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After the downer I posted a few days ago, I thought I'd drag out my funniest SC story, and the cause of a running gag at my work.
Crazy Lady is a repeating sucky customer (although hopefully she'll be gone for a while, after her most recent escapade) who I've dealt with several times. In fact, she was one of my first sucky customers -- she badgered me on one of my first days working alone, insisting that I take a return that she KNEW I couldn't take. She tried to poll the other customers to get them to throw down on her side. The only reason I didn't cave was because I feared my boss more than I feared her.
Anyway, the next day at work, I was talking with a co-worker, complaining about this lady, and my co-worker said: "Oh, her? She's crazy. She used to work here."
She went on to tell me a great story. Apparantly, Crazy Lady worked at my store for all of a week or two. Trouble was, she didn't want to actually work. She just wanted to knit. She didn't even want to ring customers up. She wanted, I kid you not, to be paid to sit around and knit all day. The old manager was having none of that (predictably), and so Crazy Lady wound up quitting in the middle of her shift. She just walked out.
Now, I trained under the old manager, and she can be a bit annoying, and some of her sales practices were counterproductive, but I can't imagine her doing anything so extreme that it would cause anyone reasonable to walk out in the middle of a shift. And it isn't as though my job is even very hard. The customers are, with a few notable exceptions, really, really sweet. I've had people bring me homemade baked goods. You all would kill for my customers. Not that I'm goating.
If you or I had gotten ourselves hired, behaved like pampered princesses, and then walked out mid-shift, we (being not-crazy people) would at the very least realize that we'd probably ticked off the people working there, right? And we wouldn't come back? Not Crazy Lady. She seemed to think that no one would care, and came back as a customer soon after without as little as a 'by your leave'.
Crazy Lady was trying to get into knitwear design. I'd seen some of her work, and it was okay. It looked nice, although there was nothing to set it apart from all of the other better known designers out there. I hadn't taken her up on her MANY requests to have me test-knit her patterns, because I'd heard people who were far more skilled than I am talk about how many oodles of mistakes her patterns had. One woman, who is a goddess with yarn, told me that she actually faked a wrist injury to get out of having to keep struggling with the pattern because while she could have re-written it to look the way Crazy Lady had intended, she didn't really want Crazy Lady then taking credit for what would essentially be her pattern. Later, Crazy Lady told me how it had gotten back to her what this woman had said and she started ranting that the woman must be a terrible knitter, because the pattern WAS TOO clear.
Crazy Lady has a tendancy to call me at work and just talk and talk and talk and talk and refuse to shut up until I have to lie and tell her I have a customer. Then she'll wait fifteen minutes and call me back.
One day, Crazy Lady called to tell me that she had some patterns all completed, and she wanted to drop them by and have us sell them at our shop. I was internally rolling my eyes, but I told her I'd ask my boss. She spent the next 20 minutes trying to sell me on the patterns. I told her I'd ask my boss, and I had a customer (store was deserted) and I'd get back to her. I hung up and called my boss.
Me: Hey, Boss? Crazy Lady just called. She has some patterns she wants us to sell at the store. I told her I'd ask you about it, but I think I should warn you --
Boss: Wait, Crazy Lady? Are you talking about the same Crazy Lady who used to work here?
Me: Er, yeah.
Boss: *derisive laughter* I can't believe she has the nerve! Okay, look. Give me her number. I'm going to call her and explain some things.
Me: You're not taking the patterns, right? Because I've heard that even the test knitters couldn't finish them.
Boss: Don't worry, after her showing last time, I don't intend to do business with her ever again. Did you hear what she did?
Me: Yeah, I heard.
I gave my boss Crazy Lady's number, but her husband, bless him, must have talked her down at the last minute, because a couple of weeks later, Crazy Lady called back to find out how things were going. I had, in the meantime, had an attack of remorse -- not for siccing my boss on Crazy Lady, but rather for not volunteering to run interference and play the bad guy. My boss pays me enough money that I ought to be doing the dirty work. So I decided to go ahead and not dodge this one. Hilarity, as they say, ensued.
Crazy Lady: Hi, Arachne! I'm calling to find out if you've heard anything from Boss about the patterns?
Me: Yeah, I talked to her. I'm sorry I didn't get back to you sooner. Listen, Boss isn't really comfortable entering into another working relationship with you after last time.
Crazy Lady: But... why not?
Me: (Does she really not have a clue?!) Err... as I understand, there were some objections to your job performance.
Crazy Lady: But I didn't do anything wrong! Except walk off the job in the middle of a shift.
Me: That's generally not considered the sort of thing one does.
Crazy Lady: But! But! It wasn't my fault! I had health problems! I explained it all to Boss!
Me: That was before my time, so I really don't know. All I know is what Boss said.
Crazy Lady: But... Oh, okay. *hangs up.*
I hung up the phone and filled another co-worker in on the whole story. We were still laughing about it, when the phone rang again. Guess who it was? It was Crazy Lady! She'd finally thought of a snappy comeback!
Me: Hello, MyStore, this is Arachne, how can I help you?
Crazy Lady: I don't appreciate you being so rude to me!
Me: Crazy Lady, I haven't been rude to you. I've been relaying a message. That message is 'No.' I understand that it's dissapointing, but I think that making accusations isn't called for.
Crazy Lady: But it wasn't my fault! I had health problems!
Me: And I'm sorry to hear it.
Crazy Lady: Stop being so judgemental!
Me: It really isn't my call.
Crazy Lady: WHOSE CALL IS IT?!
Me: Er. It's Boss' call. She owns the store.
Crazy Lady: *pause* Well I write all of my patterns based on philosophy, and I think Boss should read one of them.
Me: I really don't think that --
Crazy Lady: The pattern is called 'FORGIVENESS'! It's a virtue, you know!
Me: (So is responsibility.) Um. Yeah. Okay. Listen, I have a customer. I have to go.
I slammed the phone down minutes before I burst out laughing. For the rest of the night, my co-worker and I would occasionally get in the other person's face and say: "FORGIVENESS is a VIRTUE!"
Later on, Crazy Lady called to threaten never to shop at the store again. I considered admonishing her to forgive us (because it's a virtue) but decided against it. She might have taken my words to heart, and then where would I be?
Crazy Lady is a repeating sucky customer (although hopefully she'll be gone for a while, after her most recent escapade) who I've dealt with several times. In fact, she was one of my first sucky customers -- she badgered me on one of my first days working alone, insisting that I take a return that she KNEW I couldn't take. She tried to poll the other customers to get them to throw down on her side. The only reason I didn't cave was because I feared my boss more than I feared her.
Anyway, the next day at work, I was talking with a co-worker, complaining about this lady, and my co-worker said: "Oh, her? She's crazy. She used to work here."
She went on to tell me a great story. Apparantly, Crazy Lady worked at my store for all of a week or two. Trouble was, she didn't want to actually work. She just wanted to knit. She didn't even want to ring customers up. She wanted, I kid you not, to be paid to sit around and knit all day. The old manager was having none of that (predictably), and so Crazy Lady wound up quitting in the middle of her shift. She just walked out.
Now, I trained under the old manager, and she can be a bit annoying, and some of her sales practices were counterproductive, but I can't imagine her doing anything so extreme that it would cause anyone reasonable to walk out in the middle of a shift. And it isn't as though my job is even very hard. The customers are, with a few notable exceptions, really, really sweet. I've had people bring me homemade baked goods. You all would kill for my customers. Not that I'm goating.
If you or I had gotten ourselves hired, behaved like pampered princesses, and then walked out mid-shift, we (being not-crazy people) would at the very least realize that we'd probably ticked off the people working there, right? And we wouldn't come back? Not Crazy Lady. She seemed to think that no one would care, and came back as a customer soon after without as little as a 'by your leave'.
Crazy Lady was trying to get into knitwear design. I'd seen some of her work, and it was okay. It looked nice, although there was nothing to set it apart from all of the other better known designers out there. I hadn't taken her up on her MANY requests to have me test-knit her patterns, because I'd heard people who were far more skilled than I am talk about how many oodles of mistakes her patterns had. One woman, who is a goddess with yarn, told me that she actually faked a wrist injury to get out of having to keep struggling with the pattern because while she could have re-written it to look the way Crazy Lady had intended, she didn't really want Crazy Lady then taking credit for what would essentially be her pattern. Later, Crazy Lady told me how it had gotten back to her what this woman had said and she started ranting that the woman must be a terrible knitter, because the pattern WAS TOO clear.
Crazy Lady has a tendancy to call me at work and just talk and talk and talk and talk and refuse to shut up until I have to lie and tell her I have a customer. Then she'll wait fifteen minutes and call me back.
One day, Crazy Lady called to tell me that she had some patterns all completed, and she wanted to drop them by and have us sell them at our shop. I was internally rolling my eyes, but I told her I'd ask my boss. She spent the next 20 minutes trying to sell me on the patterns. I told her I'd ask my boss, and I had a customer (store was deserted) and I'd get back to her. I hung up and called my boss.
Me: Hey, Boss? Crazy Lady just called. She has some patterns she wants us to sell at the store. I told her I'd ask you about it, but I think I should warn you --
Boss: Wait, Crazy Lady? Are you talking about the same Crazy Lady who used to work here?
Me: Er, yeah.
Boss: *derisive laughter* I can't believe she has the nerve! Okay, look. Give me her number. I'm going to call her and explain some things.
Me: You're not taking the patterns, right? Because I've heard that even the test knitters couldn't finish them.
Boss: Don't worry, after her showing last time, I don't intend to do business with her ever again. Did you hear what she did?
Me: Yeah, I heard.
I gave my boss Crazy Lady's number, but her husband, bless him, must have talked her down at the last minute, because a couple of weeks later, Crazy Lady called back to find out how things were going. I had, in the meantime, had an attack of remorse -- not for siccing my boss on Crazy Lady, but rather for not volunteering to run interference and play the bad guy. My boss pays me enough money that I ought to be doing the dirty work. So I decided to go ahead and not dodge this one. Hilarity, as they say, ensued.
Crazy Lady: Hi, Arachne! I'm calling to find out if you've heard anything from Boss about the patterns?
Me: Yeah, I talked to her. I'm sorry I didn't get back to you sooner. Listen, Boss isn't really comfortable entering into another working relationship with you after last time.
Crazy Lady: But... why not?
Me: (Does she really not have a clue?!) Err... as I understand, there were some objections to your job performance.
Crazy Lady: But I didn't do anything wrong! Except walk off the job in the middle of a shift.
Me: That's generally not considered the sort of thing one does.
Crazy Lady: But! But! It wasn't my fault! I had health problems! I explained it all to Boss!
Me: That was before my time, so I really don't know. All I know is what Boss said.
Crazy Lady: But... Oh, okay. *hangs up.*
I hung up the phone and filled another co-worker in on the whole story. We were still laughing about it, when the phone rang again. Guess who it was? It was Crazy Lady! She'd finally thought of a snappy comeback!
Me: Hello, MyStore, this is Arachne, how can I help you?
Crazy Lady: I don't appreciate you being so rude to me!
Me: Crazy Lady, I haven't been rude to you. I've been relaying a message. That message is 'No.' I understand that it's dissapointing, but I think that making accusations isn't called for.
Crazy Lady: But it wasn't my fault! I had health problems!
Me: And I'm sorry to hear it.
Crazy Lady: Stop being so judgemental!
Me: It really isn't my call.
Crazy Lady: WHOSE CALL IS IT?!
Me: Er. It's Boss' call. She owns the store.
Crazy Lady: *pause* Well I write all of my patterns based on philosophy, and I think Boss should read one of them.
Me: I really don't think that --
Crazy Lady: The pattern is called 'FORGIVENESS'! It's a virtue, you know!
Me: (So is responsibility.) Um. Yeah. Okay. Listen, I have a customer. I have to go.
I slammed the phone down minutes before I burst out laughing. For the rest of the night, my co-worker and I would occasionally get in the other person's face and say: "FORGIVENESS is a VIRTUE!"
Later on, Crazy Lady called to threaten never to shop at the store again. I considered admonishing her to forgive us (because it's a virtue) but decided against it. She might have taken my words to heart, and then where would I be?
I just loathe clueless people!! I mean, she is completely clueless all around - thinking that she could walk out mid-shift - no matter what the reason - and expect to continue some kind of business/working relationship - CLUELESS!
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