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Dear Mr. Pink,
Thank you for your complaint. We here at the Blah Inn appreciate a chance to correct anything our guests might find unsatisfactory about our property. As such, let us first apologize that you awoke to find "bugs and hair" crawling on you.
It is our understanding that you became ill from your stay with us, that you remain ill, and a doctor confirms it. We apologize that you have spent close to a month and a half now sick from the crawling hair. We further understand that even though you brought your own blanket into the room to sleep beneath, and that you also told the manager you were too drunk to complain about the condition of the room when you first began your stay, we take full responsibility.
The complaint that you lodged with the Henderson County Health Department was that we never change our sheets, and that guests are sleeping on sheets that have been used by up to ten sets of previous guests. The health department was kind enough to send an inspector to our property this morning, and the experience was quite valuable. We learned, for example, that had we cleaned our ice machines with bleach as we had planned to do last week -- although we never got around to it -- our health score would have jumped by five points. As it was, the health inspector was forced to only increase our score by a single point, from 93 to 94. We sincerely regret that we were not able to score a 98 instead.
As you may be aware, any score from 90 to 100 is an A.
At any rate, Mr. Pink, please accept our apologies for any inconvenience you might have experienced during your stay with us. Although, in all honesty, it is likely that the only bugs and hair that were crawling upon you were the same that always crawl under your skin when you get the whiskey shakes. Please understand that you will not be receiving a single red cent of refund and that the Henderson County Health Department takes a dim view of frivolous complaints. Please further understand that if we see you on our property, either in the building or in the parking lot, ever again we will have you arrested for trespassing.
Again, thank you for bringing your issues to our attention, and for providing us with the chance to correct the problem.
Sincerely,
Us
Blah Inn of Hendersonville
PS: Do you tip?
Thank you for your complaint. We here at the Blah Inn appreciate a chance to correct anything our guests might find unsatisfactory about our property. As such, let us first apologize that you awoke to find "bugs and hair" crawling on you.
It is our understanding that you became ill from your stay with us, that you remain ill, and a doctor confirms it. We apologize that you have spent close to a month and a half now sick from the crawling hair. We further understand that even though you brought your own blanket into the room to sleep beneath, and that you also told the manager you were too drunk to complain about the condition of the room when you first began your stay, we take full responsibility.
The complaint that you lodged with the Henderson County Health Department was that we never change our sheets, and that guests are sleeping on sheets that have been used by up to ten sets of previous guests. The health department was kind enough to send an inspector to our property this morning, and the experience was quite valuable. We learned, for example, that had we cleaned our ice machines with bleach as we had planned to do last week -- although we never got around to it -- our health score would have jumped by five points. As it was, the health inspector was forced to only increase our score by a single point, from 93 to 94. We sincerely regret that we were not able to score a 98 instead.
As you may be aware, any score from 90 to 100 is an A.
At any rate, Mr. Pink, please accept our apologies for any inconvenience you might have experienced during your stay with us. Although, in all honesty, it is likely that the only bugs and hair that were crawling upon you were the same that always crawl under your skin when you get the whiskey shakes. Please understand that you will not be receiving a single red cent of refund and that the Henderson County Health Department takes a dim view of frivolous complaints. Please further understand that if we see you on our property, either in the building or in the parking lot, ever again we will have you arrested for trespassing.
Again, thank you for bringing your issues to our attention, and for providing us with the chance to correct the problem.
Sincerely,
Us
Blah Inn of Hendersonville
PS: Do you tip?
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