Man..I wanted to see that!

[Spork4pedro]

Not really a sucky customer..but funny! **WARNING! A BIT CRUDE!**

So this was back at the smoothie place during one of our slower seasons. It was just me and another CW waiting around for the lunch rush and then we get this lady (LC) and her friend (FC) calling us:

LC: "yea, um..hi! Do you guys sell smoothies?"
Me: "yup! Would you like to place an order?"
LC: "um...well I was wondering if you guys could make an order for a party but have us bring in the cups to put it in?"
Me: "Yea. We can do that. All you have to do is tell us what size the cups are and what flavors you need and how many guests you're serving and we can figure out how much of each flavor to make you."
LC: "um..ok...thanks" *click*

CW looks to me to see if we need to start making drinks but I just shrug and think nothing of it. If they want to place an order they'll call back.

20 minutes later...

CW: *phone spiel* "How can I help you?"
FC: "I was looking at your menu online and I want to know about your flavors."
CW: "sure! What do you need to know?"
FC: "Well, I was wondering about Peach Drink A and Peach Drink B. Which one is lighter?"
CW: "Lighter? As in flavor? Well Peach A is more of a mixed fruit drink but is mostly peach flavored and Peach drink B is pretty much just peach."
FC: "No. No. I mean in color. Which one is a lighter peach?"
CW: "oh....um well the Peach drink B is kinda a bright peach color while Peach drink A is more of a red color due to the strawberries."
FC: "k'bye!" *click*
CW: looks at me "What the hell?"

10 minutes later...

Me: *spiel*
LC: "yes, I spoke with you earlier about an order? Well we're having a problem trying to figure what flavors we need."
Me: "ok. Well that usually pretty easy to figure out. What flavor of fruit do you or the guests prefer? Our most popular five are A, B, C, D, and E."
LC: "I'm not really looking for flavors. I'm more concerned with um...colors."
Me: "Colors?! um...well..ok that's not a problem. We can pretty much figure out any color to fit with your color scheme."
LC: "oh! oh..ok! well, you see, it's not really for a color scheme per se.....just the theme of the party. We just need a drink that will be realistic."
Me: *realistic!? what the hell?* "What is the theme of the party? If I know that maybe that will help me out."

*CW is over my shoulder listening...giggling...yea it was that slow

LC: "well...god this is embarrassing....the party is for a wedding..um..shower..
FC (in background): WHAT THE HELL? IT'S NOT A WEDDING SHOWER! YOU'RE SUCH A WIMP! GIMME THAT! *PHONE SHUFFLING AND CHATTING BACK AND FORTH BETWEEN THE TWO..* "Hello? Sorry about that! The party is a bachelorette party. The bride is obsessed with your store. We're looking to fill about 24 penis shaped cups. Shaft and Balls. What flavors do you have that are skin toned?"
CW:
Me: "Well we have a peach flavor that should work...um....oh! our white mystery flavor (named after the candy it tastes like) is pretty fleshy looking! Also we have chocolate and if you want we can do an all white drink with sorbet."
FC: "Awesome! Well...we have 24 people to serve how much will that be?"
Me: "It depends how big the er...cups are. We have 3 sizes but I can split cups if need be. How big are the cups?" *giggle*
FC:" Oh don't worry honey! We got them FULL SIZED! And they come apart too! We wanted to make sure our girl got some practice!! But, I'm not sure how much liquid it holds. I've never tried to fill one up..ya know? and I know that it's gotta be more that what comes out! Tell ya what...Me and LC will come in with one and we can go from there! Expect us in about an hour! See ya later!" *click*
CW: OMG! I can't wait until they come in! They better show up during my shift!! How does the two part work? Drink from both ends? Should we make the balls a different color?
Me: I have NO idea!

Sadly we never saw or heard anything else from them. I'm not sure if it was a prank call or not (both ladies sounded like it was real) but either way, it made my day!!! CW and I would crack up anytime we had to make a "flesh colored" smoothie!

[EvilEmpryss]

I was having a blast with the whole idea of the "specialty cups" until they got to the point where they couldn't tell you how much each one would hold. Then my stupidly practical brain came up with the simple solution of filling one with water and then pouring it into a measuring cup.

Talk about a mood-killer.

Still, I love the fact that you were getting creative with the different colors/flavors. If I ever host a bachelorette party I'm going to have to remember this one!

[Whiskey]

I need to party with FC right now.

[lordlundar]

I get the strangest feeling that while FC was discussing this with you, LC was turning whole new shades of red in embarrassment.

[Krandor]

I get the strangest feeling that while FC was discussing this with you, LC was turning whole new shades of red in embarrassment.

Which is probably why they never showed. If talking about it embarrassed her, think about bringing in her... cup... to the store.

[MoonCat]

'k, that's a new one. Hmm. Visuals...yeah. OK.

[Magpie]

Am I the only one who feels sorry for the bride? I know the purpose of the party is to humiliate her, but that sort of novelty is supposed to be for consenting adults, no?

[Sheldonrs]

What's the big deal? Don't most bachelorette partys off cocktails?

[EvilEmpryss]

Once you pick a maid/matron of honor, you are assumed to be consenting to anything she comes up with for your party.

And you should know your MoH well enough to be ready for something of this caliber. This is not something that she could have come up with without warning. There are personality traits in play here that are just not possible to hide from a close friend.

[Whiskey]

purpose of the party is to humiliate her,

Do what now?

[Magpie]

Do what now?

It's for a bachelorette party. They're like bachelor parties, but raunchy. They tend to involve making the bride do something really embarrassing AND lots of innuendo.

And I didn't have a choice in my maid of honour, and she wasn't the one who was wanting to throw me a party. (There are advantages to being a rude person, also to the person wanting to throw the party knowing that she's already getting some say in other stuff.)

[Bunny the Veggie Slayer]

I get the strangest feeling that while FC was discussing this with you, LC was turning whole new shades of peach drink A in embarrassment.

Fixed it for ya!

[Spork4pedro]

I was having a blast with the whole idea of the "specialty cups" until they got to the point where they couldn't tell you how much each one would hold. Then my stupidly practical brain came up with the simple solution of filling one with water and then pouring it into a measuring cup.

It's not uncommon for people to not be able to figure out how much of what size they need if they're going to split cups/put it in a different container. Apparently math is not our friend. Although it never really bothered me since I can usually figure it out fast than they could anyway so it just is easier.