Haagen Daas Insurgency

[Eisa]

Now all I can think of is this song [NSFW!]

[42_42_42]

I guess I'm a masochist, because reading G/K's posts makes me wish his company was here in Atlanta so's I could go work there. I'd be worth all the crazies to be able to work alongside G/K. Although, MAARTA might not supply quite the same entertainment that the Skytrain does.

[Pairou]

Don't know if I've mentioned this enough yet, but your posts get me through the week. <3

[MoonCat]

SC: “I’d like to speak with a hermaphrodite please?”
Me: “…with….what, sorry?”
SC: “Oh, my mistake. <click>.”

First one, and it totally cracked me up.

SC: “This is Jacqueline from <company>”
Me: “Alright, can you spell your first name please?”
SC: “Jacqueline”
Me: “Yes, but how do you spell it please?”
SC: “My name is Jacqueline”
Me: “Can you spell it please?”
SC: “I’m calling from <company>”
Me: “Yes, but can you spell your name please?”
SC: “About serial #xxxxxx”
Me: “Alright, but can you spell your name for me please? So I have it correct on your service request?”
SC: “Jacqueline”
Me: “Can you spell it please?”

So she can't spell it either? Oh dear.

[El Pollo Guerrera]

Hot Tips

SC: “You should make Warren Buffet president.”

No.

You should make JIMMY Buffett President!

Cheeseburgers for everyone!

And with THIS as his campaign song, he can't loose!

(Possibly not safe for work)

[Mongo Skruddgemire]

Incorrect!

SC: “Is this a taxi?”
Me: “No, you have the wrong number.”
SC: “Oh, alright, thanks <click>”

“Alright, thanks”? The correct response isn’t “Alright, thanks” it’s “Oh god I’m so SO sorry for calling you this late at night I hope I didn’t disturb you please forgive me it will never happen again, SORRY <click>”.

In the guy's defense, at least he didn't rob you of 20 minutes of your life that you'll never get back by arguing with you about the fact that you're not a taxi service, claim that it is your fault that they dialed the wrong number, or try to do both at the same time.

Count your blessings on that one.

[AriRashkae]

We May Never Know

You can’t tell whether the “Fox Bossa Nova Jacket” is a jacket or a sweater? It seems to me there’s a rather large hint to be found somewhere within the product description that could unravel this complex mystery for you.

"No one can figure out if the hot tea is hot or cold?"

[nicolecj]

The pinky and the brain comment makes this only better!

[Animae]

Is anyone else besides me sort of curious as to the shoes that Pink man was wearing?

[Andara Bledin]

It is once again time. As I slowly and horrifyingly approach my 10th year of working in this industry, my spirit wanes.

Wow. You've survived a whole decade of that? No wonder your snark is so well honed.

Thank you, now I’ll be spending the rest of my waking hours today praying I heard that wrong.

Considering the number of times you've had sex-industry style callers, I'm starting to thing that there's a new phone sex service that's set up with a number way too close to one of your clients. Are these all coming in on the same line or different ones?

Hot pink neon dress. Hot pink neon belt. Hot pink neon knee high stockings. Black fishnets under those though. Oh, and a blond perm that even Janis Joplin wouldn’t have left the house with.

Ok. While I may be guilty of such things in, say, City of Heroees, Gaia or various silly online games (one even included the black fishnets, scarily enough), I would never commit such a terrible fashion crime in person.

You need more than some fishnets to break it up.

SC: "And what he wants is burnt offerings, the he’ll let you know how to resolve the situation in Iran.”

You know, he could be right about the burnt offerings. But, you know, maybe it's more along the lines of, say, funerary ashes burnt. I mean... seven times, and all.

That’s why you have President Obama and Vice-President Joe Biden and not President Gary Busey and Vice President The Four Year Supply of Red Bull He’s Legally Obligated To Drink From Before Addressing Congress.

Even without the Red Bull, a Busey presidency would be quite an interesting event. Not sure it's one I'd want to live through, but it would certainly be good for news outlets and political cartoonists.

I would like to officially put in a request to Client Services to permit the use of the phrase “Please take the phone out of your mouth” on this line ( the...northmost one ) without being penalized during my QA reviews.

If it were in my power, I would so grant you this request without a moment's hesitation.

That's the same line thats been getting all the sex line wrong numbers lately. I'm really starting to wonder.

*nods* Yup. New line opened up somewhere that's close to yours.

I'd suggest trying to find out what it is, but the scarring from such a search on the Internet has the potential to destroy even a mind as strong as yours.

^-.-^

[Jester]

As I slowly and horrifyingly approach my 10th year of working in this industry, my spirit wanes.

10 years, huh? Why do you keep doing it? I mean, I've been in the food service industry for close to 25 years (good lord, have I really?!?), but for the most part, I like it. What the hell is your excuse?

Something hot neon pink. Hot pink neon dress. Hot pink neon belt. Hot pink neon knee high stockings. Black fishnets under those though. Oh, and a blond perm that even Janis Joplin wouldn’t have left the house with.

It was a guy.

My first reaction: "So?"

My second reaction: "Good lord, I really have lived in Key West too damn long!"

Thank you. Yes, that’s right. Thank you. Why, you ask? Because after years of listening to your depraved gibbering you’ve finally given me, and everyone else that reads this, a method of identifying you should they ever find themselves sitting near you on transit.

That's assuming, of course, that your caller is telling the truth, or even has some semblance of what the truth is. Considering the ravings of these particular callers, I wouldn't put too much stock in that.

SC: “Because I’ve been clinically dead 7 times.”

And are still clinically brain dead.

You can’t tell whether the “Fox Bossa Nova Jacket” is a jacket or a sweater? It seems to me there’s a rather large hint to be found somewhere within the product description that could unravel this complex mystery for you.

Considering how often companies misrepresent what they are selling, intentionally or not, or how off some of their product descriptions are, I'm not sure your caller is too far off base here.

Remember, McDonald's claims to sell hamburgers. You know, patties of BEEF. But we all know that that just ain't the case! (There are many other examples, of course....I just like picking on fast food establishments.)

[El Pollo Guerrera]

Remember, McDonald's claims to sell hamburgers. You know, patties of BEEF. But we all know that that just ain't the case! (There are many other examples, of course....I just like picking on fast food establishments.)

I heard that someone is currently trying to sue Baco Tell because a study revealed the meat in their... 'bacos' was less than 40% meat.

[Muses_nightmare]

That Which Struts

You know, I made the fool mistake of looking out at the platform when the Skytrain pulled into Broadway this evening. I know I shouldn’t. I know there are things out there better left unseen. Yet still I gaze. Only to realize that some thing had wandered into my field of vision. Something hot neon pink. Hot pink neon dress. Hot pink neon belt. Hot pink neon knee high stockings. Black fishnets under those though. Oh, and a blond perm that even Janis Joplin wouldn’t have left the house with.

Oh GK, you say. That’s just a run of the mill fashion disaster, it wasn’t some horrible, emotionally scarring theatre of misery you accidently bore witness too!

And to you, I say: It was a guy.

Today at Renfrew I saw a shirtless bald guy wearing hot pink sleeves (arm warmers? They covered the whole arm), with frilly cuffs. Given he may have been attacked by a fashion student from AI :P or you know, is a fashion student. Or something relating to my former school...

[Darkforge]

Hot Tips

SC: “I have the ark of the covenant tattooed on my right hand.”

Thank you. Yes, that’s right. Thank you. Why, you ask? Because after years of listening to your depraved gibbering you’ve finally given me, and everyone else that reads this, a method of identifying you should they ever find themselves sitting near you on transit. Which has, for many years, been one of my deepest fears. Now I know exactly how to spot you. Which should give me enough time to run before you realize there’s something nearby you can share an opinion with that isn’t furniture.

nah, sorry to disapoint gravekeeper but it's probably just the stamp they put on the back of his hand from visiting the funfair.

[mharbourgirl]

I guess I'm a masochist, because reading G/K's posts makes me wish his company was here in Atlanta so's I could go work there. I'd be worth all the crazies to be able to work alongside G/K. Although, MAARTA might not supply quite the same entertainment that the Skytrain does.

I went to Atlanta once for a convention. I can confidently argue that MAARTA is an incestuous cousin of Vancouver's finest transit system.

That was in 1993, though, so it's probably even better now than it was then.

GK, the only 24-hour places I could find in the downtown core were Shoppers Drug Mart (hammer possibly, but likely nothing better than small nails for hanging pictures) and a whole bunch of coffee shops (like I expected THAT to change). Not even a 24-hour Wal-Mart. You'd think in a city that would stop running entirely if the coffee ran out there would be 24-hour EVERYTHING.

I did find out that Naam is still there, though! I may have to come back for a visit, it's THE best veggie restaurant that ever existed and nothing here comes close.