Berfday

[karath]

This is a kind of random post...but I felt it needed a home somewhere it would be appreciated, so here goes.

A co-worker (G), who very recently joined Wendy's, has done very little to mark her as a positive point at the job, even despite the fact that employees are in very short supply. In G's case, most of my interaction with her involves her speaking to me like a little child that's either stupid or mentally retarded, then looking shocked when I respond in a less than pleasant manner with a shit-eating grin on my face.

Recently, G invited me, her 21 year old, bitter, collegiate co-worker to her brother's 15th birthday party (please note I've never met the brat). At the time I was unable to think of a suitably diplomatic way to say "no way in hell," but figured I would just blow it off.

Then she decided to take saturday off. A day that she was well aware one cashier would be missing (he'd asked for the day off several weeks in advance) and that I would be late or missing, to boot (see the off topic post I'll be writing after this). By the time I arrived, the manager, sandwich prep girl, and cashier were very overworked and pissed off...you can imagine how that made MY day. Didn't help that thanks to a new furniture store opening right across the street from us we're doing a LOT more business on weekends...which is a good thing unless you only have 3 people on duty.

G was already in pretty deep shit with the weekend manager before this, so I'm looking forward to the verbal tongue-lashing I'll get to bear witness to today. So G has now gone beyond a mere annoyance and has now graduated to the fresh, much-needed driving force behind my urgent leaving of Wendy's.

In conclusion, I'm now looking for a CREATIVE way to tell G to go to hell should she bring up the birthday party this week. I'm putting my trust in you folks!

[Akasa]

I'll have to think on that. Its 5am and I haven't seen sleep yet.
You want her to know she's been told to go to hell right?

[karath]

Yes, please. I want to be more subtle than just "you screwed me over, go to hell" but not so subtle that she doesn't realize the insult.

[iradney]

You haul out your diary, page to the day of the party and say "Oh, I'm SO sorry, but I'm scheduled to have rabid chihuahua's chew on my nipples on that day"

[karath]

Hmm...I'd definitely enjoy seeing the reaction to that one! May have a variation or two (mostly since I've utterly failed at keeping a diary in the past ) but I likes me the sound of that!

[iradney]

You could also say "Oh dear, I'm planning on knitting my intestines into a vest...."

And yes, I actually use those when I don't want to do something.
The reactions are interesting especially when said as deadpan and seriously as humanly possible

[Pedersen]

How about this? "I'm so sorry I can't make it. I've got these terrible corns on my feet from working in an understaffed fast food restaurant, and no medical insurance, and that's the first day I can try to do something about. I was planning on spending the day in tears while using a cheese grater to remove them."

[rvdammit]

If I had my druthers I'd go scuba with concrete flippers.

[Arm]

"I'm sorry, but I think I'm scheduled to be on fire that day."

That one's like the others, best when delivered deadpan and generally sort of makes them stop and go 'huh?'

If you go with subtle, chances are she'll miss it entirely, which isn't necessarily bad...

"Nah, I've been spending a lot of time at work lately, so I'd really rather just relax at home alone for once. Thanks anyway"

Or,

"Sorry, I've just been really tired lately, so I'm just going to spend the day at home relaxing."

[lordlundar]

"Oh gee, I can't. You see, I promised to cover at <random location> for some moronic, selfish, ignorant, STUPID BITCH WHO CAN'T DO A DAMN THING RIGHT! But then, you wouldn't know anything about that situation, as you've never been on the receiving end of such an incident, have you?"

Heck, if you're gonna drive the point in, make sure it hurts.

[PepperElf]

or... the simple "No."

Wait for her to start bothering you with "whyyyyyy" and then tell her, "I can't f*ing stand you." all with a cheery tone of course

[karath]

knew there was a reason I liked you guys

I don't think it quite sank in (sadly enough) but when she pressed me earlier this week I informed her I was scheduled to be attacked by rabid weasels and wouldn't be able to make it. The absolute look on her face lasted me the rest of the day

And lucky me, she's given me a chance at a second helping of vengeance already...she decided to take ANOTHER day off when we were short-staffed again. This time she gets to be written up for it; I'm now making a point of coming in early tomorrow so I can catch her as soon as she comes in.

My current plan is to ask how she's doing; whether it's good or bad, I then inform her it's about to get worse, <normally very happy manager> is pissed at her. After that the conversation should flow rather smoothly; what do you guys think? Any thoughts/suggestions?

[Geek King]

My current plan is to ask how she's doing; whether it's good or bad, I then inform her it's about to get worse, <normally very happy manager> is pissed at her. After that the conversation should flow rather smoothly; what do you guys think? Any thoughts/suggestions?

Hopefully not too late, but I wouldn't tell her at all. One, it might be against company policy. Two, it makes you look like you're in middle school. Seriously chilish. You get a much better feeling of satisfaction from it being a total surprise, and you don't look like an ass for rubbing her face in it.