Question for the checkout people...

[fireheart]

Do you guys treat your registers as living things?

We don't name them at work, but occasionally I'll joke around with my customers about the register when it chooses to malfunction, saying things like...

"The receipt machine is hungry" (when it eats the machine)
"It had one too many last night and is now hungover" (when the register takes it time processing EFTPOS)
"The coins must be sticky" (When the drawer refuses to open)
"They're fighting at the moment (when the scale doesn't read)

I think I've been working there too long....

[Megg]

Always. At every place I ever worked, I personified the registers. It really seemed to me they had personalities though. At Toxic Hell, we had a cc machine in the drive through that was the bane of my existence. She was so picky. I sweet-talked her, and most of the time, it worked. "C'mon sweetie! You can do it!" Customers thought it was funny, usually. Sometimes, though, she would get belligerent and I would have to threaten to throw her out the window before she would work. Yes, it was a girl. Yes, I am sure.

[bean]

"The receipt machine is hungry" (when it eats the machine)
"It had one too many last night and is now hungover" (when the register takes it time processing EFTPOS)
"The coins must be sticky" (When the drawer refuses to open)
"They're fighting at the moment (when the scale doesn't read)

I've gotta remember these.

Our registers are pretty reliable, with a couple of exceptions. 2 of them get bitchy about opening the drawers when they go a long time without being rebooted, they'll refuse to open at all or take a long, long time to open. Every now and then one of them will pop up the lovely Windows blue screen of death - thankfully so far none of them have done it mid-transaction, they've done it immediately after closing the drawer a few times and at random while nothing is going on, but usually only if we go several months without a power outage or a reboot. (They run Windows XP Embedded with custom NCR software on top of it)

Every now and then our EFT takes FOREVER though. Normally it's nearly instant (1-2 seconds to authorize a card, we do it over satellite with fallback to DSL). When both systems go down it sucks, we can't do debit at all and credit takes about 20 seconds (the register just approves it and stores it in hopes it can be forced through later).

[SG15Z]

sorta, I do it more with the SCO machines since those actually talk to yeah. Like, "She just wants some loving," or something weird like that. We have yet to name our registers, but I've always wanted to, you know for the lulz.

[CoffeeMonkey]

I anthopomorphize most things.

When my phone is out of charge or my car is low on gas, they are hungry. They wish to be fed. My car has a name, and she is a girl car. The places where things belong at work are where they live. They syrups live on that shelf. Computers and registers act up because they are cranky. Objects are happy or sad depending on the circumstances. It's fun.

[jedimaster91]

No registers at my job, but I do the same thing with the computers at work. I've been known to beg, plead, cajole, poke, prod, and threaten the computers when they misbehave.

[Elspeth]

all my electronics have been treated like a person, nothing named though. The printer is hungry when it wants more paper.

And never speak badly of the car because she will act up.

[bean]

And never speak badly of the car because she will act up.

My car is the opposite.

I was bragging that it's never been in the shop for anything but oil changes and the 105k mile service since I've owned it the other day. Go Honda! I haven't even had to do the brakes in the 3 years I've owned it, and it's on the original clutch.

Today it started dying every time I put in the clutch, or the idle would drop so low the tach was basically on 0 and the oil/alternator lights were flickering.

It's done the low idle crap before and my mechanic (who's been working on nothing but Honda for over 30 years) can't figure it out, but it didn't die.

(2001 Honda Accord LX 5 speed manual with the 2.3L 4 cylinder, purchased with 82k miles 3 years ago, currently at 109k miles)

I have been known to talk to the registers when debit/credit is running sluggish - if "Processing" stays on my screen more than 5 seconds I'll tell the customer "It's in a bad mood and running slow, sorry."

My newest gripe about our printers though - actually our paper - our receipt paper has stopped coming to us with pink stripes or any kind of visual warning that it's about to run out, and our printers don't have a low paper sensor or anything. When it runs out in the middle of a receipt, the register locks up and says "PAPER OUT". You put more paper in, then the printer spits out a bunch of garbage for the next few transactions. I usually just do a few reprints until it starts working right.

[Hobbs]

I once shocked a customer (and myself) by cursing my register in Russian. Well...broken Russian at least.

All our registers seem to be a chip short of a byte...and we're the only store that doesn't have the touch-screens in my city >.<

[Boggles]

I do that with the lottery terminal. When it's slow then it's just thinking about it or it's just finding a better set of numbers.

And i have been known to threaten the EPOS with a screwdriver before now.

[Skeksin]

Electromagnets.