Hire me, dawg!

[Jadedcarguy]

I took a few overflow calls from the retail counter today. I really dislike doing this, but since I'm a team player at heart, I gave in. I should have stopped at two.

The first two calls were normal parts calls, i.e. "I drive this, this part is broken, do you have it" types. But call three, how I hate thee. I've lost count of the ways.


Me: Possessing a full vocabulary

UT: Unemployed Thug


Me: Parts, can I help you?

UT: Yo, y'all hirin'?

Me: Not that I'm aware of, but you're welcome to come in and fill out an application. (I am NOT in HR, by the way)

UT: What kinda jobs y'all got up in there?

Me: Like I said, I don't know of any open positions right now. Come in and fill out an app if you'd like. If anything becomes available, they may call you.

UT: Yo, Yo, I need a job today 'n' shit. What y'all pay up in there? (I really should have ended the call here, but I'm apparently a masochist)

Me: That depends on what you do here. It varies widely.

UT: Well, what they payin' you 'n' shit?

Me: I'm not telling you that. Come in and fill out an app if you're interested. I don't do the hiring.

UT: Y'all no help. Sheeeiiiit. <click>


Yeah, I'm really sorry but we don't have any positions open for pimpin' and poppin' caps, dawg.


Would any of you hire this clown?

[myswtghst]

I....just...wow.

And it's not masochism, it's enjoying the fact that you are SO FAR mentally superior to this person, and being entertained by their idiocy.

[Peppergirl]

Would any of you hire this clown?

I would.
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If I was a criminal and wanted someone whacked.

[myswtghst]

If I was a criminal and wanted someone whacked.

Or possibly for some job that involved public humiliation, or...um...me hitting him with something everytime he said any of those phrases.

[Jadedcarguy]

If I was a criminal and wanted someone whacked.

I'd rather hire someone to have him whacked, removing him from the gene pool.



Oh bloody hell, I'll bet he's already spread his seed.

[Peppergirl]

Oh bloody hell, I'll bet he's already spread his seed.

Prolly has 5 kids, and an equal number of baby mommas.

[myswtghst]

Oh bloody hell, I'll bet he's already spread his seed.

What's even more frightening is that you know the mother of his baby can't be terribly bright either, if she slept with him.

[Jadedcarguy]

What's even more frightening is that you know the mother of his baby can't be terribly bright either, if she slept with him.

There seems to be an epidemic of that around here.........




On a brighter note, I mentioned this call to some of the techs, and they latched onto the "up in there" part of this guys vernacular. For the rest of the day, parts was referred to as "up in the club". That may stick.

[Peppergirl]

"Yo, yo! Go hit up Jaded up in 'da club. He be 'da dude with the ghey salad, man!"

[ArenaBoy]

M: Yours truly.

T: Thug type.


T: MAN! Why you ain't lettin me through here?! This is bullshit!

M: Company policy.

T: Come on, don't be a dick just let me the fuck through!

M: Nope.

T: Come on, I pay to come here!! Can you speak English or what?

M: Yes, but I don't speak moron.

Loved working chains.

[Jadedcarguy]

"Yo, yo! Go hit up Jaded up in 'da club. He be 'da dude with the ghey salad, man!"

Word.


I just now realized that if this guy had talked to the wash bay manager, he probably would have been hired on the spot judging by some of the miscreants they've got back there. Consequently, they're the reason I lock my car in the employee lot.

[AKWalMartCartGuy]

On a brighter note, I mentioned this call to some of the techs, and they latched onto the "up in there" part of this guys vernacular.

now you've got that one "y'all gonn make me lose my mind, up in here, up in here" song stuck in my head

[Bright_Star]

That's fine if you talk slang BUT when calling up & asking about a possible job then that's NOT the time for it. So if you're serious about a job then you have to act serious .
Or in other words-"if yall want da gig then yo shit gots to be tight!"...LMAO!

[tropicsgoddess]

wow....no way would I hire that dude.

[powerboy]

I would not hire him. If I was to hire anyone, they would have to actually talk right.