Support customer hell...

[Nekojin]

Let me make it plain first that this is a post about me as a customer, calling in to get support from my ISP. This is about sucky tech support, not sucky customers.

We use a certain major ISP for our internet connection. When we moved to our new apartment, it was determined that we could not use a standard DSL connection any more, despite the fact that we only moved about a mile. Our only options were to stick with dial-up (yecchh), or "upgrade" to their Phone & DSL package, which would give us a totally dedicated DSL line.

That worked just fine for about a day. Then we started having the DSL cut out for no apparent reason at random intervals, and would stay off for increasingly longer periods of time. After two calls, they agreed that there was a definite problem, and that they needed to send a tech out to troubleshoot the problem from our end, so that he could fix cabling if necessary. No problem so far, right?

In the meantime, we're trying to use the free backup dial-up internet connection that the ISP offers. Last night, the DSL and dial-up seemed to be working in harmony - when the DSL was there, it did most of the work, and when the DSL dropped, the dial-up picked up the slack. But this morning was different. When we attempted to surf the internet with the dial-up connection, we're unable to navigate to ANYWHERE.

So I call technical support. Have to go through two automated systems and one live person to be routed to the Dial-Up technical department. I explain the problem, and comment that it seems to not be properly acquiring DNS information. The tech responds, "Oh, dial-up doesn't use DNS." You could have heard my jaw hit the floor from the next room. I was tech support for a small-town ISP back in the days where a 33.6kbps modem was the standard; I know for a FACT that any sort of internet connection needs DNS information to properly route addresses to their actual IP location, unless you're typing in a raw IP address.

I ignored that gaffe, and humored him, and we spent another 30-40 minutes with him fumbling around, <i>clearly</i> reading off checklists, and not really getting anywhere. I finally get tired of it, and say, "Can you please escalate my call?" He responds, "Sure, no problem," and puts me on hold.

A few moments later, I hear a dial tone. He had hung up on me!

I call back, go through the same departmental routing BS, and get another tech. We're 3 minutes in, when my wireless phone's handset decides it's been off the cradle too long, and goes dead. I switch over to the other phone, call back. Again go through the routing BS, and get another tech.

The first thing I say to him is, "Please escalate my call." He good-naturedly assures me that he can help me. I explained the situation with the previous tech, and repeat my request to have the call escalated. He asks me to give him a chance. Against my better judgement, I reluctantly agree, and we spend another 40 minutes going through more failed troubleshooting attempts. I'll give this guy credit, though... he knew what he was doing, and only reverted to checklists once we got out of the conventional idiot-fix solutions. Again, I ask him to escalate the call, and he relents. I speak to a Floor Manager. We spend another 30 minutes going through some solutions, and finally, as a last resort, he asks me if the DSL network is connected, and if so, to unplug it.

Voila, problem fixed. Apparently, as long as the DSL was plugged in, the system wanted to pull DNS information through that channel only.

Total time from first call to solution: over 3 hours, including some very long hold times. I don't know if the first guy is even going to get into trouble over the matter, although I made it clear to the Floor Supervisor (who DID know what DNS information was for) that I wanted the first guy to be written up for hanging up on me.

Semi-relevant: Every single person I spoke to had a noticeable East Indian accent. I really, really hate outsourcing...

Edit: Forgot one detail. During the discussion with the really suck support guy, he had me attempt to use other dial-up access numbers. The first one he gave me resulted in a, "the number you are dialing has been disconnected or is no longer in service," error. The second one gave some strange verbal code, then a fast busy signal, then disconnected. The third he gave was a good number.

[Naaman]

Semi-relevant: Every single person I spoke to had a noticeable East Indian accent. I really, really hate outsourcing...

Meh - when I worked at <UKs second worst PC manufacturer, now bust> helpdesk (1998 - 2004) they had started shifting towards the "It doesn't matter if they're technical idiots". In the last few batches of trainees we processed virtually none had previous technical experience. What they could do, and were recruited for, was sound nice on the phone, have no pride and apologise really well...

[earl colby pottinger]

Don't always blame the tech.

While your tech seemed very bad, the cut-off may have been because of the phone system.

We use to have problems with cutoffs and bad routing of messages/callers until we standardize the layout of the phone system thru-out the company.

And standard means STANDARD! So each button location does the same thing no matter where you are in the building, even if it meant most phones had a button to route calls to itself.

Before, each phone was configured to get the max use out of the buttons at each station, but that meant a lot of buttons changed meaning depending of where you were. And if you were not paying attention you did not realize you were hitting the wrong button until right after it started to move down and by then it was too late.

[BravoOrig]

I work for a cable based ISP and we offer a free internet security suite. Well I get a customer who just wiped the HD, reinstalled everything including the security suite, and had a problem. She would tell the firewall to allow Internet Explorer online, and claimed to tell it to remember the setting. Then she'd restart the computer and it would ask again. This is not normal, it was early in the morning, and I'll help with uninstalling and reinstalling, simple settings changes, but thats it. I don't have access to a working copy, just screenshots.

So I call up the company who provides the software, and lo and behold its an outsourced tech, nice woman but she said it was normal for it to ask each time. I nicely argued with her emphasizing the point of a "Remember this setting" option. Well she agreed to take the call and I went back to surfing the net.

Nothing against outsourced techs but when I hear the voice I lose all hope for a resolution. I've had Microsoft techs conference in one of our customers for some vital settings from us and I'm lucky if I can understand them. And I'm used to talking to drunks overnight!

[Naaman]

I've had Microsoft techs conference in one of our customers for some vital settings from us and I'm lucky if I can understand them. And I'm used to talking to drunks overnight!
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Was that in a "we'll talk real technical, real fast" way?

[MadMike]

I have a bad support story of my own, which I guess turns into a good support story at the end.

My first PC was a Packard Bell, because it was cheap, and because I didn't know any better at the time.

I tolerated that stupid sound card/modem combo which often conflicted with itself and required a reboot. And I tolerated the stupid proprietary design which, when I tried to upgrade some parts, resulted in a CD-ROM drive that was held in purely by friction and a hard drive that was held in by a single screw, because the screw holes wouldn't align with the ones in the case.

But the last straw was the support nightmare I had to deal with when I called them with the problems I had upgrading my processor. It came with a Pentium 60 mhz processor, and on the box it said it was upgradable to 120. After I had it before a couple years, the prices started to really come down, so I ordered a 120 mhz processor.

It worked great -- for a few minutes. Then the whole thing locked up. So I called their support line, and after charging me $30, they told me I needed a BIOS update, which they would send out to me on a floppy. A few days later, the floppy arrived, and it was the wrong damn one!

I called them up to complain, and they said they'd resend it. Or, I could go to their site and download it myself. Why the didn't they tell me I could do that the first time? I installed the update, and it seemed to work. Until about 30 minutes later, when it decided to lock up again.

I decided to attack the problem from the other end this time. I called up Intel, which didn't cost anything. I had barely finishing explaining the problem when the tech told me he had a pretty good idea of what the problem was, and asked me to open up the case and read off the number on the motherboard. He then told me I needed something called an "interposer", which fit between the slot on the board and the processer, and that he'd send it out free of charge thru FedEx.

It arrived quickly, might have been the next day. I popped that in, and no more problems! Everything worked great until I sold it and bought a better machine three years later.

[Shabo]

Kudos to you for sticking with that machine for more than 1 year! I had that stupid thing for my first computer, probably because my parents didn't know any better either. 2 years ago, after we had already gotten not one but 2 newer computers, I asked if I could take the Packard Bell apart, and my mom didn't want to let me because she wanted to send it to my grandmother! I told her that it wasn't worth that, and she insisted that it was better than her having to go to the library every time she wanted to check email. I told her it would be so slow and cumbersome that Grandma would chuck it out the window before she ever got any email on it. Finally, she consented and let me take it apart.

I think we still have it somewhere but we haven't turned it on in years.

[Kilamon]

My first PC was a Packard Bell, because it was cheap, and because I didn't know any better at the time.

I did field support for them on a multi-vendor contract a while ago. I hated getting calls for PB Systems. Although it's bad to generalize, those calls were always the worst. The users with PBs usually bought them at Sears, didn't know anything about computers, had various animals that shed fur which was always in the case, and smoked. In one call, the computer had baby vomit on the keyboard. It was dried on. There was fur stuck in the vomit from the dog.

Somehow, the brand of computer always told me the type of person I'd be meeting. Packard Bell? 90% Larry the Cable Guy. Acer? 60% students with middle class parents. IBM? 100% Business people/environment. Gateway? All of the above with govermental stuff, too.

BTW, Mike, thanks for bringing back that memory.