Greetings that you KNOW mean bad things...

[technical.angel]

Firefox is the browser by itself, while 'Mozilla' is actually the project's entire suite of apps (Firefox, Thunderbird, etc) as a whole.

To probably needlessly clarify,

Mozilla is to Firefox as Microsoft is to Internet Explorer.

And, since we're on the topic of Firefox,

How many people get pissed when people refer to Firefox as "Foxfire"?

[RichS]

Firefox is the browser by itself, while 'Mozilla' is actually the project's entire suite of apps (Firefox, Thunderbird, etc) as a whole.

Actually, now the whole Mozilla browser/e-mail suite has a name now. It's called SeaMonkey. It's the codename that Mozilla gave it when it first was working on a browser/e-mail client.

What's nice is that it shares the same Gecko engine that Firefox and Thunderbird uses, it's updated whenever Firefox or Thunderbird is, and I don't have to deal with two separate programs. I've been using it for awhile now, and I like it.

[crazylegs]

I know when things go downhill when they say

"Oh, whilst you're here..."

Last time that happened someone handed me a purse with over £150 in notes and loose change, which entails this
Writing down how many of each note, then their serial numbers
for each denomination
coins, how many and how much
name, address DOB of finder
location, time and date of where found
and details of what the money is in (i.e. purse)

tens minutes later I was on my not so merry way.

[technical.angel]

I know when things go downhill when they say

"Oh, whilst you're here..."

The American version of that makes me want to learn Jedi mind tricks.

"I am not the techie you seek."

I always have to be really careful scheduling my work orders. Going over to Admissions means tacking on an extra half hour to hour to the task that I was going over to do. I'll end up taking care of three or four other issues they haven't decided to call in yet.

And do NOT get me started on their phone issues!

[Impetrix]

Whenever my boss goes over to admissions, he comes back very, very unhappy.

Sooooo glad we don't deploy student employees to deal with facstaff. They're bad enough on the phone, but as soon as they need somebody to come by, their problem is no longer my problem. Hurray!

[technical.angel]

And that's a huge on you!

[Geek King]

The American version of that makes me want to learn Jedi mind tricks.

I think the techie version goes, "Hey, Geek King! You're a computer guy, right? Well, I'm having this problem with my microwave..."
Or oven.
Or TV.
Or cuisenart.
Or Garden Weasal.

And when you protest that you know nothing about the object in question, "But I thought you knew about compuuuuters! Don't all these things have computers now?

[technical.angel]

Being a uni, I don't get many things like that. Gods know I usually can figure it out though, which doesn't help.

[lordlundar]

Ahem, back on topic:

"Ohhhh... I think I did a bad thing."

Usually coincides with (but not always)

"I opened up my computer to see how it works..."

This usually means several things:

1. You played with your computer innards.
2. You messed up the connections with no clue what you're doing.
3. You powered up said mess thinking it will work better.
4. You need a new computer.

[LoneWolf]

I usually get this when people call me at the store or come into the store:

'... I bought my cell phone here a while ago...'

It's not so bad when they say 'a year ago', since stuff can happen, but 'a week ago' usually indicates trouble.

Another classic one:

SC: 'It just stopped working' / 'I woke up and the display was broken' / etc...
Me: 'Ok, well we can have a look at if you like, you're welcome to bring it over here and <insert warranty blah blah> let us have a look at it'

And as soon as they come in you can see scratches on the phone or other clear evidence they fcked with it in such a way that the warranty/insurance doesn't cover it

[Captain Kidd]

I think the techie version goes, "Hey, Geek King! You're a computer guy, right? Well, I'm having this problem with my microwave..."
Or oven.
Or TV.
Or cuisenart.
Or Garden Weasal.

And when you protest that you know nothing about the object in question, "But I thought you knew about compuuuuters! Don't all these things have computers now?

My wife is a graphic artist. She had a cousin-in-law once ask, "since you're an artist, will you cut my hair?" My wife had a total wtf, does not compute moment. She had to have the cousin ask her again because it was such a non sequitur question.

[technical.angel]

"and ____ just mysteriously _____!"

I HATE the word mysteriously. The last one I got was "Everything was fine when I left last night, but when I got in this morning, a folder just mysteriously disappeared!"

AKA, as I was informed later, she had drug the folder into her sent items......

[technical.angel]

My wife is a graphic artist. She had a cousin-in-law once ask, "since you're an artist, will you cut my hair?"

"Sure! Just send the picture of yourself over, and I'll give you any hair style you want on it!"

[earl colby pottinger]

Don't forget

My wife is a graphic artist. She had a cousin-in-law once ask, "since you're an artist, will you cut my hair?" My wife had a total wtf, does not compute moment. She had to have the cousin ask her again because it was such a non sequitur question.

Just remember to remind her of this next she wants help for her or one of her friends for something oddball to your skills.