You've just thrown up on yourself, you have to go

[customersruinmylife]

Very strange story. I wasn't directly involved, but saw most of what happened.

It was just about closing time, so quite a lot of our customers were drunk, as usual. It was mainly students, who are the most annoying customers in the world. I should point out that I am myself a student, but they are terrible terrible customers. Our shift manager is interuptted by a customer who tells him that someone is throwing up in the toilets.

As the manager walks towards the toilets, this student dwarf with long ginger hair stumbles out the toilets, covered in sick. The shift manager walks in just to inspect the damage. The guy had thrown up just about everywhere, inside and outside the cubicles, and for some reason, he had removed his UNDERWEAR and was sick all over that as well.

The shift manager walks out.

SM: Shift Manager
PM: Pub Manager
GF: Geek Face

He goes over to the table, and explains to the three students that their mate is drunk and that they have five minutes to finish their drinks and leave. They all look shocked and offended, even though their mate in still throwing up. He returns.

SM: OK, you've had five minutes, time to go.

He grabs their drinks.

Suddenly, one of the students (not the ginger guy, he was so drunk he couldnt speak) starts screaming! And this was the geekiest looking student I had ever seen, typical geek, bad hair, a dwarf, giant glasses and fat.

GF: NO! NO! HOW DARE YOU! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!

The shift manager looks startled. At this point I am about to walk over to the guy, but our pub manager beat me to it. Our shift manager is quite a small guy, so no one finds him that threatening, but our pub manager is the size of a house, you wouldn't mess with him.

PM: OK, what is going on?
GF: THAT IRISH B*****D TOLD US TO GET OUT!!

Our shift manager is Canadian

I watched this for several minutes. It was hilarious to watch, this complete and utter geek, screaming at the top of his voice at a guy that could probably kill him with his thumb. As this was going on, the manager had a huge grin on his face, not taking him seriously at all.

PM: OK, you have to go, all of you.
GF: NO! NO! NO! *Stamps feet* WE ARE NOT GOING! I WANT FREE DRINKS FOR THIS!

At this point his friend falls over and throws up again.

PM: Right, get out. *grabs guy by shoulders and begins to push him out the door*
GF: YOU CAN'T DO THIS! YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHO YOU ARE DEALING WITH! I'M GOING TO OWN YOU ALL ONE DAY!

Another thing about students. They think that they are so much better than everyone else, believing they will get the highest paid jobs in the world with their degrees. They don't seem to realise that 99% of our staff are students (including the shift manager) and are only working to pay our way through university.

[Geek King]

As a represenative of the Modern Geek Movement (MGM, you might have seen some of our informative movies), I take offense at this person being assosiated with our movement. Clearly he was an assbag, perhaps even an asshat, but not a Geek. No self respecting Geek would act in such a sucky manner, unless, of course, sci-fi memorabilia was in the local. Then puking in the presence of greatness is, while disgusting, completely understandable.

[AirHostess]

OMG

And I agree with the student thing...

[protege]

Another thing about students. They think that they are so much better than everyone else, believing they will get the highest paid jobs in the world with their degrees.

If they truly believe that, reality will kick them in the nuts after graduation. They're in for quite a shock

[AFpheonix]

Methinks this particular specimen transcends even the nerd label, and goes directly into dork territory.

[ominousoat]

Methinks this particular specimen transcends even the nerd label, and goes directly into dork territory.

Ah, it's time for the socially inept dichotomy.

Geek: Geeks are the high end of the spectrum, almost social, almost normal. They are intelligent and use their intelligence for good, not inane. There can be obsession, but the average geek is quite well rounded and can see there are more things in life other than anime, star trek, and porn.

Nerd: The nerd is also intelligent; however, he uses his intelligence to learn klingon or lines from monty python movies. He is capable of being good in studious things, but he is defined by his obsession with things labeled "nerdy" or "geeky".

Dork: A dork is completely defined by social ineptitude. He is strange, obsessive, and unable to function in the outside world. His idea of "society" is completely based around Azeroth.

[myswtghst]

Liking the classifications. Myself? I'm a geek, and proud of it.

And seriously? If your friend is throwing up on himself and can no longer stand on his own, it makes you an asshat if you don't take him home, immediately.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

I will proudly out myself as a geek also.

Star Trek never appealed to me, and my command of Monty Python quotes is not as good as that of many others.

[Imogene]

I myself am mostly geek, with some nerd thrown in for good measure.
However, I resent the fact that D&D is not involved in your social partitions.

[ominousoat]

I myself am mostly geek, with some nerd thrown in for good measure.
However, I resent the fact that D&D is not involved in your social partitions.

World of Warcraft is the new D&D. But yes, Dungeons and Dragons does indeed fit nicely into any of those categories, with geeks playing it for fun, nerds playing it for keeps, and dorks playing it in costumes...with the lights off...illuminated by candles...with a cardboard cut-out of Mila Jovovich in "The Fifth Element" as their fourth player...smeared in cheeto dust...

[Buglady]

Where does majoring in Classics fall on the geek/nerd scale? Just curious. I don't play any WoW or D&D, I just read everything that isn't actually nailed down and make puns in several languages. I always thought that put me *somewhere* on the spectrum! :P

[ominousoat]

Where does majoring in Classics fall on the geek/nerd scale? Just curious. I don't play any WoW or D&D, I just read everything that isn't actually nailed down and make puns in several languages. I always thought that put me *somewhere* on the spectrum! :P

That requires further definiton, since you're in the "geek" category, but it's more of a "book geek" sort...

[Seshat]

It depends. Do you read classics for fun, for keeps, or in costumes...with the lights off...illuminated by candles...with a cardboard cut-out of Helen of Troy as your reading partner...smeared in cheeto dust...?


(Edit to add: and do you recognise my username, without having to refer to Google or your texts?)