I am not "The Help"

[Zellie Crescent]

That whole thing makes me want to cry, when my grandfather was still alive he needed help with some things and WE helped him. It was our job as his family to help him, I just feel so bad about the old man that his stupid, ignorant, entitled "family" can't be bothered to help him. I just wanna cry now.

[Ironclad Alibi]

£2.95? The hell with that.....£29.95....at least!

But it was £2.95 per cut.

[PatchO'Black]

Once again, Jester proves he is full of "Win", as the young folks say. Remember to be on the look-out for his new album, "Jester: Songs of the Bar Gods".

Now, my take on the matter is that if they had explained in advanced that the elderly gentleman would need the sandwich cut up when they had ordered it, perhaps the kitchen could have accommodated him. Not only didn't they take this step, but they seemed to harbor a misconception among many SCs: If you give a person money, no matter how small or what it was originally paying for, all employees of that company must now attend to the SCs every whim. This "family" (and I only use the term as, technically, that is what they are, though they did not behave as such) is woefully misinformed as to their knowledge of the services a member of the wait-staff should be expected to do.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

I feel bad for that poor old guy I bet the daughter told her husband "SEE, I knew we shouldn't have taken dad out for his birthday, I mean REALLY they expected us to feed him..... UHHHHHHHH, idiots can't understand that is why we lock him at the nursing home"

Would it be too jaded of me to say I agree with this?

[Caractacus_Potts]

My motto is, Give them a inch they'll take a mile

My motto is give them one septillionth of a millimeter and they'll take a parsec but it's the same idea.

[Jester]

Once again, Jester proves he is full of "Win", as the young folks say. Remember to be on the look-out for his new album, "Jester: Songs of the Bar Gods".

Duh...WINNING!

But seriously, the album in question will be a spoken word album, with no songs, as I have all the singing ability of an albino transvestite crippled arthritic slug. I can do an amazing Bob Dylan impression, but yeah, I am far more impressive speaking than I am singing. Witness my DJ career and the intimidating commentary I laid down on of several teenage boys who were dating or attempting to date my nieces.

[dalesys]

... I can do an amazing Bob Dylan impression...

"Bob Dylan has a voice like a dog with its leg caught in a barbwire fence." - The Dillards: !!!Live!!! !!!almost!!!

[Becks]

I have all the singing ability of an albino transvestite crippled arthritic slug.

That's so cool!!!

[Jester]

"Bob Dylan has a voice like a dog with its leg caught in a barbwire fence."

Precisely. I often say about my karaoke career that I can't sing, but I can do a Bob Dylan impression. Luckily, Bob can't sing either!

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Precisely. I often say about my karaoke career that I can't sing, but I can do a Bob Dylan impression. Luckily, Bob can't sing either!

You might not want to ask me to sing backup for you then. My singing has been compared to a cat left outside in a hailstorm.

[Jester]

I have only ever (voluntarily) had someone do backup for me twice. Once, a dude brought a harmonica, and played it in all the appropriate parts of "Like A Rolling Stone." It was awesome. The other time, in the karaoke bar back in Phoenix that I frequented, there was a dude who often did Guns n' Roses songs, as he did a mean Axl. One day, he and I, as Axl and Bob, did a killer rendition of "Knockin' on Heaven's Door." We brought the house DOWN.

Sadly, I have often involuntarily had backup, as people will often jump on stage and start singing along with whoever's there, just because they think that that is appropriate and okay. Which, of course, it isn't.

"The douchebag, my friend, is singing on the stage....the douchebag is singing on the stage."

[Mytical]

I don't make peoples' ears bleed when I sing country..but anything else and no guarantees (about ears bleeding that is). I am not the biggest fan of country, but it is the only type of song that I don't sound like a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.

Oh and gospel..I am passable at gospel.

However, this may sound odd..when I .. feel the song ..I've been told I can actually sing..have my doubts..but meh. I tend to get lost in the song, though, when that happens.

[Teysa]

I think I would have been tempted to accidentally on purpose spill the lady's drink in her lap. Then again there's a reason why I'm not a server. Working retail for too darn long has made me despise the general public. I have even less respect for someone who would treat a family member like that.

As for my singing, I'm not good enough that people would pay to listen to me, but I'm not so bad that they'd pay to get me to shut up, either.

[Primer]

I have had a restaurant cut my steak to me - I believe the cook did it. However, I was a regular, on good term with the wait staff, eating alone and had my arm in a sling. Oh - and she offered when she realized I was ordering something I usually didn't eat because I couldn't cut the meat myself.

I've been in a sling a few times myself, and unable to cut up food. I've always tried to remember to get food that I can cut with the side of a fork, or be sure I'm with someone willing to cut my food for me. If I were ever in the situation of needing food cut otherwise, I would not even consider asking for help. I'd get a to-go box--ok, I'd need help putting the food in the box--and take it home where table manners would not matter. I can gnaw my way around the edge of a steak speared on a fork!

[Gerrinson]

Personally, I hope that the family was mislead by a lawyer to believe that the old man in the wheelchair is filthy rich and this is they're way of making out well in the will. Only to find out when he passes that they've inherited nothing because he was dirt poor.

Similar to what Matt Damon's character in Rainmaker did for his landlady.