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I’m pretty sure that today was probably the most bizarre day I’ve ever had at my job. Ever.
Background: I work in a leasing office, just me and the manager cause it’s a small property. I was scheduled to be off today, but early in the morning manager called to ask if I could work cause he allegedly had a splitting migraine. (His immune system seems to uncannily weaken each weekend because he only ever calls in sick on Mondays, but I digress.) I had eight bajillion things to do today – an ultrasound first thing in the morning (I’m over 7 months with child), a 3-hour childbirth class in the evening, and several assignments due at midnight for grad school, not to mention that I have to clean my apartment so my obsessive-compulsive mother doesn’t shit a brick when she gets into town in a few days. Against my better judgment, however, I agreed to do him a favor and come in. Due to the aforementioned commitments I had to open late and close early.
During the 6.5 hours I was at work, I had ten tours. TEN. Three of these groups wanted to see EVERY DAMN FLOOR PLAN on the property. One guy called me on the phone and spoke with me approximately 3 minutes to ask about prices and set a tour appointment. When he arrived a couple hours later – dressed as a cowboy, no less – he yelled, “Hi, Zoe!” and ran up and gave me a hug. I got a hug after the tour, too.
Also had to do a move-in, a move-out, quite a few legal forms, and the phone rang off the hook. All by myself. Needless to say, I got no school work done and was getting progressively more anxious and grumpy as the day went on.
The highlight of the day, though, came when a current resident stopped by. He is transferring to a larger apartment. I’d heard he was moving on the first, but called to say he wanted to get keys so he could start moving furniture in today. He’s on a month-to-month rental agreement right now, so I told him no problem. I then began explaining how I would calculate what he owed to do this (about $55, since he’d paid rent thru the month for his current place so I was gonna prorate the price difference between the two apartments for the rest of the month) and he cut me off and yelled, “You’re just trying to take my money! I’ll be at the office in 15 minutes.” Right. I know I suck at explaining prorates and such over the phone so I took a deep breath and wrote it all out on a piece of paper in the hopes of clarifying it when he got there.
Well, he arrived and we started going over it, and it quickly became clear that the confusion was over the fact that he wanted to sign a new lease and officially move in on the first, but start putting things in the new place today. Ahh.
Me: I see now! Unfortunately, though, for insurance reasons and also because of the Fair Housing Act I can’t give you keys and let you put things in the apartment unless you sign a lease.
Grumpy Old Schmuck: But I don’t want to move in until the first!
Me: I understand; however, regardless of whether you are actually living there, you are legally occupying the apartment once your property goes into it.
GOS: Why are you being so difficult with this? That’s stupid! It’s not like you’re going to rent the place for just two weeks!
Me: I’m sorry, I know it’s inconvenient, but my hands are tied. We can give you a few days to transfer your belongings from one place to the other, but I would be violating the law and could get into very serious trouble if I allowed you to occupy two apartments at once for three weeks while unless you assumed responsibility for both of them.
GOS: You’re just lying because you want my money!
Lather, rinse, repeat.
Since he was insisting that I’m making it up – because apparently I personally benefit somehow from the property getting his extra money? – I called the manager at home as I saw no other way to convince GOS that I’m telling the truth. Manager was understandably annoyed when he picked up, but when he heard me explaining the situation in my Helpful Leasing Agent Voice (TM) and realized who was there he quickly understood. He repeated exactly what I’ve just told GOS, who I made sure was close enough to me that he could hear Manager’s voice on the phone backing me up.
GOS: Now [manager] is lying! You’re all just thieves, making this up!
Me: I promise you, we are not. All residents have to follow the same policies. I wish there was more we could do.
GOS: That’s stupid! [His tone quite clearly says, YOU’RE stupid!] What are you going to do, rent that apartment for just two weeks?
Me: Of course not. However, that’s three weeks that you’d be occupying both apartments while only paying rent for one, and that’s time that we could be re-renting your old place. Like I said, we can give you a few days, but any more than that and we are losing quite a lot of money.
GOS: What the hell is wrong with you, why don't you get it!? I'm NOT occupying both places. I'm just going to keep occupying my studio till the first!
Me: I understand that you wish to continue to live in your current place till the first. However, you are LEGALLY occupying the apartment as soon as your belongings are in there, regardless of whether you are sleeping and staying there or not. That is according to the Landlord-Tenant Act. We can't clean and re-rent an apartment when your things are still in it.
GOS: You people are ridiculous! [begin rant about how difficult it is to reach anyone in the office, how we never, ever help him -- even though the manager and staff have done all kinds of shit out of our way for him for years – and how all we care about is making money off a poor old man like him. Continue ranting about how his “stupid kid” is worthless because he won’t drop everything and move his stuff for him at his whim and how the “stupid kid” doesn’t care about him, and so on…] You’re a goddamned liar!
Me: I promise, we aren’t lying, and other landlords have to follow the same policies. Would you like me to go online right now and print you a copy of the Fair Housing Act? Or the state's Landlord-Tenant laws? I can have both in your hands within about 20 seconds.
GOS: No! You’re just going to make it up! You can make anything on the computer!
Me: Then I’m not sure what else I can do for you today. You are welcome to come talk to [manager] tomorrow, he should be back in.
GOS: I won’t! You people won’t help me! I shouldn’t even bother to move!
Me: In that case, you would like me to cancel your hold on the new place? [still using my friendly voice, offering him back the check he has written for February rent to hold the new apartment]
GOS: What, why do you want to give that check back to me? Are you trying to rent out from under me it to someone else now?!
Me: Nevermind, sir, I misunderstood. The place is held for you unless you tell us otherwise. [I show him his name on the hold on the computer] Feel free to call [manager] with any questions in the meantime.
GOS finally leaves.
The maintenance supervisor (MS) is watching all of this, and as soon as the door shuts and GOS rolls away, MS starts cussing. “That &^$@ing #*$@! He called you stupid! You should have kicked him out of the office because I was THIS close to haling off and punching him in the face!” Which is horrible in a rather hilarious way to imagine because MS is a trained cage-fighter, and GOS is an octogenarian in a motorized wheelchair.
MS is awesome.
My ankles now look like cantaloupes after all those tours. The manager SO owes me for coming in today, big time.
Background: I work in a leasing office, just me and the manager cause it’s a small property. I was scheduled to be off today, but early in the morning manager called to ask if I could work cause he allegedly had a splitting migraine. (His immune system seems to uncannily weaken each weekend because he only ever calls in sick on Mondays, but I digress.) I had eight bajillion things to do today – an ultrasound first thing in the morning (I’m over 7 months with child), a 3-hour childbirth class in the evening, and several assignments due at midnight for grad school, not to mention that I have to clean my apartment so my obsessive-compulsive mother doesn’t shit a brick when she gets into town in a few days. Against my better judgment, however, I agreed to do him a favor and come in. Due to the aforementioned commitments I had to open late and close early.
During the 6.5 hours I was at work, I had ten tours. TEN. Three of these groups wanted to see EVERY DAMN FLOOR PLAN on the property. One guy called me on the phone and spoke with me approximately 3 minutes to ask about prices and set a tour appointment. When he arrived a couple hours later – dressed as a cowboy, no less – he yelled, “Hi, Zoe!” and ran up and gave me a hug. I got a hug after the tour, too.
Also had to do a move-in, a move-out, quite a few legal forms, and the phone rang off the hook. All by myself. Needless to say, I got no school work done and was getting progressively more anxious and grumpy as the day went on. The highlight of the day, though, came when a current resident stopped by. He is transferring to a larger apartment. I’d heard he was moving on the first, but called to say he wanted to get keys so he could start moving furniture in today. He’s on a month-to-month rental agreement right now, so I told him no problem. I then began explaining how I would calculate what he owed to do this (about $55, since he’d paid rent thru the month for his current place so I was gonna prorate the price difference between the two apartments for the rest of the month) and he cut me off and yelled, “You’re just trying to take my money! I’ll be at the office in 15 minutes.” Right. I know I suck at explaining prorates and such over the phone so I took a deep breath and wrote it all out on a piece of paper in the hopes of clarifying it when he got there.
Well, he arrived and we started going over it, and it quickly became clear that the confusion was over the fact that he wanted to sign a new lease and officially move in on the first, but start putting things in the new place today. Ahh.
Me: I see now! Unfortunately, though, for insurance reasons and also because of the Fair Housing Act I can’t give you keys and let you put things in the apartment unless you sign a lease.
Grumpy Old Schmuck: But I don’t want to move in until the first!
Me: I understand; however, regardless of whether you are actually living there, you are legally occupying the apartment once your property goes into it.
GOS: Why are you being so difficult with this? That’s stupid! It’s not like you’re going to rent the place for just two weeks!
Me: I’m sorry, I know it’s inconvenient, but my hands are tied. We can give you a few days to transfer your belongings from one place to the other, but I would be violating the law and could get into very serious trouble if I allowed you to occupy two apartments at once for three weeks while unless you assumed responsibility for both of them.
GOS: You’re just lying because you want my money!
Lather, rinse, repeat.
Since he was insisting that I’m making it up – because apparently I personally benefit somehow from the property getting his extra money? – I called the manager at home as I saw no other way to convince GOS that I’m telling the truth. Manager was understandably annoyed when he picked up, but when he heard me explaining the situation in my Helpful Leasing Agent Voice (TM) and realized who was there he quickly understood. He repeated exactly what I’ve just told GOS, who I made sure was close enough to me that he could hear Manager’s voice on the phone backing me up.
GOS: Now [manager] is lying! You’re all just thieves, making this up!
Me: I promise you, we are not. All residents have to follow the same policies. I wish there was more we could do.
GOS: That’s stupid! [His tone quite clearly says, YOU’RE stupid!] What are you going to do, rent that apartment for just two weeks?
Me: Of course not. However, that’s three weeks that you’d be occupying both apartments while only paying rent for one, and that’s time that we could be re-renting your old place. Like I said, we can give you a few days, but any more than that and we are losing quite a lot of money.
GOS: What the hell is wrong with you, why don't you get it!? I'm NOT occupying both places. I'm just going to keep occupying my studio till the first!
Me: I understand that you wish to continue to live in your current place till the first. However, you are LEGALLY occupying the apartment as soon as your belongings are in there, regardless of whether you are sleeping and staying there or not. That is according to the Landlord-Tenant Act. We can't clean and re-rent an apartment when your things are still in it.
GOS: You people are ridiculous! [begin rant about how difficult it is to reach anyone in the office, how we never, ever help him -- even though the manager and staff have done all kinds of shit out of our way for him for years – and how all we care about is making money off a poor old man like him. Continue ranting about how his “stupid kid” is worthless because he won’t drop everything and move his stuff for him at his whim and how the “stupid kid” doesn’t care about him, and so on…] You’re a goddamned liar!
Me: I promise, we aren’t lying, and other landlords have to follow the same policies. Would you like me to go online right now and print you a copy of the Fair Housing Act? Or the state's Landlord-Tenant laws? I can have both in your hands within about 20 seconds.
GOS: No! You’re just going to make it up! You can make anything on the computer!
Me: Then I’m not sure what else I can do for you today. You are welcome to come talk to [manager] tomorrow, he should be back in.
GOS: I won’t! You people won’t help me! I shouldn’t even bother to move!
Me: In that case, you would like me to cancel your hold on the new place? [still using my friendly voice, offering him back the check he has written for February rent to hold the new apartment]
GOS: What, why do you want to give that check back to me? Are you trying to rent out from under me it to someone else now?!
Me: Nevermind, sir, I misunderstood. The place is held for you unless you tell us otherwise. [I show him his name on the hold on the computer] Feel free to call [manager] with any questions in the meantime.
GOS finally leaves.
The maintenance supervisor (MS) is watching all of this, and as soon as the door shuts and GOS rolls away, MS starts cussing. “That &^$@ing #*$@! He called you stupid! You should have kicked him out of the office because I was THIS close to haling off and punching him in the face!” Which is horrible in a rather hilarious way to imagine because MS is a trained cage-fighter, and GOS is an octogenarian in a motorized wheelchair.
MS is awesome.My ankles now look like cantaloupes after all those tours. The manager SO owes me for coming in today, big time.
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