No candles? I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your store down

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Woman and her fuck buddy meat dildo husband come up to me at work today, ask if we have any Christmas pillar candles.

We do not, and I inform her of this fact. However, we do carry a vast array of jar candles in Christmas scents like pine, cinnamon spice, sugar cookie, and so forth. Perhaps too vast even. We also have a selection of flameless LED pillar candles, which do come in Christmas scents and designs. They have a battery and a switch, and the LED "flame" flickers like a real candle flame, but there is no actual flame, and thus this particular candle is much less likely to burn your house to a crisp. The company is really investing heavily in flameless candles. I almost want one. It would be effortless decoration.

Woman, however, does not like flameless candles, so I tell her there's no other flameless candles. So she stands around and inspects our normal array of decorative candles, harumph-ing and huffing and puffing and sighing like a bratty kid whose just been told she can't annoy everybody with her Justin Bieber CD played at maximum volume any more.

Alas, no apparent indication that her Christmas has been permanently ruined. But we're not to Thanksgiving yet.

[chainedbarista]

you've ruined yet another christmas before the turkey has hit the table? SCORE! something so unimportant ruins a holiday? that's a fucked set of priorities (if there are any).

[Grape The Cat]

Oh, candle., I once ruined somebody's Christmas because we didn't have Apple-Cinnamon scented candles. What is it with people and candles, anyway?

[chainedbarista]

grape kitty sayeth:

What is it with people and candles, anyway?

are you sure you really want the answer? i'm afraid to ask myself...

[zombiequeen]

Candles are tasty, yo.

I've never heard of a flameless pillar candle though, that sounds like a great thing...I'm going to be decorating and my parents get nervous when my husband (maybe me too) has access to hot wax and an open flame...

[dalesys]

... What is it with people and candles, anyway?

Weelll, Freyaday, I've been on this island for a long long time without the companionship of...

[LadyAndreca]

What is it with people and candles, anyway?

Fiiiiiiiire....

Of course, hubby and I buy ours from a local dollar store where we can get 4-6 votives or 6-8 tapers for a buck. We used to go through them pretty fast, but our cats have no fear of fire and are quite willing to stick their noses into an open flame to see what the flickering thing is. It's amazing we haven't lost any whiskers yet. But if we MUST HAVE a certain size/color/shape/scent (though usually not scent, hubby's unusually sensitive) then we'll make our way to the store and pay full price without fuss.

Or, y'know, spend a couple hours deciding to melt down, re-dye, and re-mold our current collection.

[ralerin]

What is it with people and candles, anyway?

Fire.

That, or it makes the house smell nice pretty fast.

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Weelll, Freyaday, I've been on this island for a long long time without the companionship of...

You too? We should go over to the Pervfest Thread and start a support group.

[wheeitsme]

I love the flameless ones. I have several that turn themselves on and off. 8 hours on and then 16 hours off. The pillar ones I have are wax. I also have some plastic ones in a brass candelabrum I inherited from my mom. You don't have to worry about wax going everywhere, or things catching on fire.

[Amina516]

I have doggies and im HORRIFIED (seriously, its one of my biggest fears) that someone will come over to a house that smells like dog. So, candle is ALWAYS on. From when I wake up til I go to bed...(unless I leave the house).

[PepperElf]

i like candles - regular & flameless alike.

from the real ones i like the natural light. i also like to read by candle light.
and from the flameless ones ... i like the fact that i can have something similar for when the real ones are too dangerous.

and for the flameless... they're especially nice on Navy ships when you can't have an open flame in your rack. (same for my battery operated christmas lights). and they're good for my halloween pumpkins that are made of styrofoam.

but never in a million years would i act like Christmas just cannot happen without these.

mainly because if i can't get the ones i like... well there's a new air freshener with a little light in the bottom. can't say much for the smell but the light is pretty.