Let's talk about sprinklers.

[bhskittykatt]

Hello, it's me! You're friendly neighborhood newspaper delivery gal. Now that the warm months are here, we need to talk about sprinklers. Because here in the great Pacific Northwest, aka Land of Perpetual Rain, you feel the need to add MORE water to your lawns.

First off, people who water the street: You're not going to make it grow more pavement. All you're doing is getting me wet. Until they invent newspapers that I can throw through glass (or glass that I can throw newspapers through), I have to have my windows down. Neither me nor the dog appreciates the drive-by showers. Plus, you're just wasting water. I know the city isn't metering water yet, but it's coming in a few months, so you'd better learn to conserve now unless you want to have a coronary when you open your first metered bill.

And now, a word to my customers: I will NOT walk through your sprinklers to deliver your newspaper to your porch. Set your watering schedule to when I'm not delivering newspapers. Hint: 3am-6am is my delivery window. You'll never see me before 3am, unless it's Daylight Savings weirdness, and if you see me after 6am, it's 'cause I slept in and I thus deserve to get showered. I don't want to hear you complain that your newspaper isn't on your porch when you're running sprinklers across the whole front yard at 4am.

Finally, to the guy on the corner of 17th and Knox: How can you not see the lake in the middle of the road out there? You have a serious leak in your irrigation system, buddy. You've had it for at least a couple years, to boot. There's a pond at that intersection when we haven't had rain. Worst yet, in the winter ('cause you feel the need to water your lawn YEAR ROUND in a climate where it rains ALL THE TIME), that pond becomes ice, which makes stopping/starting/turning at that corner very treacherous. Seriously, fix it already!

[Elspeth]

fellow northwestern'er (is that a word? is now :P)

I never understood the point of watering one's lawn. It just makes the crap grow and then you have to mow it. I love that our landlord said to let the thing die (he pays our water bill).

I would rip most of it out if I owned the place.

Sorry you have to deal with the idiots. Have a cookie.

[Green_Fairy]

First off, people who water the street: You're not going to make it grow more pavement. All you're doing is getting me wet. Until they invent newspapers that I can throw through glass (or glass that I can throw newspapers through), I have to have my windows down. Neither me nor the dog appreciates the drive-by showers. Plus, you're just wasting water. I know the city isn't metering water yet, but it's coming in a few months, so you'd better learn to conserve now unless you want to have a coronary when you open your first metered bill.

i feel your pain. i walk my dog at least thrice a day and even in the middle of the day people are watering the sidewalks/streets. it's really not difficult to change the direction of the spray. plus...my poor ola's terrified of sprinklers so she damned near drags me across the street every time we pass a house watering the sidewalk.

[ravevolution]

I don't get the sprinkler/watering the lawn in the morning. It's actually better to do so after sunset

[Racket_Man]

Finally, to the guy on the corner of 17th and Knox[/B]: How can you not see the lake in the middle of the road out there? You have a serious leak in your irrigation system, buddy. You've had it for at least a couple years, to boot. There's a pond at that intersection when we haven't had rain. Worst yet, in the winter ('cause you feel the need to water your lawn YEAR ROUND in a climate where it rains ALL THE TIME), that pond becomes ice, which makes stopping/starting/turning at that corner very treacherous. Seriously, fix it already!

First thing I would do is contact the city streets dept. and make a formal complaint. if this guy is CREATING a hazardious intersection by watering his lawn in the dead of winter, maybe a visit from the city inspector might "chill" him out a little.

[MoonCat]

Oh, Elspeth, I love your signature quotes! Especially the coffee one....they won't let me make coffee at the office because mine strips paint from the walls at 30 paces....Yay for strong coffee!

Re: Sprinklers....we used to position ours so the brats next door would get wet if they came anywhere near the house....the little hellspawn would steal potted plants and stuff. We weren't subscribing to the paper then so nobody cared.