No Discount for You!

[Dips]

Geeze. A big SC drought and I get two in one week!

You know that old adage about how to attract flies?

This lady should have remembered it.

Eugene had to go home sick at noon today. So I'm handling the sales calls.

My thoughts will be in orange.

Phone rings I answer it with the usual greeting. The caller was talking VERY fast. It was pretty hard to understand her.

Caller: I need to speak with Eugene. [OK. A little on the abrupt side, but not an SC yet.]

Me: I'm afraid he's gone for the day. Perhaps I can help you?

Caller: Are you sure? I just got an email from him! [Yeah. I'm sure. Otherwise I woudn't be doing his job in addition to my own!]

Me: Yes. I'm afraid he wasn't feeling well and had to leave.

Caller: But I neeeeeed to speak with him! [And I neeeeeeed you to can the attitude, lady.]

Me: I'm afraid that won't be possible unless you want to wait until Monday. Let's see if I can help you.

Caller: He sent me a quote for $3500. It can't be right! Would *you* know anything about that? [Don't question my competence and get to the fucking point already!]

Me: Let's see. What was the quote for?

Caller: [put upon sigh, because this is obviously taking much too long for her highness] It's for adding users to a license. He quoted me $3500. [Sounds about right to me, but let's make sure.]

Me: I can certainly check that for you. What was the license number?

Caller: [Rattles off the license number so fast I almost didn't catch it, but I caught it anyway, thankfully].

Me: OK. I'm going to pull that up. It will take a few seconds.

[We both wait while the database search grinds away. One of us patiently, the other one probably not.]

Me: Yes. So they wanted to add X users to license number xxxxx, right?

Caller: Yes!

Me: Eugene did quote the correct price. It's $3500.

Caller: But we're a reseller, did he quote retail? Don't we get a discount for reselling that for you? [Whoa there! Let's back up, lady. First, don't act like you're doing us a huge favor that by reselling a license. IF you are a reseller, you will get a discount to recognize your efforts, but I don't recognize your voice (believe me, I would have remembered YOU) and I need to look you up and find out what your discount is (Background: dealer discounts vary depending on how much service they provide to their customers).]

Me: Can you give me the name of your company, please?

Caller: [Again rattles it off way too fast. This time I don't catch it. But I have suspicion about her and may not have to make her repeat herself and piss her off even more.]

Me: I'm sorry. Can you spell that for me, please? I'm going to check our database to find your reseller listing.

Caller: [snotty] We're not listed in your database! [Ding! Suspicion confirmed!]

Me: Oh, I understand. I'm afraid we can't give you a discount if you're not yet one of our resellers.

Caller: [impatient sigh] How do I do that? [You're not going to like what I say next.]

Me: You can speak with Eugene on Monday and apply to become a reseller. [Wince.]

Caller: I neeeed an answer today. This bid is due this afternoon! [And I neeeed an aspirin now! And how is the fact that you procrastinated submitting a bid anyone's problem but your own?]

Me: Unfortunately the only people who can do that are both out of the office today.

Caller: I guess we'll just have to eat it, then. [click] [Guess you will, buh bye!]

Here's the thing. I don't have anything against someone who screws up by procrastinating. I'm guilty of it too sometimes, you know?

If she'd made the slightest attempt to be polite instead of making demands, I'd have done her a favor and figured out a way to approve her as a reseller. Of course it would have required that she at least slow down enough to give me her contact information. I could see that wasn't happening. And the word "please" never left her lips even once.

She chose to bark orders at me like I'm her bitch, question the facts I was giving her and treat me like I'm not good enough to talk to her. So no favors. She can pay the asshole tax and I won't lose a wink of sleep over it.

[PepperElf]

love how they say "i neeeeeed" as if that will magically make the employee they "needed" suddenly not sick

[mjr]

love how they say "i neeeeeed" as if that will magically make the employee they "needed" suddenly not sick

That only works if you say "neeeeed" just right.

Fortunately, nobody can say it just right. I think it's happened once or twice in the history of mankind.

[EricKei]

Me: I'm sorry. Can you spell that for me, please? I'm going to check our database to find your reseller listing.

Caller: [snotty] We're not listed in your database! [Ding! Suspicion confirmed!]

So, on other words, she lied about being a reseller, and was trying to get you to give the discount anyway.

This is the point at which politeness is no longer required, and the gloves come off.

[Dips]

So, on other words, she lied about being a reseller, and was trying to get you to give the discount anyway.

This is the point at which politeness is no longer required, and the gloves come off.

I believe she was *a* reseller. She just wasn't one of *our* resellers. At least not yet.

She probably won a bid on selling a laundry list of products to a school. Then found out our product was on the list and was hoping to make a little profit on it by asking for a discount.

That's not a problem in and of itself. All they have to do is ask, right?

We'll often approve a smaller discount in these circumstances provided that the reseller provides full information about the end user and themselves. And also prepays (as long as they don't try to insist we take American Express ).

Even though the co-workers who normally handle these requests weren't around, I probably have gone out of my way to figure out how to approve her. I'm a sucker like that when someone's in a bind. Even if they put themselves in the bind by procrastinating. No need to kiss my ass or anything, just state your problem, ask what I can do and listen to my answers like an adult and equal.

Her mistake was acting as if she was already entitled to the discount just because. And not making any attempt at all to use her manners. Her tone was just unbelievablely rude and condescending start to finish. I tried to bring out her good side there; she just wasn't having it.

So I wasn't really inclined to go the extra mile, you know?

She's probably going to make enough on selling the other products on the bid that not having this discount will break her. She just would have made more money by using her manners, which would have cost her nothing.

[emax4]

Caller: I neeeed an answer today. This bid is due this afternoon!

Than the answer today is "no". If you want a better answer, and there's no guarantee on a "yes", then you'll have to wait until Monday.

[MoonCat]

God, I hate people who wait until the last minute for something! Why on earth do they assume that everybody else's schedules must be the same as theirs? We have people who work part time, people working different shifts (some days they aren't in at all!) and we do sometimes call out sick, or take a personal day (yeah, I know, we shouldn't be allowed to! We might inconvenience the customer!)

The ones I hate the most are the ones who call after 4:30 on a Friday (bonus points if it's a holiday weekend like Memorial Day or something) and say they need a price on [whatever] NOW...and the person who handles that work is gone for the day. Sorry, I'm not going to quote you on something I'm not familiar with because I KNOW you'll try to hold us to it, and if it's wrong I don't want that on my head. I understand that sometimes the boss throws something at you really late on a Friday, but most of the people who do this to us don't even have that excuse. Most of them are trying to get someone else in the dept. to quote them a lower rate than their regular sales rep already quoted them. Bastards.

[wolfie]

I believe she was *a* reseller. She just wasn't one of *our* resellers. At least not yet.

She probably won a bid on selling a laundry list of products to a school. Then found out our product was on the list and was hoping to make a little profit on it by asking for a discount.

(visit from Mr. Snippy)

She's probably going to make enough on selling the other products on the bid that not having this discount will break her. She just would have made more money by using her manners, which would have cost her nothing.

Sounds like your package is a "singleton" (i.e. can ONLY be obtained through you or one of your resellers). Any chance of rude, entitled morons being put on the "don't sell to" list? Would be interesting if you were correct (i.e. she had contracted to sell a variety of stuff, including your product), and due to her actions she wound up unable to BUY your product. Definitely penalty time (for failing to supply what she agreed to), but you'd be in the clear (due to not being party to the contract - if entity "A" agrees to sell product made by entity "B" to entity "C", and "B" refuses to do business with "A", it's "A"s problem).

[Dips]

Any chance of rude, entitled morons being put on the "don't sell to" list? Would be interesting if you were correct (i.e. she had contracted to sell a variety of stuff, including your product), and due to her actions she wound up unable to BUY your product.

Nah. That's way too vindictive. Kind of like throwing a bomb at a fly. And has bad consequences for her co-workers and the school who gave them the bid. None of whom deserve to be punished.

Better to sell and let her pay us the asshole tax.

[Kagato]

Is it wrong that when I read the thread title I heard it in the Soup Nazi from seinfeld's voice?

"NO DISCOUNT FOR YOU! Come back one year!"