A days worth of Airport questions

[RentalRacer]

Questions asked of me today...keep in mind I am in car rental, not working for an airline, TSA, or anything else airport related. I really do try to help most people, but sometimes my inner wiseass takes over.

Q. Does the American flight land upstairs or downstairs?
A. Sir, all flights will land out on the runway. As to what gate people will arrive at, that would be gate 2, which is over there on the right.

Q. (At 11:30am) Has the 1pm Continental flight to Philly started boarding yet?
A. Ahh no, the flight from Philly has to arrive first, it is due in 12:30.
Q. Why does that matter?
A. Hmmm if the flight has not arrived, than the plane to go back to Philly is not here. Pretty hard to board a plane when it is not here.

Q. Do flights both arrive and depart here? (we get this A LOT!)
A. Nope, just arrive. Pretty soon some are going to have to leave, we have 4 years worth of planes parked all around here.

Q. Can you tell me where my bags are?
A. Unless you left them in one of my rental cars, then no.

Q. How much is a taxi from here to there?
A. I have no idea. I can rent you a car for $xx.xx.
Q.How can you not know how much a taxi costs?
A. Gee sir, I don't know. Maybe its because I work for x car rental. Hey, maybe go next door to the Avis counter. Not only do they try harder, their name is also an anacronym for "Airport Visitor Information Service".

Q. Where is the upstairs?
A. Up there(points at ceiling).

[ominousoat]

I have a bad feeling I would be a sucky customer were I confused in a large airport...

[Rahmota]

Rental Racer said:

Q. Does the American flight land upstairs or downstairs?
A. Sir, all flights will land out on the runway. As to what gate people will arrive at, that would be gate 2, which is over there on the right.

Well in response to that you could have said "It will land on the runway unless the pilot used to be in the Navy then it will be upstairs."

I am hoping beyond hope that I do not spaz out when I go flying here in a month. I promise that I will try and not be a sucky person but deinately will be a fish out of water.

[Sailornight6]

as sad as this is, i can see my self asking a question like that. airports make brains go bye bye

[JustaCashier]

Q. Can you tell me where my bags are?

A. Right under your eyes!

Mike

[imal'sheva]

The question about arriving and departing might be that he wondered if the arrived and departed from the same terminals

[Boozy]

Q. Do flights both arrive and depart here? (we get this A LOT!)
A. Nope, just arrive. Pretty soon some are going to have to leave, we have 4 years worth of planes parked all around here.

I love it.
Airline executive: "THAT'S where all the planes went! Geez, we gotta start looking at our logistics."

[BookstoreEscapee]

Why would the car rental guy know when your flight departs?

I like your answer to "where's the upstairs?" I'd love to use that in my old store. One of the cafe guys used to always refer to the cafe as "upstairs" -- 3 stairs, to be exact .

[Auto]

To me, it really wouldn't matter if the questiosn were stupid or not, but that they're directed at someone who works in a car rental shop, not for an airline or for the airport.

I'd have responded by telling them to get their needs taken car of by the airline folks.

[BookstoreEscapee]

The fact that they're asking the car rental guy is what makes most of them stupid

[Mongo Skruddgemire]

Q. (At 11:30am) Has the 1pm Continental flight to Philly started boarding yet?
A. Ahh no, the flight from Philly has to arrive first, it is due in 12:30.
Q. Why does that matter?

Question to any neurologists out there who might read this site on a regular basis.

What percent of the brain has to be damaged before people start asking that question?

Damn that's @#$%ing stupid.