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I stumbled across this site about a month after I started working at my current place of employment. I have been lurking on the site for a while now; I finally have the motivation to make an account. I work as a cashier at a local sporting goods store in the middle of Nowheresville. Pretty much the area where I live is a historic town and the population is a good 75% redneck. At my place of work, we sell a lot of guns, ammunition, hunting and fishing supplies, camping equipment, and bucu amounts of other sporting related things; all for a discounted price. Personally, if you are deaf, blind, and can not read I would prefer you not buying a gun.
All in all, I like working there. I love my co-workers and the work itself isn't bad. The customers can be horrendous, however. And since I work in this large store that is highly understaffed and confined to the cash register area, I get the most of the customers' suckery. I am learning not to care what happens, but a few people have weaseled their way past my not-care attitude.
Druggie McScrambled-Eggs-for-Brains
The first little gem I have saved up is about this shoplifter who came into the store for two weeks strait and stole anything he could. He was as high as a kite half of the time he stumbled in. I first noticed him after I took a few days off for a wedding; he came in to exchange a holder for paper targets for something else, since it wasn't what he wanted. One of my mangers pointed him out and said he was a pain in his ass the other day when he came in, but I didn't think anything of it. He didn't have his receipt, I gave him the spiel on returning items without a receipt, and he ran off to swap it for something else.
The earlier manager I mentioned left when the night manager came in and the guy came back up a few minutes later, bringing a little red cooler with him to switch: I did the swap, checked inside of the cooler, and placed his receipt in the cooler for him. I thought he left, but he ducked around and ran back into the store. My fault; I should have been paying attention to him, but I was distracted with a customer with a faulty pair of shoes. About ten minutes later, Druggie was power walking out of the store with his cooler in tow. The security alarm went off and I thought he had made a mess in his pants when I saw the look on his face. I brought him back in and opened the cooler, inside having over $100 worth of clothes with security tags on them, a packet of paper targets, and his exchange receipt at the very bottom of his goodie bag.
He said he had no idea how that was in there, I asked if he wanted it, he said no, and he booked it. And that is how I caught my first shoplifter. You think that would stop Mr. McSrambled-Eggs-for-Brains, but no. He came back for a good two weeks after that, doing the same old song and dance: stealing an item, bringing it in to swap, stealing a lot of shit, and running. Everyone who was working knew what he was doing; my managers and the floor guys would go out of their way to follow the guy to keep him from stealing anything else. Then he ran into the store manager.
I love my SM; he is like the father to everyone there. He is especially protective of the female staff. One example being SM banning a customer after he overheard the customer asking me if "My other lips were as pretty as the ones on my face." But back to the story at hand; he followed him and pretty much told him if he was caught in the store again we would call the cops on him. Haven't seen Druggie around or heard about him since it happened.
"My Boyfriend Had a Wet Dream About Me"
The best thing to hear at nine o'clock on a Saturday morning, let me tell you. This happened when the Olympics were going on. A woman calls and asks if we have professional bathing suits; not that odd of a request. We have been getting calls like that since everyone wants to get into swimming all of a sudden. But she didn't stop there. She was explaining, in detail, how her boyfriend had a wet dream about her in a professional bathing suit. If I wasn't confused and tired at the time, I think I would have been cackling like an idiot. I just told her that yes, we have the high end brand swimsuits the Olympians wear, gave her the price, put one on hold for her, and sent her on her merry way. She came in later in the week when I was working to pick it up.
"But My Feet Hurt!"
I am sorry that you didn't get the right shoe size, but I am even more sorry that we can't return or exchange them for you because there is nothing physically wrong with the shoes. We have a policy set in stone that if you wear them outside, there is no way in Hell we can sell them again. You giving me a sob story on how much pain you were in is not going to make me break company rules. You yelling at me isn't going to help your cause either. You threatening me you won't come here anymore won't scare me. You going to corporate about me isn't going to get you anything; ask the woman who sued the company last Christmas for ruining her pregnant fifteen year old daughter's Christmas. This corporation likes its money, you aren't getting it back without good reason.
Especially if they are golf shoes that you wore to a tournament the past day. If you want to invest $80 on a pair of shoes, for the love of sweet baby Jesus, try them on. If not in store, at least wear them inside of your home before you go out. Now because of you I have to tell customers about how we can't take shoes back if they are filthy and not defective.
With that, I end my first rant. There are many more stories, but these stand out the most in my head at the moment. I had a very long day today and I am making a drink. Here is to my personal Friday; I am going to need this after dealing with the woman returning $600 dollars worth of name brand clothes who didn't make the thirty day mark for returns. Flipped her lid because she didn't make it in within the thirty day limit for a return; we had to put it onto a gift card. She was pissed we couldn't put it back on her card; got even more angry when I explained she was one day passed the thirty day mark and we could not, under any circumstance, put it back on her card. Cheers everyone and goodnight. <3
All in all, I like working there. I love my co-workers and the work itself isn't bad. The customers can be horrendous, however. And since I work in this large store that is highly understaffed and confined to the cash register area, I get the most of the customers' suckery. I am learning not to care what happens, but a few people have weaseled their way past my not-care attitude.
Druggie McScrambled-Eggs-for-Brains
The first little gem I have saved up is about this shoplifter who came into the store for two weeks strait and stole anything he could. He was as high as a kite half of the time he stumbled in. I first noticed him after I took a few days off for a wedding; he came in to exchange a holder for paper targets for something else, since it wasn't what he wanted. One of my mangers pointed him out and said he was a pain in his ass the other day when he came in, but I didn't think anything of it. He didn't have his receipt, I gave him the spiel on returning items without a receipt, and he ran off to swap it for something else.
The earlier manager I mentioned left when the night manager came in and the guy came back up a few minutes later, bringing a little red cooler with him to switch: I did the swap, checked inside of the cooler, and placed his receipt in the cooler for him. I thought he left, but he ducked around and ran back into the store. My fault; I should have been paying attention to him, but I was distracted with a customer with a faulty pair of shoes. About ten minutes later, Druggie was power walking out of the store with his cooler in tow. The security alarm went off and I thought he had made a mess in his pants when I saw the look on his face. I brought him back in and opened the cooler, inside having over $100 worth of clothes with security tags on them, a packet of paper targets, and his exchange receipt at the very bottom of his goodie bag.
He said he had no idea how that was in there, I asked if he wanted it, he said no, and he booked it. And that is how I caught my first shoplifter. You think that would stop Mr. McSrambled-Eggs-for-Brains, but no. He came back for a good two weeks after that, doing the same old song and dance: stealing an item, bringing it in to swap, stealing a lot of shit, and running. Everyone who was working knew what he was doing; my managers and the floor guys would go out of their way to follow the guy to keep him from stealing anything else. Then he ran into the store manager.
I love my SM; he is like the father to everyone there. He is especially protective of the female staff. One example being SM banning a customer after he overheard the customer asking me if "My other lips were as pretty as the ones on my face." But back to the story at hand; he followed him and pretty much told him if he was caught in the store again we would call the cops on him. Haven't seen Druggie around or heard about him since it happened.
"My Boyfriend Had a Wet Dream About Me"
The best thing to hear at nine o'clock on a Saturday morning, let me tell you. This happened when the Olympics were going on. A woman calls and asks if we have professional bathing suits; not that odd of a request. We have been getting calls like that since everyone wants to get into swimming all of a sudden. But she didn't stop there. She was explaining, in detail, how her boyfriend had a wet dream about her in a professional bathing suit. If I wasn't confused and tired at the time, I think I would have been cackling like an idiot. I just told her that yes, we have the high end brand swimsuits the Olympians wear, gave her the price, put one on hold for her, and sent her on her merry way. She came in later in the week when I was working to pick it up.
"But My Feet Hurt!"
I am sorry that you didn't get the right shoe size, but I am even more sorry that we can't return or exchange them for you because there is nothing physically wrong with the shoes. We have a policy set in stone that if you wear them outside, there is no way in Hell we can sell them again. You giving me a sob story on how much pain you were in is not going to make me break company rules. You yelling at me isn't going to help your cause either. You threatening me you won't come here anymore won't scare me. You going to corporate about me isn't going to get you anything; ask the woman who sued the company last Christmas for ruining her pregnant fifteen year old daughter's Christmas. This corporation likes its money, you aren't getting it back without good reason.
Especially if they are golf shoes that you wore to a tournament the past day. If you want to invest $80 on a pair of shoes, for the love of sweet baby Jesus, try them on. If not in store, at least wear them inside of your home before you go out. Now because of you I have to tell customers about how we can't take shoes back if they are filthy and not defective.
With that, I end my first rant. There are many more stories, but these stand out the most in my head at the moment. I had a very long day today and I am making a drink. Here is to my personal Friday; I am going to need this after dealing with the woman returning $600 dollars worth of name brand clothes who didn't make the thirty day mark for returns. Flipped her lid because she didn't make it in within the thirty day limit for a return; we had to put it onto a gift card. She was pissed we couldn't put it back on her card; got even more angry when I explained she was one day passed the thirty day mark and we could not, under any circumstance, put it back on her card. Cheers everyone and goodnight. <3
Goddamnit Irv.
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