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Just Hear Those Alarm Bells Jingle-ing...(bit of language)

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  • #1

    Just Hear Those Alarm Bells Jingle-ing...(bit of language)

    In the spirit of Johnny Mathis and continuing my roll on of Christmas related songs, I bring you the only true SC at my Aid of Rite today. (I don't count those who use cellphones at the register and who pull a catbutt face when I tell them the "Healthiness+" reward coupon prints out and they don't pay the sale price right away as SCs anymore, they're too commonplace.)

    I also did not think I would have the events of this thread happen in my life but they did!

    This is somewhat second hand, I came in just as the alarm is going off and was told about it after.

    The pharmacy at my Aid of Rite closed at 3 today so the pharmacists could go home and have their dinner and spend it with their families. The pharmacy has five metal roller grates that come down behind the pharmacy windows (one behind the half door that leads to the pharmacy) as well as a very loud alarm system. The grates are EXTREMELY easy to see.

    SC comes in, bangs on the metal grates, reaches down onto the half door, unlocks it and yanks it open, and continues banging on the metal grates and shouting. Very LOUD alarm goes off and he gets pissed. SM comes running up and asks SC just WHAT the hell is he doing? Alarm is going full tilt...BREEBREEBREEBREEBREEBREEBREE....

    "I NEED MY PILLS!"

    "WELL THE PHARMACY IS CLOSED SIR."

    "THAT IS BULLSHIT I NEED MY PILLS YOU NEED TO UNLOCK THE DOOR NOW."

    "NO. GET OUT OF OUR STORE. NOW. POLICE ARE ON THEIR WAY."

    "FUCK YOU THIS IS BULLSHIT. *STORM AWAY*"

    Since it's a holiday the police and the alarm people take an extra five minutes to come shut off the alarm.

    *

    Mini Bonus: "Are You Open?"

    LOADS of this tonight.

    "Thank you for calling Aid of Rite, this is ralerin speaking how may I help you?"

    "Are you open?"

    "Of course."

    "Ok. *click*"
    Success is not final, failure is not fatal: It is the courage to continue that counts.-Winston Churchill
    Tags: None
  • #2
    That small one reminded me of my Christmas last year where I was working Christmas Eve (that or New Years Eve) and some guy came in and this is how it went down:

    Confused Guy: When do you close?
    Me: Twenty-four, seven, three-sixty-five.
    CG: No...when do you close TODAY.
    Me: ....Twenty-four, seven, three-sixty-five.
    CG: You don't close today?
    Me: ....We never close. Ever. At all, nada.
    CG: NOT EVEN ON CHRISTMAS?!
    Me: ......................... Three. Sixty. Five.

    Comment

    • #3
      So, Gaki, every leap year the store closes for a day? (runs and hides)

      Comment

      • #4
        Yup, I got the same thing. Someone could NOT get the concept of 365 days in a year and told me as much. "It confuses me when you say that!"
        Success is not final, failure is not fatal: It is the courage to continue that counts.-Winston Churchill

        Comment

        • #5
          Quoth dbuzman View Post
          So, Gaki, every leap year the store closes for a day? (runs and hides)
          Well, they were closed February 29th, 1900...
          I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
          Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
          Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

          Comment

          • #6
            Quoth Gaki View Post
            That small one reminded me of my Christmas last year where I was working Christmas Eve (that or New Years Eve) and some guy came in and this is how it went down:

            Confused Guy: When do you close?
            Me: Twenty-four, seven, three-sixty-five.
            CG: No...when do you close TODAY.
            Me: ....Twenty-four, seven, three-sixty-five.
            CG: You don't close today?
            Me: ....We never close. Ever. At all, nada.
            CG: NOT EVEN ON CHRISTMAS?!
            Me: ......................... Three. Sixty. Five.
            "So, why are there locks on your doors? GOTTCHA!!!"

            "Kamala the Ugandan Giant" 1950-2020 • "Bullet" Bob Armstrong 1939-2020 • "Road Warrior Animal" 1960-2020 • "Zeus" Tiny Lister Jr. 1958-2020 • "Hacksaw" Butch Reed 1954-2021 • "New Jack" Jerome Young 1963-2021 • "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff 1949-2021 • "Beautiful" Bobby Eaton 1958-2021 • Daffney 1975-2021

            Comment

            • #7
              Quoth El Pollo Guerrera View Post
              "So, why are there locks on your doors? GOTTCHA!!!"

              Actually, there's a perfectly rational reason for that..."Because Big Brother says we have to have them." ...You don't want to upset The Computer Big Brother, now, do you...? Hmmmmmmmmmm?
              "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
              "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
              "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
              "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
              "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
              "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
              Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
              "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

              Comment

              • #8
                Quoth ralerin View Post
                ...
                Alarm is going full tilt...BREEBREEBREEBREEBREEBREEBREE....

                "I NEED MY PILLS!"

                "WELL THE PHARMACY IS CLOSED SIR."
                ...
                Assuming I had sufficient mental accuity surviving the the miasma of fail wafting off IDIOT...

                I would have dummied up and debated with IDIOT until the cops showed up.

                After all, cops don't like rewardless alarm response runs...

                And perp burpin' the baby, taking him home and tucking him into their crib...

                Priceless!
                I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
                Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
                Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

                Comment

                • #9
                  "I NEED MY PILLS!"
                  obviously, but that's not all you're in need of.
                  look! it's ghengis khan!
                  Sorry, but while I can do many things, extracting heads from anuses isn't one of them. (so sayeth the irv)

                  Comment

                  • #10
                    Quoth ralerin View Post
                    "I NEED MY PILLS!"
                    "By the look of things, I think you've had *enough* pills."
                    Aerodynamics are for people who can't build engines. --Enzo Ferrari

                    Comment

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