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And so, RHPG's life takes another turn.

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  • And so, RHPG's life takes another turn.

    I'm going to try my best to keep this semi short, and put it in some semblance of order. Forgive me if it gets too long, or starts to make no sense.

    As many of you know, I came out of an abusive marriage last year, and recently applied to go back to Job Corps. I decided to go to Job Corps because the economy here hasn't been the greatest, so it's been rather difficult to find a job.

    However, this week, things have changed. Thursday, I went to my first counseling session. I've been feeling really depressed, and my moods have been everywhere, particularly bad since my son's birthday is coming up. The counselor gave me the option of going to a support group for abuse victims/survivors, gave me the dates and times, and set up another one on one appointment for us this week.

    So Monday I went to my first group therapy session, talked with many other women like myself, and ended up overwhelmed by their pain, added to my own. It is a very emotional, and very difficult, thing to do, walking into a room full of strangers and telling them that you let a man abuse you. This was the start of a very long night.

    When I got home, after having stopped on the way to throw up (stress does that to me), and having cried for around an hour after getting home, I talked to several friends. One of them is a fairly new friend of mine, at least in Real Time, as we've been kind of chatting online for a while now. It turned out that she knew where I was coming from, with my past abuse, and with the loss of my child, and was willing to help. She was not only willing, but wanted to help me find a job, get an apartment, get a lawyer, and get my son back. She even offered to drive me to Alabama to see my baby.

    When Sir got home from work, we sat down and had a very long talk. We've been trying to get into Job Corps now since about the beginning of January, and as some of you know, they've been jerking us around. Now remember what I said about why I chose to go to Job Corps. It is not the same reason that he chose to go. He wants to get into a new line of work, and for that needs training. He feels Job Corps is the way to go with that. So we talked. And we talked.. And we talked. For hours.

    We decided that right now, it would not be healthy for me to leave the solid support base that I have built here. Friends, people I now consider family, my support groups, and my one on one counseling, are very important - we both agreed - to the healing process. We also agreed that it would look better for me in the custody hearing if I did not make yet another big move so soon, and if I was paying my own rent, bills, etc.

    So now, I am staying in Louisville, the first place I've ever lived to truly feel like home to me, and the only place I've ever lived that I actually feel physically ill at the thought of leaving. I've got an interview with a staffing agency lined up, have another one to call tomorrow, and will be stopping by yet another one today. I'm also looking into efficiency rooms, in case Sir leaves before I've saved enough to get an apartment, but as a backup, I've got several people saying I can stay with them until I've got enough. I've got my resume out at at least 30 - 40 places, and am hoping for a call.

    No, we are not breaking up, we're not calling off the wedding. We're just taking separate paths to improve our individual lives, so that in about a year or so, when he's done with job corps, our life together can be better.

    I know, it got long and I said I'd try to keep it short, but there it is. Thank you for bearing with me, and for reading. I would appreciate comments or advice, if you've got it.

  • #2
    You're doing a wonderful job trying to turn your life around.

    My lovely lady, I applaud you.
    Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

    Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

    Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

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    • #3
      *hugs!* I hope it all works out.

      I think you guys have the right priorities in mind. It's always hard to be apart, but it will be really really good for you to stay (because of the support base you have).

      I'm here if you need an ear or digital hugs. I'm excited for the possibilities too.
      1129. I will refrain from casting Dimension Jump and Magnificent Mansion on every police box we pass.
      -----
      http://orchidcolors.livejournal.com (A blog about everything and nothing)

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      • #4
        I admire you very much for being so strong. I really hope things work out for the best and you are working hard, so I'm sure they will.

        I've heard that the job economy in Louisville is bad right now. I was going to move up there to live with family, but they said don't bother because there's no jobs.

        Good luck on the job hunt and I'm so glad that it seems you've found a strong support system. Good luck!

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        • #5
          I have no advice but I wish you the best of luck
          I don't go in for ancient wisdom
          I don't believe just 'cause ideas are tenacious
          It means that they're worthy - Tim Minchin, "White Wine in the Sun"

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          • #6
            It's true the job market is coming up with some pretty slim pickings. Unfortunately, with me having call center and office experience, McDonalds won't take me cause I'm over qualified, same with Walmart, the bastards... But I do have my resume in at a few places, and a friend of mine is talking to the owner of her company for me, both for a job, and a place to live, as he owns rentals.

            Thanks for the support guys I know that I always have a support base here and that means sooo much!

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            • #7
              Hang in there, kiddo. Best of luck to you.
              ~~ Every politician that opens their mouth on birth control only proves that we need more of it. ~~

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              • #8
                Welp, it looks like I have an interview tomorrow with an insurance company, an hour away by bus. I may call them back to cancel it if it looks like a scam. I'm not going through that crap again. I also have an interview tuesday with a staffing agency -sigh- Gods I need a job

                ETA: Well, the insurance place was a commission job... I just called and cancelled the interview. I can't afford to do commission only, and plus, i don't feel comfortable cold calling. Then there was this... -sigh-
                Last edited by SengaKitty; 03-26-2009, 06:30 PM.

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