Gilbert & Sullivan & A Strap-on ( Brace yourself, kids )

[Kimmik]

SC: “Have you ever heard of the California Foot Hills Cult?

well having lived in the Foothills of California... I can say... there are some odd ducks up that way... and way to many people related...

*snickers* Cult *giggles* the only time I heard Cult used there was cultivation

[Andara Bledin]

This won't be pretty. >.>

*dons her hazmat gear*

I May Finally Have Snapped

I... I was in love with you before, but this... this is pure, unadulterated genius. <3

I shall call it Bilescath and you cannot possibly fathom just how much of it I am directing towards you right this instance.

... Wow... good thing I had my hazmat gear on... I'd hate to be in the same region as your target.

You do not yet know just how far we have sunk as a species.

I'm not certain how much consolation this might be, but we've always been there. It's just that these days, it's much easier to spot and quantify.

That’s already a mental image that’s going to keep me awake at night.

You're not the only one... >.<

Some lunatic leapt on the tracks at Broadway right after my train left, and starting running towards Main Street.

You really didn't have to name which station he came from... isn't that where the all come from?

Is that what we’ve come to? Do we need to get you a collar with a little tag on it? So rather than having to face the difficult mental hurdles of everyday life, you can just show them your collar?

For some people, no matter how many birthdays they've celebrated, their mothers should never stop pinning their information to the insides of their coats.

I was so glad my father got new orders and we moved to a more dignified street than one named after (what is my best guesstimate to be) Scooby and Velma's Love Child.

Jinkies!

Thus was born the modern myth of witches flying on broomsticks.

Fun to think of, but not the case, as AccountingDrone has pointed out.

Right. Took me all of 3 seconds to find this nonsense. Have fun, kids!

I'm not the only one here who knew the tune before the singing started, right?

^-.-^

[thatcrazyredhead]

GK, you are, as always, brilliant! I wish the people in my office were as much fun as you!

[Gravekeeper]

At least, that would be MY assumption. And as long as said nail gun-toting biker wasn't seeking ME out, I would be very happy with that assumption.

That would be my assumption if it wasn't the dead of night. >.>

But you also are wrong, my friend. There is one way that someone can immediately affect the odds, and in their favor. It's very simple: buy more tickets.

Trust me when I say they have this part covered already. Some people will buy 16-30 tickets. And these things aren't cheap. We're talking $500-600 in lottery tickets.

If I take broomstick handle "B" and insert it into my slot "V" I will get the big "O"

This is the oddest thing I have read on here in a while. ;p

You really didn't have to name which station he came from... isn't that where the all come from?

True. Though it is important for the frame of reference as to how far I had to farking walk as a result. That was a good 30 minute hike in my work clothes with a backpack. I was unimpressed to say the least by the time I got to my office. The Skytrain started running again 15 minutes after I got to work. If I had remained I'd have been painfully late instead of annoying late.

[Jester]

I'm not the only one here who knew the tune before the singing started, right?

If you meant the original Gilbert & Sullivan tune, no, you are not the only one.

If you meant the Doctor Who version, that was the first I had ever heard of it.

That would be my assumption if it wasn't the dead of night.

What, people can't do work on their houses in the dead of night? You and I are not the only night owls alive, my friend. Another possibility....he was borrowing the nail gun (or retrieving it from someone he loaned it to) and was coming from their house, having been there socially. If all you are taking is a nail gun, why NOT just carry it?

Trust me when I say they have this part covered already. Some people will buy 16-30 tickets.

And thus these people improve their odds mathematically, as I said, and contrary to what you said.

This is the oddest thing I have read on here in a while.

I cannot be the only one who is having trouble believing that, can I?

[Andara Bledin]

True. Though it is important for the frame of reference as to how far I had to farking walk as a result. That was a good 30 minute hike in my work clothes with a backpack. I was unimpressed to say the least by the time I got to my office. The Skytrain started running again 15 minutes after I got to work. If I had remained I'd have been painfully late instead of annoying late.

Ah, yes, I hadn't considered the part that Broadway is near the beginning of your nightly journey into he-... er work.

^-.-^

[Bunny the Veggie Slayer]

On reflection that was a lot more pleasurable than the last time I heard the words "strap-on" and "brace yourself" used in the the same sentence.






What?!

[thatcrazyredhead]

On reflection that was a lot more pleasurable than the last time I heard the words "strap-on" and "brace yourself" used in the the same sentence.

[marder]

I did not, however, expect the thought “Did a biker with a nail gun just walk past me?” to cross my mind. Also, the answer to the question was yes. I do not know why he had a nailgun at 11pm on the Skytrain, and I do not wish to know why for asking the question would likely get said nailgun applied to me. However, he did manage to ride all the way to Broadway without incident. So I can only assume whomever owes him money does not ride transit but does live within the vicinity of Broadway Station.

Remembers me a day I was jogging alone in the forest. From far away, I can see there is a person standing on the side of the path. As I get closer, I notice he is carrying something. As I get even closer, I realize he has a "red neck" look, is looking at me and has a huge chainsaw in his hands. It's too late to turn back, so all I can do is jog in front of him and, with my brightest smile, say "Hello". I have heard a mumbled answer, but it was completely distorted due to the Doppler effect generated by me running the fastest kilometer of my life.

[Becks]

Also, per policy, a member of our legal team should arrive at your home in the next 3-5 business days to serve you with an official notice that you are, in fact, not funny. Should you wish to dispute this, you will have 1 week to file the appropriate documents with your local city hall. At which point a formal trial will be scheduled where you may have your sense of humour, such as it is, judged by a jury of your peers. You will be given 3 sessions across 3 days to present any and all material you believe is “funny”. The province of British Columbia requires a minimum of at least 4 jurors achieving a level of laughter by which they have trouble breathing, tear up or lose momentary control of their bowels for you to maintain your status as “humourous”.

However, at any point during your allotted time a juror expresses a desire to punch you in the head or neck region, the government of Canada will automatically file a 3 year injunction against you preventing you from trying to employ “humour” until at least 2013. At which point you may file for the reinstatement of your “humourous” status.

All I need to do is change a couple small details, then I can print this out and hand it to the MOTH every time he thinks he's being funny.

Thanks, GK!

[Cazzi]

Yay, the G & S is a much better tune to have stuck in my head than the last one I got

Thanks GK