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A little background is necessary so please bear with me.
About three years ago I suffered a series of severe asthma attacks that eventually led to me being hospitalized. For two months I struggled to breathe 24/7 thanks to my immune system taking a vacation during cold season. At the end of this time when I was coming out of the worst of it I began having agonizing pain in my legs. Since I have a very high pain tolerance and a stoic disposition I ignored it until it literally became so bad I could barely walk, even with a cane.
Diagnosing the problem took several more months but eventually it was learned that the prednisone giving to me to help me breathe had triggered a reaction call Avascular Necrosis (a disease that literally caused parts of the bones in my knee to die). I was and am extremely lucky that it limited itself to one joint, and that I was able to stop the prednisone before it progressed furthur. However in the meantime the excruiciating pain of the bone death had caused yet another response called Chronic Regional Pain Syndrome.
Which basically means that the pain overloaded my nerves and sent them into an endless pain loop that nothing short of directly numbing the nerves themselves can help.
Through two years of treatments, therapy and hard work I managed to go from being unable to bear weight or tolerate any touch (CRPS makes skin hypersensitive to the point even water or strong air hurt) to being able to walk and appear normal for the most part. I still have pain, and thanks to several sever sports related injuries to that leg from high school I am likely to being in a fair amount of pain for the rest of my life (my ankle is comparable to that of a 80 year old with osteoporosis and arthiritis; several people on my medical team have expressed suprise that I am able to walk on it at all).
So the point of all this sharing is that even without taking my severe asthma and enviomental allergies into account I am still quite authentically "disabled". Getting in and out of cars is hard for me, as well as doing to much walking so in order to keep my pain from becoming so bad I can;t do anything I use a handicap placard. Apparently this is a problem seeing as I am only 25.
On to the incident~
My mom and i traveled into the city to go to a doctor's appointment and on the way out we decided to swing by Arby's for lunch. I made my way to the door alone while my mom stepped off the property to have a cigarette. Approaching the door at the same time as an elderly couple I genially held the door for them.
As he was passing through the door the old man semi turned and distastefully muttered "Ugh parking in a handicap space. Hmph!".
Reigning in my temper I calmly replied, "You know I can produce my disability credentials."
He probably assumed that two young females (my mom looks like a 20 year old) wouldn't have the gall to confront his passive aggressive sniping.
Now keep in mind I in no way threatened him, nor made any conscious attempt to intimidate him. However, unconsciously when I become riled I tend to exhibit a predatory focus that unnerves people (and for good reason because when attacked or threatened I descend into a deep rage that deprives me of conscious control of my actions, resulting in people becoming hurt very badly). If you have ever seen a German Shepard or Doberman go from friendly dog to an alert, focused predator, that is what my demeanor becomes like.
The couple had at this point continued to walk away from me, and I was content to let things go in order to avoid losing my temper, but the man just could not let it be. As he was walking away, he calls back to me, "That's not how things seem."
Argh. Self-control won and I retreated to my calm place filled with fluffy animals and shiny things. Once sure I was not going to chew through his jugular (hey mom always said I can think/fantasize whatever I want as long as I don't do it ><) I replied "Yeah well things aren't always what they seem, now are they?".
All this time they had been walking to ahead of me to the counter area, the same direction I happened to be going. Now other than having my temper aroused and being predatory focused on them to asses the level of threat they represented, I had done nothing other than reply to them in the above exchange.
Still, while they remained blessedly silent at this point they started acting mortally afraid of me. Which created a very wierd experience for the cashier who looked unsure of what had happened other than the couple had pissed me off somehow and now they were cowering. Great.
Lemme tell ya that was a wonderful lunch. Especially on a day when I was already feeling horrible and in a great deal of pain already.
Oh and the couple was indeed lucky they had chosen to snipe at me while my mom was gone. You see moms have a very strong instinctive reaction when their "baby", especially their sick "baby" is threatened.
In the entire scheme of things it was only a brief encounter, but having worked so hard to try and function and get through each day it really bothered me. Like it isn't hard enough being a half crippled 25 year old without having people harass me in public places.
About three years ago I suffered a series of severe asthma attacks that eventually led to me being hospitalized. For two months I struggled to breathe 24/7 thanks to my immune system taking a vacation during cold season. At the end of this time when I was coming out of the worst of it I began having agonizing pain in my legs. Since I have a very high pain tolerance and a stoic disposition I ignored it until it literally became so bad I could barely walk, even with a cane.
Diagnosing the problem took several more months but eventually it was learned that the prednisone giving to me to help me breathe had triggered a reaction call Avascular Necrosis (a disease that literally caused parts of the bones in my knee to die). I was and am extremely lucky that it limited itself to one joint, and that I was able to stop the prednisone before it progressed furthur. However in the meantime the excruiciating pain of the bone death had caused yet another response called Chronic Regional Pain Syndrome.
Which basically means that the pain overloaded my nerves and sent them into an endless pain loop that nothing short of directly numbing the nerves themselves can help.
Through two years of treatments, therapy and hard work I managed to go from being unable to bear weight or tolerate any touch (CRPS makes skin hypersensitive to the point even water or strong air hurt) to being able to walk and appear normal for the most part. I still have pain, and thanks to several sever sports related injuries to that leg from high school I am likely to being in a fair amount of pain for the rest of my life (my ankle is comparable to that of a 80 year old with osteoporosis and arthiritis; several people on my medical team have expressed suprise that I am able to walk on it at all).
So the point of all this sharing is that even without taking my severe asthma and enviomental allergies into account I am still quite authentically "disabled". Getting in and out of cars is hard for me, as well as doing to much walking so in order to keep my pain from becoming so bad I can;t do anything I use a handicap placard. Apparently this is a problem seeing as I am only 25.
On to the incident~
My mom and i traveled into the city to go to a doctor's appointment and on the way out we decided to swing by Arby's for lunch. I made my way to the door alone while my mom stepped off the property to have a cigarette. Approaching the door at the same time as an elderly couple I genially held the door for them.
As he was passing through the door the old man semi turned and distastefully muttered "Ugh parking in a handicap space. Hmph!".
Reigning in my temper I calmly replied, "You know I can produce my disability credentials."
He probably assumed that two young females (my mom looks like a 20 year old) wouldn't have the gall to confront his passive aggressive sniping.
Now keep in mind I in no way threatened him, nor made any conscious attempt to intimidate him. However, unconsciously when I become riled I tend to exhibit a predatory focus that unnerves people (and for good reason because when attacked or threatened I descend into a deep rage that deprives me of conscious control of my actions, resulting in people becoming hurt very badly). If you have ever seen a German Shepard or Doberman go from friendly dog to an alert, focused predator, that is what my demeanor becomes like.
The couple had at this point continued to walk away from me, and I was content to let things go in order to avoid losing my temper, but the man just could not let it be. As he was walking away, he calls back to me, "That's not how things seem."
Argh. Self-control won and I retreated to my calm place filled with fluffy animals and shiny things. Once sure I was not going to chew through his jugular (hey mom always said I can think/fantasize whatever I want as long as I don't do it ><) I replied "Yeah well things aren't always what they seem, now are they?".
All this time they had been walking to ahead of me to the counter area, the same direction I happened to be going. Now other than having my temper aroused and being predatory focused on them to asses the level of threat they represented, I had done nothing other than reply to them in the above exchange.
Still, while they remained blessedly silent at this point they started acting mortally afraid of me. Which created a very wierd experience for the cashier who looked unsure of what had happened other than the couple had pissed me off somehow and now they were cowering. Great.
Lemme tell ya that was a wonderful lunch. Especially on a day when I was already feeling horrible and in a great deal of pain already.
Oh and the couple was indeed lucky they had chosen to snipe at me while my mom was gone. You see moms have a very strong instinctive reaction when their "baby", especially their sick "baby" is threatened.
In the entire scheme of things it was only a brief encounter, but having worked so hard to try and function and get through each day it really bothered me. Like it isn't hard enough being a half crippled 25 year old without having people harass me in public places.
You have my sympathy too. 
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