Co-worker got suspeneded for giving supervisor the finger

[snugglegirl05]

I found out late last week that one of the baggers at the Kroger I work at was sent home and suspended for giving one of the supervisors the finger. That supervisor went to one of the Assistant Managers and told him what happened. So that Assistant Manager sent her home for the day, and she was given a couple of days suspension.

Why she did that I do not know.

She told me last year that she has Aspergers, but that should not be a reason for what she did.

[Pixelated]

I know zilch about such conditions, but I'm pretty sure that you still need to learn how to function in the world in general.

And I'm becoming increasingly skeptical of people who claim to have these conditions or other various illnesses (including physical). Self-diagnosis is SO easy, and with people looking up all kinds of "symptoms" on the internet, it's becoming increasingly common.

[mjr]

I know zilch about such conditions, but I'm pretty sure that you still need to learn how to function in the world in general.

And I'm becoming increasingly skeptical of people who claim to have these conditions or other various illnesses (including physical). Self-diagnosis is SO easy, and with people looking up all kinds of "symptoms" on the internet, it's becoming increasingly common.

As someone who is the parent of a child with diagnosed High-Functioning Autism (Aspergers is going away in the DSM), I can personally tell you that some (not all) people with Autism do struggle with social concepts and "social convention". There's a LOT of coaching that goes into it. Sometimes even that's not enough, because each person with Autism has their own meltdown triggers, and sometimes it's a matter of either people around the Autistic person recognizing them, or the Autistic person themselves recognizing them. But then the person must step away, and sometimes they can't. It's possible that's what this was, and the person hadn't developed a "coping" mechanism for it yet. Sometimes it's a "maturity" thing, too.

snugglegirl05:

I guess the question I would ask is what was the situation? What were the events that led to the bagger giving the finger to the supervisor? That could be some helpful information.

Does this bagger have a support system? Do you know someone who is friends with them or a relative of theirs? If you PM me, I can send you to a "support" type website that might be helpful.

[Kristev]

Unless your co-worker had developed giving the finger as a response or had been obsesssing about it for hours, it's probably not related to Asperger's. (I happen to have it.)

The problem is probably closer to building, pent-up frustration. Or change issued too loudly and too quickly.

Social cues and expectations are something autistics struggle with, at varying levels. But giving the finger is less likely than either a complete meltdown or a complete withdrawl into their own mind, unless she misunderstood how inappropriate the gesture was.

[Food Lady]

But then the person must step away, and sometimes they can't.

You pretty much never can in the service industry.

[Mr Hero]

Relevant

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F7SNEdjftno

[scruff]

She told me last year that she has Aspergers, but that should not be a reason for what she did.

My sympathy is with the bagger. If the supervisor pushed their buttons on a bad day, especially if it's someone who's poor at noticing tone/body language, it could have been the last straw for the bagger.

A one-off giving the finger is the same as a one-off loud swear (in my neighbourhood, anyway) - the supervisor should have backed off or given a verbal warning. To escalate a one-off situation is a sign of poor management.

[Pixelated]

To escalate a one-off situation is a sign of poor management.

Absolutely. Regardless of what conditions or syndromes any employee might or might not have.

I think I'm seeing something like this developing at my retail job. At least I can leave quickly. Some can't. I hate to think what they're going to have to put up with, until they can get out.

[protege]

So that Assistant Manager sent her home for the day, and she was given a couple of days suspension.

Where I work, she'd be thanking her lucky stars that all she got was sent home and a suspension. I can guarantee that if I did that to my supervisor, I'd be coldly told to "pack my shit, and get the fuck out." Why? Because we have clients who come in every so often, and the company demands a "professional" atmosphere.

[Rosco the Iroc]

I like to tell people that my hand wants to, but can't hit them so badly that it has an hard on when I give them the finger.