Go ahead. I dare ya.

[AmandaLaederich]

Living in a college town is not with its ups and downs. The down being when there is a home football game this town goes nuts! As I'm sure with most college towns ANYWAY!

There were many of drunken customers coming in to the store so I don't even know where to begin with the sucky customer stories, so I'll just tell you my favorite one.

One drunk comes in and is of course denied more booze because he can hardly stand up straight. This is of course followed up by the typical "I'm not that drunk" speech, just plain stupid argument, and ended with the typical blank stare they all seem to get when they realize we're serious. This little gem however, took it to a whole new level of stupid by threating to call the cops if I didn’t sell to him.
Which only resulted in me laughing in his face and daring him to do it, probably not the smartest thing I’ve done, but dang do they make it hard not to laugh in their faces!

[Zellie Crescent]

So, did the idiot end up doing it?

[AmandaLaederich]

So, did the idiot end up doing it?

Na, he just called me a loser and stomped out.

[PepperElf]

i would have loved to see him try. i guess he knew how stupid it would have been for him as well though?...

[taxguykarl]

Na, he just called me a loser and stomped out.

Bummer...too bad the cops didn't end up coming about their complaint. Fodder for a dumb criminal show if there ever was.

[BrenDAnn]

Na, he just called me a loser and stomped out.

Well, that was anticlimactic. Here I was, hoping for a great end to the story. Oh well. Great story anyway, in and of itself. What a dumbass!

[Jester]

SC: "Yesh, ociffer, I want ta ludge a complaint against thish LOSHER and thish eshtab...eshtab...eshtublishmeat. They won't serve becush they say I'm too drunk. But cleely I am purrfectly SHOBER! Ociffer....ARRESHT THEM!

COP:

[Kittish]

LOL, I'd have handed the guy the phone and dialed the number for him.

[Mr Hero]

I'd have said this:
Call the cops! I dare you! I double dare you MFer!

[Racket_Man]

not only college towns but smallish towns that have pro football. I swear if this town,during a home game, could walk, it would stagger and face plant many times over.

And that is just at the game. I have to play keepaway with all of the traffic AFTER the game. Then watch in bored silence when some drunk decides to get out of his vehicle and change clothes in the middle of a busy intersection. Then fend off the drunk pedestrians who either a) have no concept of mortality or b) think I am a taxi.

[sms001]

. . . smallish towns that have pro football.

The smallest, by a good margin below Buffalo and N'arlins.

And I never thought of you in that mess before RM. It's bad enough out here in the sticks, I can't even imagine what the inebriation level is like at ground zero. Be careful.

[PepperElf]

SC: "Yesh, ociffer, I want ta ludge a complaint against thish LOSHER and thish eshtab...eshtab...eshtublishmeat. They won't serve becush they say I'm too drunk. But cleely I am purrfectly SHOBER! Ociffer....ARRESHT THEM!

COP:

Is it bad that I'm imagining that in Ron "Tater Salad" White's voice?

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Is it bad that I'm imagining that in Ron "Tater Salad" White's voice?

No . . . I did the same thing.

[Racket_Man]

The smallest, by a good margin below Buffalo and N'arlins.

And I never thought of you in that mess before RM. It's bad enough out here in the sticks, I can't even imagine what the inebriation level is like at ground zero. Be careful.

My store is only 4 blocks away from the world known temple of American football so I am literally at ground zero. On game day the population literally double the size of the town.

Traffic is a total nightmare for 5 miles around the stadium as people park on the street, on people's lawns, and fill the local parking lots to capacity.

Add to that the amount of alcohol people have comsumed or WILL consume and it makes for fun up to 3 hours after the game ends.

[wolfie]

Traffic is a total nightmare for 5 miles around the stadium as people park on the street, on people's lawns, and fill the local parking lots to capacity.

WTF? Parking on people's lawns? Do the homeowners call to get the cars towed, or are they (and probably the tow truck drivers too) at the game as well, so they don't see the offending vehicles?