George W. Bush Is A Big Fucking Meanie! & Others.

[Magpie]

Except 'he' is not a dude -- if someone is dressing female (effectively or not) do her the courtesy of using female pronouns.

Yes, definitely. 3 of my closest friends are M2F, one who I even spent some time in a poly relationship with. A M2F presenting as female is addressed as female, please. It's part of the process to live as female before getting the surgeries and no, not everyone passes perfectly all of the time...please, do it anyway. It makes their day.

Oh, I agree that that applies for transpeople, but not everyone who cross-dresses does it because of having a non-standard gender identity. (Really not sure what a respectful way to phrase that is). Some are just men, who are prefectly happy with being men, who like to dress as women. I think that, worst case, they get flattered that they did a really convincing job of it. But dressing as female and presenting as female aren't necessarily the same.

[Seshat]

We really need respectful gender-neutral pronouns and forms of address!

zie/zir/zirs is one I've seen used. As in:

he/him/his
she/her/hers
zie/zir/zirs

[Ironclad Alibi]

How about: they/them/theirs

[arminius58]

I was debating on actually commenting, but I figured what the hey.

Here's a basic breakdown when it comes to sex/gender identities:

Drag Queens/Drag Kings/Cross Dressers: Usually do it for entertainment purposes, usually has nothing to do with sexual identity or sexual interest. So while they are in costume it is appropiate to acknowledge them as the sex they are dressed/performing as.

Transvestites: This is a sexual interest ideal, it's people who get turned on by dressing as a person of the opposite sex. As for the appropiate pronoun as above you would usually address them as the pronoun they are dressed as.

Transgender: A person who feels that they are gender identified as the wrong gender (not sex two different things). It is appropiate to identify them as the gender they identify themselves as.

Transexual: A person who feels they are the wrong sex, and will typically be looking to get the hormone therapy and/or surgery. Again, it is appropiate to identify them as the sex they are identifying with.

Now since there is no actual way for you to know the difference for any of these without getting to know the person my personal suggestion is to avoid any type of gender identification, or err on the side of caution and assume that they want to be identified as the gender/sex they are obviously more showing. And there is trans identities in a nutshell.

[Kristev]

Thank you for that clarification. Now it's so much easier to tell people what I am.

A transgender who wants to be a transsexual.

[ralerin]

*steps into the thread, cause hir life isn't hellish enough yet*

I love it when people say "hir" for some reason, and I've referred to some of the trans people who come in as such. Or She-he. Makes sense in my mind!

[Hyena Dandy]

*steps into the thread, cause hir life isn't hellish enough yet*

It isn't? *puts up plastic flames and gives you a pitchfork*

Better?