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I went to a chinese buffet near my house. I figurd since I was out getting a haircut, I would get some lunch. So, I get seated, when it begins.
Just across from me, there was a group of men. One moves in his chair, then released a fart that sounded as if all of hells demons were coming to earth. After this, he proceeded to squeeze out a couple more. These looked like forced farts
After which, he gets up to put on his light jacket, and NEAR MY FACE he releases another one. He left the smell of low tide behind him.
Then, this group of old bats comes in. ok I thought, they'll talk about their social lives or something, wrong. One was complaining about her husbands incontinence. I was able to get a snippet:
OL1-Beatrice, my husband's incontinence has gotten real bad.
OL2- Oh I know, He had several incidents on Sunday, I thought you would never quit having to clean him up.
So, then I tuned them out.
Enter the hellspawn teens
I heard one of them talking about me, saying I was going to clean the buffet out.(Really? I mean REALLY? i'm 10 lbs overweight, cut me loose) They wouldn;t stop staring at me, so then I decided to have some "fun"
Me: Excuse me, are you supposed to be in school?
T: no, its earth day, we're off
Me: Well, I happen to be the truant officer for St. Charles county(
)
T: Oh man, you aren't going to report us are you?
Me: Well, I could, but seeing as though the school day is pretty much over, i'll let it slide, but you better be in school tomorrow
T: Oh sir I will, you can count me in.
That was awesome. Still, the first two were nasty
Just across from me, there was a group of men. One moves in his chair, then released a fart that sounded as if all of hells demons were coming to earth. After this, he proceeded to squeeze out a couple more. These looked like forced farts
After which, he gets up to put on his light jacket, and NEAR MY FACE he releases another one. He left the smell of low tide behind him.Then, this group of old bats comes in. ok I thought, they'll talk about their social lives or something, wrong. One was complaining about her husbands incontinence. I was able to get a snippet:
OL1-Beatrice, my husband's incontinence has gotten real bad.
OL2- Oh I know, He had several incidents on Sunday, I thought you would never quit having to clean him up.
So, then I tuned them out.
Enter the hellspawn teens
I heard one of them talking about me, saying I was going to clean the buffet out.(Really? I mean REALLY? i'm 10 lbs overweight, cut me loose) They wouldn;t stop staring at me, so then I decided to have some "fun"
Me: Excuse me, are you supposed to be in school?
T: no, its earth day, we're off
Me: Well, I happen to be the truant officer for St. Charles county(
)T: Oh man, you aren't going to report us are you?
Me: Well, I could, but seeing as though the school day is pretty much over, i'll let it slide, but you better be in school tomorrow
T: Oh sir I will, you can count me in.
That was awesome. Still, the first two were nasty
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