You work here and I demand service!

[Mongo Skruddgemire]

Now at first glance, that title would imply that I was not giving the customer the service that I am supposed to provide as a retail sales associate. But the story is here because I am no longer a retail sales associate.

This past December I was fortunate to find employment in the IT field making good money and no longer having to deal with sucky customers. Working in the help desk of a hospital I have to deal with "my interweb is broken" and other stupidities, but no real suckyness.

Before this wonderful job I worked briefly at Advance Auto Parts. I left on good terms and everything was groovy. Recently I had to come back to the store as a customer to get a replacement bulb for my van.

So I go in and I start looking up my bulb and someone I knew as a customer when I worked there came up to me and asked if I would look up something for them. Oh damn...I'm wearing a red polo shirt.

I tried to politely inform them that I didn't work there and could no longer look up stuff for him when he totally flipped right the fark out.

SC - Why this site exists
Me -
Man - Manager and former boss

SC - Do not give me that crap you little faggot! You work here and I demand you give me the service I deserve!

Me - (Faggot? Little?) Not that it's any of your business I am not homosexual and I'm taller than you by a clear foot....

SC - Oh! Threatening me are you? That's it! I'm getting your boss! I'm going to have you fired. In this economy you should have been glad you had a fucking job. Now you're going to be fired and have to live on the streets and starve while I drive around in my Corvette and laugh at your ass.

Me - Fine. Get my boss. Feel free to make a fool of yourself. I'll be right here waiting and I go back to looking for my bulb.

SC - Don't you turn your back on me you faggot or I'll...

Me - (turning around) Or you're going to do what? You want a threat? Here's a threat! Touch me and you're going through the window headfirst.

Man - Mongo! What the hell is going on here?

SC - This employee of yours refused to help me! He threatened to throw me out the window! He's a rude faggot that needs to be fired.

Man - I can't fire him, he...

SC - YES YOU CAN FIRE HIM!!!!ELEVENTY!!!

Man - He quit in December. He does not work here.

SC - Uhm

Man - And frankly if he did work here I'd still not fire him since you threatened him first and called him a faggot several times. I don't tolerate that from my customers.

SC - But he threatened to throw me out a window...

Man - Yes I heard, if you touched him. Honestly if he does, that's on his own account. Being that he no longer one of my employees, I can not stop him from pounding you into goo.

SC - But...

Man - But nothing. Leave now.

Sc - hangs head in shame and leaves

Me - Can you ring me out?

Man - Sure. No discount though.

Me - Damn!

M

[PepperElf]

pwnage!

[Apathy]

What an utter jackass.
Now he can drive around in his corvette and feel like the tool he is.

[lordlundar]

Me - Can you ring me out?

Man - Sure. No discount though.

Me - Damn!

Ah well, worth a shot.

[freaktard]

Ever since I quit my job at Sears, I've been hoping something like that would happen whenever I went back to go shopping. Sadly, it never has.

[Drakstern]

I used to get that at the grocery store I worked at all the time.

And at other grocery stores.

And in one amusing case, Best Buy.

I still haven't figured that last one out.

[Automan Empire]

Why is it always a LITTLE faggot?

When I wear my navy blue mechanic uniform to the auto parts superstore, I get people thinking I work there, which is understandable. But WHY, at Best Buy, Home Depot, or even the supermarket? And, why give ME the cat butt face when I say I don't work here.

[Jack Doe]

Awesome story Mongo, and your former boss sounds like he rocks too.

[CrazedClerkthe2nd]

I once walked into a Best Buy, not really noticing I happened to be wearing a blue polo and khakis that day...oops. I got stopped 3 times.

[KorporateKitty]

Awesome! That f*cktard was put in his place.

I could never understand why people sometimes think I work in a store I'm shopping in...when I am walking around with a purse, and sometimes coat. And no nametag, etc. It use to happen at Hot Topic a lot. And then when I *am at work wearing an apron and nametag, I always get, "Do you work here?"

Sigh.

[tropicsgoddess]

Epic WIN!!!! Time to cue to Nelson Muntz laugh on that SC....HA ha!!!

[protege]

What an utter jackass.
Now he can drive around in his rolling penis extension and feel like the tool he is.

Edited for my amusement
Still, I do find it interesting that a tool, needs another tool, because his um... tool doesn't measure up

Seriously, the guy's Corvette doesn't impress me. Maybe if it was something like a Jensen Interceptor, an MG K3, 1930s "Blower" Bentley, etc. I'd have some respect...

[sms001]

And in one amusing case, Best Buy.
I still haven't figured that last one out.

Not just you, and not just Best Buy. In Mongo's case there was a real identification of him as an employee. But I wondered long and hard about why so many of us seem to get approached in other stores no matter what we are wearing. The answer seems remarkably simple once I figured it out - we aren't exuding an air of cluelessness, therefore we are employees.

Seriously. Most of us here have a little more awareness than your average SC. We read signs, we are aware of our environment, we think. To an SC meandering brain dead through life and the corner store, this SCREAMS 'works here.' I mean, why would we be paying attention to our surroundings if we weren't being paid to do it?

That aura of awareness, and a good deal of familiarity with the stores eventually led me to just help the poor lost souls out on occasion. I'd be on the clock and scrounging parts at Lowes/Menards/Home Depot and get the "Hey, do you know where....." After a while I realized it took LESS time to take them there than to drive it into their skulls that I wasn't an employee. My boss wins, (Two fold - less time and possible good PR if they DO realize I work elsewhere.) I win by getting out faster, and the SC wins by getting what they want when they want it, damn the circumstances!

[ditchdj]

I'm purely shocked that buttplug didn't run to the cops and "Cry Victim" and get you arrested for "menacing". Some dickhead at the Wendy's I worked at tried to pull the same shit on me. Mr. Big Man with his oversized 4x4 staring me down with a burly officer standing next to him. What a major tool.

[Ironclad Alibi]

Seriously. Most of us here have a little more awareness than your average SC. We read signs, we are aware of our environment, we think. To an SC meandering brain dead through life and the corner store, this SCREAMS 'works here.' I mean, why would we be paying attention to our surroundings if we weren't being paid to do it?

You mean SCs are like zombies wanting our brains? I'd better start reading World War Z so I know what to do when they attack.