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  • Hold the phones!

    Okay, so this morning I was on a call with a claimant. During the call she disputed some fairly complicated information that I needed to gather from a couple of different sources. I figured it would take a moment or two so I asked her to hold on while I found that for her, she was being sweet and polite and seemed to be upstanding. I have no faith in humanity though and the reason why was verified yet again. You see, I put the phone on mute, not hold, because our hold iffy about getting people back and it is so much easier just to hit mute on the headsets.

    What I heard from this polite young lady next confirmed why I hate people.

    Mind you, this is just a paraphrased version.

    Lady: This skanky-b**** better hurry her a$$ up. I gots things to do. Lashaun wants me to pick his ass up to get some weed, and I gots court at 3. She probably some racist skinny-a$$ white chick so I don't know why I am even talkin to her, she don't know nothing. I should go down there in beat her a$$.

    Generally I just let them ramble and don't really mind being called a b**** or something, but at this point I feel the need to interject.

    Me: Mam, I can still hear you. I was just looking up the requested information. Please be aware that if you talk about illegal activities I will be obliged to report them to the police. Also, I feel it imperative to inform you that threats to any employee here, myself included, can be considered a felony. Please take that into consideration before saying anything further.

    Lady: What! I thought I was on hold! (stuttering and sputtering) you know what, do what you have to do, I don't want to talk to you no more. *hangs up*

    Me:


    I deal with fraud, I know from the get go that our relationship will not be a happy one, but really?
    "I've put in so many enigmas and puzzles that it will keep the professors busy for centuries arguing over what I meant, and that's the only way of insuring one's immortality."
    - James Joyce

  • #2
    OT: nicolecj, I love your new avatar. I am a big Angry Birds fan.
    "I don't have to be petty. The Universe does that for me."

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    • #3
      I think I can see why she is in contact with the Fraud department - and presumably not as the potentially defrauded party.
      Seshat's self-help guide:
      1. Would you rather be right, or get the result you want?
      2. If you're consistently getting results you don't want, change what you do.
      3. Deal with the situation you have now, however it occurred.
      4. Accept the consequences of your decisions.

      "All I want is a pretty girl, a decent meal, and the right to shoot lightning at fools." - Anders, Dragon Age.

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      • #4
        I wonder if her court date is for.. Oh, I don't know- possession of an illegal substance?
        http://www.customerssuck.com/?m=20080203

        My destiny is not pretty, but it's what my cutie mark is telling me.

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        • #5
          Quoth HappyFun Ball View Post
          I wonder if her court date is for.. Oh, I don't know- possession of an illegal substance?

          Either that or attempted assault or communicating threats. Take your pick.

          Either way, I'm sure the judge who had to see her in his/her courtroom probably needed a couple of Excedrin afterwards.
          Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

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          • #6
            This sometimes happens at the Drive-Thru speaker. People assume because they can't hear me, I can't hear them. Not so. I have the ability to turn off my headset so I can talk without the customer hearing me. The speaker, however, doesn't shut off until the car drives away. I've heard them calling me a dumb bitch, saying I have an annoyingly friendly voice, swearing about how I mistypes then fixed their order, etc. I LOVE being able to get on the speaker to say, "Sir/mam, I feel the need to inform you the speaker does not shut off until you drive away".
            Answers: $1
            Correct Answers: $2
            Answers that require thought: $5
            Dumb looks are still free.

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            • #7
              Oh, you're nicer than me.

              I wait until they get to the window to comment on their conversation.

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