Dear Mrs. Blabbermouth:
You DO realize that I now have to report you to the police. Tampering with patients' medications is not just ILLEGAL, it's also UNSAFE!
Expect two or more officers at your door soon.
Sincerely,
Penny Cillin
Manager
Pharma-Mart
Dear Christmas-hating Judge:
I am appealing on behalf of my client, a Mrs. Christmas Freak, who was convicted on the charge of murder in the first degree of her neighbour, a Mr. Ebenezer Scrooge because of his vicious remarks about how Christmas should be outlawed.
My client insists that everything she did was done in self-defense, and that Mr. Scrooge had a terrible "accident" while attempting "murder" her with her own meat cleaver and wood chipper. She hid his remains in the turkey only because of her fear of "police brutality", which "unfortunately" for her, has come "true".
Also, because they "lied" in their testimony against her, my client will also be suing her former children for millions of dollars in damages.
Please reconsider her case.
Sincerely,
Holly Day
Attorney at Law
You DO realize that I now have to report you to the police. Tampering with patients' medications is not just ILLEGAL, it's also UNSAFE!
Expect two or more officers at your door soon.
Sincerely,
Penny Cillin
Manager
Pharma-Mart
Dear Christmas-hating Judge:
I am appealing on behalf of my client, a Mrs. Christmas Freak, who was convicted on the charge of murder in the first degree of her neighbour, a Mr. Ebenezer Scrooge because of his vicious remarks about how Christmas should be outlawed.
My client insists that everything she did was done in self-defense, and that Mr. Scrooge had a terrible "accident" while attempting "murder" her with her own meat cleaver and wood chipper. She hid his remains in the turkey only because of her fear of "police brutality", which "unfortunately" for her, has come "true".
Also, because they "lied" in their testimony against her, my client will also be suing her former children for millions of dollars in damages.
Please reconsider her case.
Sincerely,
Holly Day
Attorney at Law
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