A Very Awkward Situation. [Very long, I'm afraid but important]

[LibraryLady]

To put it mildly, my Department Head and I have had a rocky relationship. Sometimes, she sees me as a knowedgable ally and true asset to the workplace. Other times, she regards me as she would would a wad of chewing gum under her shoe.

Now, we're in a bad, bad time. Even though our offices are only 25 ft away, she will only speak to me through emails and those emails are a bit odd. I have received a stern warning about making sure I clean up my coffee spills in the office microwave. I thought that strange because I have not used the office microwave for at least 4 years. I have also received Emails about my sneezing. It's said to be excessively loud. A sneeze is a hard thing to control. You get the idea.

At the end of the month there will be the annual luncheon to honor staff members who have worked in the institution for 20 years. In the good days I looked forward to this luncheon. I don't look forward to it now.

We are supposed to attend this luncheon with our Department Heads and I know that, for at least the time being, my Department Head hates me. She has made no bones about her agenda to get me out. She has said that it would be to the benefit of the Library if I was found to have Altzheimers or a brain tumor so that she can turf me out on Disabillity. I've consulted physicians. They all say I'm perfectly sane.

I'm in a hard place. I want to enjoy the Luncheon. I can't do it when my Department Head is there like a condor perching on my shoulder and watching my every move.

Do I really want to go to this Luncheon and enjoy a good meal? Yes, I do.

Do I really want to go to this Luncheon in the company of a woman who wants to get rid of me? I don't think I do.

Great People of CS. What would you do in this sort of situation?

[Becks]

When she made that comment, did she say it to your face or in an email?

Either way, is there someone above her that you could've told about that?

[Andara Bledin]

Is there any way you can go to the luncheon and not interact with the department head at all?

Has she said any of those hateful comments in email? It seriously sounds like she's got some mental issue, and it might be her that needs to get "turfed out on disability."

^-.-^

[marasbaras]

Start documenting .... while I normally disagree with most of the claims of "hostile work environment" here. This is a real one.

Keep a log of everything like this she says. Print out e-mails. Etc.

[Rapscallion]

If you have an electronic paper trail via email, go to your HR department and say this has continued over time, is stressing you out, and that you consider it harassment. If they have anything about them, sit back and watch the fireworks.

Rapscallion

[thehippie777]

I agree with everyone else, save the emails & then turn them into HR. You have obviously been around awhile, so the hurassment is completely rediculous.

[IT Grunt]

Definitely print out those emails and cart them to HR. I had a similar situation myself years back. This manager was, to put it bluntly, helicoptered to his position just a month after being hired. Once he achieved his lofty position, he became a soulless taskmaster, and quite abusive. Not only did he abuse me to my face, but he also did it in email, a grave mistake on his part. When I printed them out, I had at least 150 pages worth of bile. I took that entire stack to the head of HR, and laid it on her desk before her. "Remember how I've been complaining about the treatment I've been receiving from my boss? Read that."

Her jaw nearly hit the floor as she started reading, and she nearly flipped. "Nobody treats our employees that way!" was the battle cry, and the fireworks began. I ended up getting an apology out of it, which felt pretty good, and also felt pretty vindicating. Document, Document, Document, and pretty soon you can nail her to the wall.

[LibraryLady]

Thank you all. The comment about my mind was, unfortunately not recorded. That was in our last private 'chats' before she virtually stopped speaking to me.

[Boozy]

I have also received Emails about my sneezing. It's said to be excessively loud. A sneeze is a hard thing to control.

That's absurd.

I don't think you should miss an event that you were looking forward to because of this bitch. Go, have fun, hold your head high. Ignore her.

And yes, keep the e-mails. Get a nice paper trail of her vindictiveness, then go to HR.

[PuckishOne]

The comment about my mind was, unfortunately not recorded.

From my brief stint in HR I can say that the e-mail regarding the sneezing is just as damning, as is anything else of that ilk (which I imagine she's also managed to produce). As the others said, document - send copies to your personal e-mail account if you feel they could be compromised. I think you know that it's just a matter of time before she commits herself in writing to one statement too many, and then you can go forth with your complaint.

On a more personal note, that comment about your mental state was completely ridiculous...methinks there may be a bit of projection on her part there. No one should have to put up with that sort of crap, and you have my sympathies, FWIW.