Boyfriend actually wanted to do the fake engagement ring thing, but I decided against since my family and friends would start asking questions and I just don't feel like explaining it over and over again to every single one of them.

Go with a promise ring, then. Not as serious as an engagement ring, but you can lie about it to strangers who won't take no for an answer.

However, rings don't always work. Particularly when you can hear the ocean while standing next to the dude in question.

I was engaged for just a couple months when a really hot surfer dude at a crafts show started hitting on me while I was at the booth with my mother and aunt. I tried to let him down without actually turning him down, but nothing I did would clue him in to the fact that I wasn't going to say yes.

Looking back, I know that I couldn't have stood even one date with a guy that phenomenally clueless.

^-.-^

[RecoveringKinkoid]

You don't need fake rings and you don't need to lie to strangers who "won't take no for an answer."

Because you don't owe anyone any kind of explanation. And yes they WILL take "no" for an answer.

[Cazzi]

I used to use ICQ a lot and would chat with pretty much anyone. There were a couple of countries that if the person who was chatting with me was from that country, they'd be asking me about what I was wearing and stuff like that within 5 messages.

I think I know what countries you mean!
My record

Guy: Hi
Me: err, Hi
Guy: I love you and want to marry you
Me: Delete & block!

Sadly, that wasn't the only one from that country.. but was the fastest proposal

Then friends wondered why all my security setting on there & other messengers got maxed out... it got annoying

[RecoveringKinkoid]

What bugs me about the whole "I have a boyfriend" ruse is that you should not need an acceptable excuse to blow off unwanted overtures. When you do that, you give the impression that you are unable to speak for yourself. Or that if you didn't have a boyfriend, you might be open to his attention.

[Athaelia]

I agree with Kinkoid here. I have told men before "I have a boyfriend, etc." and they'd STILL bug me. You know why? They don't CARE if you are attached, they are only thinking about their personal agendas, such as getting laid.

Through the years, I've learned all the fake rings, excuses, etc. will get you nowhere. Start by stating that you are not interested, and you won't be listening to his propositions.

I know that many guys may not even listen to THAT, but if someone is being persistent you really don't have to be 'polite' anymore: reaffirm you are not interested, and he has NO chance with you whatsoever.

You don't owe some sleazy guy an explanation; your life is none of his freakin' buisness! And for gosh's sake, if someone is making you really uncomfortable, get a manager!

[Pagan]

You don't need fake rings and you don't need to lie to strangers who "won't take no for an answer."

Because you don't owe anyone any kind of explanation. And yes they WILL take "no" for an answer.

I was gonna say. My answer to any and all of the questions in the OP, beyond those about the merchandise, would have been, "no".

What bugs me about the whole "I have a boyfriend" ruse is that you should not need an acceptable excuse to blow off unwanted overtures. When you do that, you give the impression that you are unable to speak for yourself. Or that if you didn't have a boyfriend, you might be open to his attention.

Exactly. Shouldn't need anything else except telling them you're not interested. And if the persist, well, pointy objects are good.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

I suspecet "I have a boyfriend"works about as well on skeevy men as signs that say "no soliciting" works on door to door salesmen.

It gives the impression that you are not strong willed enough to resist without help.

[XCashier]

The ring idea isn't too bad, I might look into finding a cheap one. Of course, I'm sure it doesn't stop all of them.

Last time some creepy guy hit on me, I was wearing my real wedding band. It doesn't stop some guys, though it might weed out a few.

[Seshat]

Nothing will stop some of those creepy dudes.

My best friend says "you need a big bag of No".

My advice for dealing with creeps:

Have some friends - both female and male - help you learn to say "no" in a way which totally conveys it. Develop the body language, vocal tone, and eye contact that conveys a range of "No" from the sort you can use to gently let down someone polite, to the sort that you will need to use for the most persistent creep.

Unfortunately even that will not deter *everyone* - but beyond the bluntest "no", you're talking 'get to lights and people, scream for help, call the police and use your pepper spray'.

But for the ones that aren't going to resort to violence to get what they want, use your friends to help you develop firm, unambiguous, unavoidable "no"s.

[Jangles the Moon Monkey]

In my last job, I was talking to someone who started hitting on me despite me being heavily pregnant and wearing an engagement ring. Some muppets just don't know when to stop or have a clue.

[Eireann]

Not to mention the fact that the words "I have a boyfriend (or girlfriend)" just don't work with too many people. Rather than hearing, "I'm involved", they hear, "If it weren't for my boyfriend/girlfriend, I would go for you". As said before, you don't owe anyone explanations, your personal life is none of their business, and as soon as they start asking you if you're dating someone, or how old you are, or anything that doesn't pertain to the business at hand, they're overstepping their boundaries. Don't tell them anything; finish the transaction and be done with it.