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I need BRAIN BLEACH! Stat!

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  • #16
    Could have been worse... She could have asked about cleaning charges.

    Some stains can take forever to get out (especially of your mind!)
    Sorry, my cow died so I don't need your bull

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    • #17
      What do you wanna bet that her sex life consists of her calling hotel clerks and coyly hinting at the scandalous details of her (imaginary) shenanigans while she...while she....

      Rats. Where's the brain bleach?
      To seek it with thimbles, to seek it with care;
      To pursue it with forks and hope;
      To threaten its life with a railway share;
      To charm it with forks and hope!

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      • #18
        When we drove to Fresno through Reno the motel we stayed at had a heart shaped bed, hot tub in the room, mirrored walls and ceiling, 4 channels of porn, a free bottle of somewhat champagne and if we had opted for the $100 room, toys

        We were somewhat nervous about some of the porn, it looked like it had been shot in a cheap motel room from a hidden camera and we were sort of wondering if we would show up on one of the channels in the future
        EVE Online: 99% of the time you sit around waiting for something to happen, but that 1% of action is what hooks people like crack, you don't get interviewed by the BBC for a WoW raid.

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        • #19
          If this were me, as soon as she mentioned the mirror and the toys, I would have assumed it was a prank call and then hang up.
          To right the countless wrongs of our days... We shine this light of true redemption, that this place may become as paradise...Oh, what a wonderful world such would be...

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          • #20
            What about Kinky Kelly's interspecies erotica? I heard that was a great show, can I get it set up in your hotel?

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            • #21
              Now wait. She wants to know if the hotel provides, ahem, "toys"? Does she not realize that if they did, other people would have used them???

              Or does she think you might provide brand new ones in a nice little airtight sealed package?
              When you start at zero, everything's progress.

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              • #22
                If they did that I would hope that they would charge more. I'd certainly pay for unused merchandise.
                My Guide to Oblivion

                "I resent the implication that I've gone mad, Sprocket."

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                • #23
                  Supposedly, hotels that offer "toys" offer only new, clean toys only. At least I would hope.

                  This story is so gross, I'm kinda thinking reading these is the best way to prevent weight gain while I continue my quitting smoking life......no way I'm eating while reading about big ladies wanting mirrors on the ceiling and porn and toys.
                  You really need to see a neurologist. - Wagegoth

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                  • #24
                    LMAO I sowwy Blas.

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                    • #25
                      Since the guests would probably steal the toys anyway, I'm sure they would be new and you would pay for them when renting the room.
                      HTH

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                      • #26
                        Quoth AccountingDrone View Post

                        We were somewhat nervous about some of the porn, it looked like it had been shot in a cheap motel room from a hidden camera and we were sort of wondering if we would show up on one of the channels in the future
                        Steve and Marcy?
                        Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

                        "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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                        • #27
                          Quoth MoonCat View Post
                          Now wait. She wants to know if the hotel provides, ahem, "toys"? Does she not realize that if they did, other people would have used them???
                          Quoth MoonCat View Post

                          Or does she think you might provide brand new ones in a nice little airtight sealed package?
                          A few years ago when my friend was staying at some random hotel in Germany she sent me a picture of the adult vending machine in her room. It was a little one where you pay and the door for that selected compartment opens (I guess they don't want merchandise to get damaged by being dropped), the had around a dozen or so options (not including condoms, wich I think it also had) in various price ranges, don’t know if this is typical of hotels offering toys or not.

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                          • #28
                            If a hotel DID offer toys...WHY THE F**K would you wan to use them when other peoples "juices" have been on there?

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                            • #29
                              Ok, for my honeymoon, our room had a little bottle of fake champagne (sparkly juice, we were both under 21) a hot tub...and a tealight candle. I'm sure we could have bought porn, but everything else was family friendly. Except the hot tub...they put some sort of stuff in it that made the water blue-ish and chemical smelling. I wanted to sit in it...but it burned my hand...so I think it was cleaner?
                              We couldn't hook up Rockband though...so I played DS and hubby played his Xbox he managed to hook up to the tiny television in the corner. We're soooo mature and adult.
                              Oh wook at teh widdle babeh dwaggin! How cyuuute babeh dwag-AAAAAAAUUUGGGHHHH! *nom*
                              http://jennovazombie.deviantart.com

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                              • #30
                                Quoth superhotelworker View Post
                                Me: Hi. I'm cute. Love me?
                                Are you sure you want to open with this, considering the conversation that followed?

                                My bet is that it was a prank. Starts out fairly tame and then ramps up to the ridiculous. Seriously, suspension devices? Somehow I doubt any hotel not specifically advertising such amenities would ever have them.

                                ^-.-^
                                Faith is about what you do. It's about aspiring to be better and nobler and kinder than you are. It's about making sacrifices for the good of others. - Dresden

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