*bleeping!* robocallers

[sirwired]

The number of robocalls I get seems to be rising lately; I'm up to about four a day, but I get too many legit calls that I must answer right away to screen my calls.

It really bothers me that those fuckers simply Do. Not. Give. A. Shit. about the law (I think by the time a human picks up the phone, they are up to four law violations... once they answer it and refuse to answer a standard checklist of questions, they are up to about ten); I'm completely and utterly powerless to track them down and they know it. And even if they were to get caught, the penalties for utterly ignoring the rather large stack of laws consist of giving up the money they haven't yet shipped offshore and promising to Go Forth and Sin No More. (This is about as effective as you'd think; the FTC telemarketer recidivism rate is rather high...) The penalty for getting caught a second time is the life-ending charge of... Contempt. Yeah, that'll show 'em!

[Jay 2K Winger]

Since I have a cell phone, I don't get these all that often. Then again, I have my phone shut off and left in the car when I'm at work, so maybe they try to call me up, get my voicemail, and just cross me off their list after the umpteenth time trying to reach me.

There was one time, though, when I answered a phone call... and just heard a beep on the other end. No response to my "Hello?" Just "Beep..........Beep.........Beep" and so on. I hung up. Five minutes later, same number, same response. I hung up again. Five minutes later, I answered, said nothing, and heard the beeping, so I hung up and ignored any further calls from that number. Hasn't happened again, so.

[MoonCat]

All I have are cell phones (house phone and my personal phone) and the house phone gets these all the time. It's gotten so when the phone rings I look at the display. If it's not a local area code, I don't answer. They never leave voicemails. I've looked up the numbers online and according to other people who also get calls from these same numbers, they're all scammers.

[MadMike]

I was getting a lot of those "Card Services" scammers for awhile. I don't get a whole lot of those anymore, but now it's the power service scammers. Sometimes they leave a message, sometimes they don't. I didn't realize how many of those I was getting until they remodeled my department at work, and during the remodel we got to work from home for two months. The name that would show up was always something that looked suspicious, including the one time, it showed up as "Retension Department." Someone needs to learn how to spell AND get a job.

Sometimes I would just pick up and hang up right away. Other times, I would hit the speakerphone button and just not say anything. Maybe one of these times, I'll actually answer it, and do my best "Consuela" impression -- "Hola? No, Meester Mike no home... no, no..."

My son got one of those a couple weeks ago, and he decided to play with the guy. He transferred the caller to his "secretary." My son does a hilarious impression of a frustrated foreigner who barely speaks or understands English.

[Pixilated]

Oooh, MadMike, I love your son's solution! My Grandpa used to do something similar, although with his heavy German accent, he didn't have to pretend to be a foreigner ... not to mention his penchant for making up stories on the spot. (He told one scammer he didn't have any money ... when the guy asked how he managed to eat, he said when he's hungry he walks along the highway picking up pop and beer bottles ... after about five minutes of this the scammer gave up.)

I don't have caller ID so I let pretty much 100% of the incoming calls go to the answering machine. Sometimes I'll wander out to the living room and wait by the phone to see who's on the other end; if it's someone I know, I'll pick the phone up while they're still relaying the message .

[TheSHAD0W]

There was one time, though, when I answered a phone call... and just heard a beep on the other end. No response to my "Hello?" Just "Beep..........Beep.........Beep" and so on. I hung up. Five minutes later, same number, same response. I hung up again. Five minutes later, I answered, said nothing, and heard the beeping, so I hung up and ignored any further calls from that number.

That was a fax machine calling you, and they'll often automatically retry a few times if they can't establish a connection the first time. Of course the dumbass who sent the fax didn't stick around to listen to it and see if a person answered the phone instead.

[caitsith2]

Had a couple of windows support scammer calls. First one was the usual event viewer warnings type scammer. The second one, was asking if I had paid for their service. Trolled both of them using a virtual machine. I want to troll more of them, but it seems they aren't calling anymore. I wonder why.

(The one that does the "Did you buy our service" type, goes through asking for details, so that they can "refund" your card. Except that they actually put a charge on the card instead, equal to the "refund" amount.)

[PepperElf]

this is why I primarily use skype and google voice.
cos both have the option to block numbers. and on GV if i block someone they get the "three tone out of service" message thingy.

[Mr Hero]

Greetings, friends. Do you wish to look as happy as me? Well, you've got the power inside you right now. So, use it, and send one dollar to Happy Dude, 742 Evergreen Terrace, Springfield. Don't delay, eternal happiness is just a dollar away.

[Jetfire]

I have a landline and a cellphone, but since I'm a bachelor, I ignore the landline completely (everyone knows to call my cell now). Sadly, the only calls I get are the automated i-Cor canada ones, so I can't even play with the scammer. *sigh*

[KatherineB]

I have to say, after reading this story on Not Always I have started leaving a pile of books next to the phone and reading them at random to people who call. Just read. Don't stop. Don't let them interrupt. Begin the call with 'Ooh, storytime' and measure how far you get before they end the call. It's like a competition! Which person will let you get beyond the first page? It's great fun! (And it improves your reading aloud skills...)

[PepperElf]

ooo I love it!

It's diabolical without being harmful.

although so far the funniest one I've seen was over at another "not always" site where the person answering the phone was a former telemarketer. From the same business model. With the same script.

And started reciting the script along with the caller.
(I'm betting that one really weirded out the caller too!)

[mhkohne]

I have to say, after reading this story on Not Always I have started leaving a pile of books next to the phone and reading them at random to people who call. Just read. Don't stop. Don't let them interrupt. Begin the call with 'Ooh, storytime' and measure how far you get before they end the call. It's like a competition! Which person will let you get beyond the first page? It's great fun! (And it improves your reading aloud skills...)

There are no words for how awesome this is.

[Zaiida]

Had a couple of windows support scammer calls. First one was the usual event viewer warnings type scammer. The second one, was asking if I had paid for their service. Trolled both of them using a virtual machine. I want to troll more of them, but it seems they aren't calling anymore. I wonder why.

(The one that does the "Did you buy our service" type, goes through asking for details, so that they can "refund" your card. Except that they actually put a charge on the card instead, equal to the "refund" amount.)

I'm getting the windows scam calls out the wazoo at the moment. Then I started getting calls for Mrs Smith. No Mrs or Smith here. Tuns out my number with the Do not call registry had lapsed oops.

I love having a home phone not under my name. It makes it much easier the filter out the cold callers. Plus people who don't know me mispronounce my name. Weird European spelling does have benefits

I am getting fed up with the robo calls after 8pm though or one after the other

[mjr]

I have to say, after reading this story on Not Always I have started leaving a pile of books next to the phone and reading them at random to people who call. Just read. Don't stop. Don't let them interrupt. Begin the call with 'Ooh, storytime' and measure how far you get before they end the call. It's like a competition! Which person will let you get beyond the first page? It's great fun! (And it improves your reading aloud skills...)

What's the farthest you've gotten?

EDIT: Most. Awesome. Telemarketing. Fight. Back. Technique. EVER!!!