It's summer. For the record, Textbook Hell switches to summer hours since customer traffic is pretty low, except for certain points of the year. As such, we open at 8 am instead of 7:30. Ooooh, big change!! Now, 99% of the time, I open the store, meaning I need to be there roughly an hour or so before we open to set up tills, start up computers, etc. (we don't have the fastest equipment around...) When the phone rings I HAVE to answer it because it could be one of my managers wanting to check in/say they're running late, or it may be staff calling in for some reason, i.e. a lot of setup procedures occur in the back room, and I can't see the doors. staff will call to say they've arrived for their opener shift at 7:55, so I have to go let them in.
Because I have to answer the phone I have people calling me, and it's been especially bad the last few days. People calling as early as 6:50 a.m. I get here at 6:45! And it's always drastically important, life shattering urgency that requires them to call me. As in the following.
example 1
Had this gem last week.
Me: <Answering phone with opening spiel>
SC: ZOMG!!!! Why aren't you open!?!?!
Me: I'm sorry, ma'am, we open at 8.
SC: But I need a scantron! My exam starts at 8!! <Wails> Can't you open for meeeeee?!
Me: ...We open at 8...
SC: <Insert rabblerabblerantrant, hangs up in rage>
Example 2
Another gem from last week. Note, the time is 7:02.
SC: Yeah, hi, I'm in your parking lot. What time will you open?
Me: ...At 8. (Like it says on the bright freakin' neon green sign!!)
SC: Oh. Well...I need a notebook.
Me: ...
SC: Hello?
Me: Yes?
SC: I need a notebook!
Me: ...We open at 8, sir.
SC: <Huff. Hangs up>
Example 3
Ok, SERIOUSLY?!?
Me: <Picks up phone, can't even say hello>
SC: YOUR SIGN SAYS YOU OPEN AT 7:30!! IT'S 7:26 AND YOU'RE STILL CLOOOOOOSSSSSSSEEEDD!!!
Me: Er...actually our summer hours list us opening at 8...Did you need a scantron or blue book for an exam? Because there's a small shop set up on campus over by the---
SC: NONONO!! I NEED THE ATM!!!
(Note: There's an ATM in the parking lot, and one in our store.)
Me: Um....
SC: I NEED the ATM in the store so I don't get charged FEES!
Me: Ohh, well, there are other locations for that particular brand of ATM on campus, and they're located in--
SC: I WANT TO USE THE ATM!!!
Me: I apologize, ma'am, we open at 8.
SC: I'm reporting you!!! <Slams phone down>
Me: I haven't had nearly enough caffeine to deal with this...
example 4
From this morning. Which stemmed this post, actually. It's 6:58 when the phone rings.
Me: <I don't even give the opening spiel, I just say "Textbook Hell">
SC: Hi...uh...when do you open?
Me: Our summer hours have us opening at 8 am, ma'am.
SC: Oh. Well...I need a book.
Me: Unfortunately, none of my systems are up and running yet, so I can't help you.
SC: Oh. Well, can I just ask you a question?
Me: Erm. K...?
SC: Do you have <textbook>??
Me: >.< Unfortunately, none of my systems are up and running yet so I can't help you.
SC: I just need you to look up a book...
Me: ...
SC: ...
Me: ... (give it up, lady, I'm better at this than you are...)
SC: Oh. Well (See? Told ya!! I'm better!) Can't you just...look it up?
Me: No ma'am, I can't. I don't have any of my computers on, or systems active. They'll be operational when we open.
SC: Can't you just go look on the shelf?
Me: Do you know the course number, section number and professor?
SC: ...no...
Me: ...
SC: <flips the bitch switch> Oh my god, you people are SSSOOO fucking LAZY! All I'm asking is for one. Fucking. BOOK! You're a bookstore!
Me: ...we're a bookstore that's not open yet. Please feel free to call back during our scheduled hours. <I hang up on her>
>.< It's going to be a long day...I just know it!!
Because I have to answer the phone I have people calling me, and it's been especially bad the last few days. People calling as early as 6:50 a.m. I get here at 6:45! And it's always drastically important, life shattering urgency that requires them to call me. As in the following.
example 1
Had this gem last week.
Me: <Answering phone with opening spiel>
SC: ZOMG!!!! Why aren't you open!?!?!
Me: I'm sorry, ma'am, we open at 8.
SC: But I need a scantron! My exam starts at 8!! <Wails> Can't you open for meeeeee?!
Me: ...We open at 8...
SC: <Insert rabblerabblerantrant, hangs up in rage>
Example 2
Another gem from last week. Note, the time is 7:02.
SC: Yeah, hi, I'm in your parking lot. What time will you open?
Me: ...At 8. (Like it says on the bright freakin' neon green sign!!)
SC: Oh. Well...I need a notebook.
Me: ...
SC: Hello?
Me: Yes?
SC: I need a notebook!
Me: ...We open at 8, sir.
SC: <Huff. Hangs up>
Example 3
Ok, SERIOUSLY?!?
Me: <Picks up phone, can't even say hello>
SC: YOUR SIGN SAYS YOU OPEN AT 7:30!! IT'S 7:26 AND YOU'RE STILL CLOOOOOOSSSSSSSEEEDD!!!
Me: Er...actually our summer hours list us opening at 8...Did you need a scantron or blue book for an exam? Because there's a small shop set up on campus over by the---
SC: NONONO!! I NEED THE ATM!!!
(Note: There's an ATM in the parking lot, and one in our store.)
Me: Um....
SC: I NEED the ATM in the store so I don't get charged FEES!
Me: Ohh, well, there are other locations for that particular brand of ATM on campus, and they're located in--
SC: I WANT TO USE THE ATM!!!
Me: I apologize, ma'am, we open at 8.
SC: I'm reporting you!!! <Slams phone down>
Me: I haven't had nearly enough caffeine to deal with this...
example 4
From this morning. Which stemmed this post, actually. It's 6:58 when the phone rings.
Me: <I don't even give the opening spiel, I just say "Textbook Hell">
SC: Hi...uh...when do you open?
Me: Our summer hours have us opening at 8 am, ma'am.
SC: Oh. Well...I need a book.
Me: Unfortunately, none of my systems are up and running yet, so I can't help you.
SC: Oh. Well, can I just ask you a question?
Me: Erm. K...?
SC: Do you have <textbook>??
Me: >.< Unfortunately, none of my systems are up and running yet so I can't help you.
SC: I just need you to look up a book...
Me: ...
SC: ...
Me: ... (give it up, lady, I'm better at this than you are...)
SC: Oh. Well (See? Told ya!! I'm better!) Can't you just...look it up?
Me: No ma'am, I can't. I don't have any of my computers on, or systems active. They'll be operational when we open.
SC: Can't you just go look on the shelf?
Me: Do you know the course number, section number and professor?
SC: ...no...
Me: ...
SC: <flips the bitch switch> Oh my god, you people are SSSOOO fucking LAZY! All I'm asking is for one. Fucking. BOOK! You're a bookstore!
Me: ...we're a bookstore that's not open yet. Please feel free to call back during our scheduled hours. <I hang up on her>
>.< It's going to be a long day...I just know it!!
Comment