People who reflexively ask for discounts

[MadMike]

She told me she had a coupon for a free pizza, but she left it at home.

I told her the pizza was $9.65 with tax.

So why didn't you tell her you left her pizza at home?

[Becks]

I love when customers ask if they can get the employee discount. "Of course!!!!!" I cheerily reply. Why am I so cheery about it? We don't get one!!!!!!

[TonyDonuts]

So why didn't you tell her you left her pizza at home?

I like the cut of your jib.

[Jack7957]

I worked at Silo (an electronics chain long gone) one Christmas as temp holiday help. Nice thing was I got salary + commision, while the regular employees worked straight commision. Anyways, one day before closing after a long day, had a couple guys come in and were looking at the electronic keyboards. For some reason, this paticular model did not come with an AC adapter, it was sold seperatly, so you needed to either shell out another $15 for it, or buy lots of batteries. Since it was stupid to not include it in the package, they asked if we could throw it in for free. Management agreed. Then they asked for some free sheet music. Management agreed to one piece of sheet music. Then they asked for the stand. Management said no way, no deal and walked away. They looked at me and asked why they weren't getting any deal now. I told them "you got greedy". "What?" they asked, probably not believing I just said that. I repeated "you got greedy". and walked away.
Boy it was great not worrying about being fired, since I'd be gone in a couple weeks anyways.

[crazydaisy]

Ack...I hate hagglers.
The store I work for is a really low priced store anyway. The stuff isn't of hugely wonderful quality, but for the price, you can't expect really GOOD stuff.
And people still come in, and say things like 'how about giving me five pounds off this'. I think to myself, it's only eight pounds to start with you cheeky little ****.
WE have discount cards, where customers get stamps when they spend, and when they have a full card, they get money off their next buy. And these cards do have expiry dates in BIG numbers on them, but people still bring them in and try to use them. 'When I tell them, sorry but it expired two weeks ago', it really riles me when they say 'oh can't you let me have the discount anyway'.
Why yes, of course I can, cos then I'll get flak from a) my boss, b) her boss and probably c) some bod from head office, just cos you're too dim to notice the expiry date on your card.

[Becks]

I won't even begin to tell stories about the customers at Goodwill.

[BiscuitMunroe]

My old boss used to say "sure. How many are you buying" and they'd look confused and say "um....one" and my boss would then tell them that he only negotiated for purchases of more than one of the same item. It always worked well for him, but I never had much luck with it.

[decisivemoment]

I work at a camera and photofinishing store, where haggling occurs mostly when the sale is already closed.

Fortunately, camera customers are usually pretty content when I tell them that I "can't throw in a free case" simply because I can't give anything away for free (unless an ad specifically states that).

On a few occasions, cameras are behind glass models, meaning that we don't leave our cameras out like Best Buy - they are only plucked from their cases upon request or to charge their batteries - but again, I can't change the price without losing my job.

My favorite one though:

Customer arrives, I walk over to the camera counter because I love talking about cameras, even if I don't get the sale. They ask to see a Nikon D50, at the time a $600 dollar digital SLR - very nice camera. They turn out to be a VERY easy sale, I only get a chance to introduce their options when they say "we'll take it." Immediately thereafter, they mull over the lens - a 28-80, wide, but not wide enough for their tastes. They ask if they can get the 18-55 lens with the camera for the same price.

No.
They leave, go to Best Buy, where I know they were promptly rejected.

One that initially annoyed me, but I now laugh about:
A couple with a really young child arrives, looking for the same camera (D50) a couple days after Thanksgiving. They are even easier, as the guy has done his research. As soon as they say, "I'll take it" I quickly scurry over to the Nikon shelf while they fill out the expanded service plan form (woo hoo) and then realize OH $#%$# that is the display model. The guy isn't too happy about this, but accepts it anyway as my manager, happy that the camera was sold with a warranty, cleans it with microfiber cloth.

After being handed the camera again, he begins nitpicking about the lens. "Oh, I found some dust here, inside the lens." At this point, the manager is also rather annoyed - they are simply being cheap - dust, unless the lens has a crack in it, cannot get inside. The customer is actually looking at a reflection, along with generally being nitpicky because again, we can't give a discount. No.

They leave.

Three weeks later, the manager and I are recording camera serial numbers when he says, "If I tell you something, do you promise not to smack me?" I assume it's a joke and reply yes. "We actually had spare D50 lenses in stock, I just forgot about them." I tell him I'm over it than playfully fake elbow him in the side. Whatever.

[HYHYBT]

people will still ask where the elevator is even if I've manage to top my personal best and work the word "stairs" or "staircase" six times into the directions to a guest's room.

Unless you can tell them from the start that there is no elevator, I'm afraid this is one you're just going to have to live with. "The stairs are here" does not mean "there is no elevator." They don't have to throw such fits over it, though.