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Americans in Austria
Just got back from my holiday to Austria (random I know, but 35 degrees centigrade all week, I even got a tan), and thought I would share this.
(In order to cover my ass I should state here that a) I have dual American/British citizenship and therefore have nothing against Americans, except when my Mom is being a grouch and b) an asshat is an asshat, regardless of nationality.)
The bf and I were sitting outside a restaurant having just eaten a very large lunch, when an American family sat down at the table next to us. At that point I asked the waitress for two more drinks and the bill (in German) which I presume meant that the family thought we were natives, and therefore didn't understand them. That is the only explanation I can think of, because if they knew we could understand them then they were even more awful than they seemed.
The waitress came over and gave them menus, which were, surprise suprise, in German, as one would expect in Austria, a famously German-speaking country. Anchluss anyone?
This seemed to anger American Father (AF) and American Mother (AM)
AF: What the hell? What is this? That other place yesterday had the menu in English!
AM: Yeah, they had a special English menu! How do they expect us to read this?
Me and bf look at each other, and mouth the word 'dictionary'. FFS, you didn't think to bring a phrasebook or even deign to learn a little of the native language before you travelled several thousand miles?
AF: I'm calling that waitress over. This is ridiculous.
At this point American Child 1 (AC1) and his sister American Child 2 (AC2) decide to voice their displeasure.
AC1: I wanna shake! Nowhere does a shake! And I want that spaghetti stuff! Spaghetti? In Austria? A local speciality no doubt. Oh. Wait. That's Italy.
AC2: My legs itch! Interesting, but a little off topic. Better luck next time.
The waitress comes over and AF tells her (not asks) to translate the menu for him. All seven pages of it. She looks harassed, is covering twelve tables that I can see (probably more inside the restaurant) and does not have very good English. I knew this because we had previously had a rather involved discussion on how the bf wanted his steak, since I couldn't remember the German word for 'rare', and she didn't know the English terms for different stages of meat cooking. I ended up talking about blood and waving my hands to demonstrate the slaughter process.
She tried her best, but clearly didn't know all the English words for all the various types of food in the huge menu. She was only about seventeen and the town wasn't a touristy place where one would expect a lot of non-locals. Any sensible person would just have asked for schnitzel, but no, this family wanted to know everything. In the end she left them to it.
AF: Well this is terrible service. They should speak English!
AM: Don't they realise tourists are what keep this country afloat?
AC1: I want fries!
AC2: My leg itches!
AF: under his breath They just don't like Americans because we beat them during the war. <A lot more ranting about Hitler and something about Nazi waitresses>
AM: Well just choose something and if you don't like we won't pay for it. This is ridiculous. What do they expect if they don't write things in English?
Basically they ranting round and round in circles for ages. How dare the Nazis not cater for them? The Americans won the war for goodness sake! So rude! And why did everything come with parsley potatoes? What was wrong with fries?
Eventually they chose their food, after regailing the waitress with another round of complaints about the lack of English menus (a rant which she clearly didn't understand).
AF: Well one thing's for sure, no tip!
AM: Damn straight! What stupid people!
Asshats.
(In order to cover my ass I should state here that a) I have dual American/British citizenship and therefore have nothing against Americans, except when my Mom is being a grouch and b) an asshat is an asshat, regardless of nationality.)
The bf and I were sitting outside a restaurant having just eaten a very large lunch, when an American family sat down at the table next to us. At that point I asked the waitress for two more drinks and the bill (in German) which I presume meant that the family thought we were natives, and therefore didn't understand them. That is the only explanation I can think of, because if they knew we could understand them then they were even more awful than they seemed.
The waitress came over and gave them menus, which were, surprise suprise, in German, as one would expect in Austria, a famously German-speaking country. Anchluss anyone?
This seemed to anger American Father (AF) and American Mother (AM)
AF: What the hell? What is this? That other place yesterday had the menu in English!
AM: Yeah, they had a special English menu! How do they expect us to read this?
Me and bf look at each other, and mouth the word 'dictionary'. FFS, you didn't think to bring a phrasebook or even deign to learn a little of the native language before you travelled several thousand miles?
AF: I'm calling that waitress over. This is ridiculous.
At this point American Child 1 (AC1) and his sister American Child 2 (AC2) decide to voice their displeasure.
AC1: I wanna shake! Nowhere does a shake! And I want that spaghetti stuff! Spaghetti? In Austria? A local speciality no doubt. Oh. Wait. That's Italy.
AC2: My legs itch! Interesting, but a little off topic. Better luck next time.
The waitress comes over and AF tells her (not asks) to translate the menu for him. All seven pages of it. She looks harassed, is covering twelve tables that I can see (probably more inside the restaurant) and does not have very good English. I knew this because we had previously had a rather involved discussion on how the bf wanted his steak, since I couldn't remember the German word for 'rare', and she didn't know the English terms for different stages of meat cooking. I ended up talking about blood and waving my hands to demonstrate the slaughter process.
She tried her best, but clearly didn't know all the English words for all the various types of food in the huge menu. She was only about seventeen and the town wasn't a touristy place where one would expect a lot of non-locals. Any sensible person would just have asked for schnitzel, but no, this family wanted to know everything. In the end she left them to it.
AF: Well this is terrible service. They should speak English!
AM: Don't they realise tourists are what keep this country afloat?
AC1: I want fries!
AC2: My leg itches!
AF: under his breath They just don't like Americans because we beat them during the war. <A lot more ranting about Hitler and something about Nazi waitresses>
AM: Well just choose something and if you don't like we won't pay for it. This is ridiculous. What do they expect if they don't write things in English?
Basically they ranting round and round in circles for ages. How dare the Nazis not cater for them? The Americans won the war for goodness sake! So rude! And why did everything come with parsley potatoes? What was wrong with fries?
Eventually they chose their food, after regailing the waitress with another round of complaints about the lack of English menus (a rant which she clearly didn't understand).
AF: Well one thing's for sure, no tip!
AM: Damn straight! What stupid people!
Asshats.
I know. I live with them.
This was a nice even-handed approach on everyone's part.
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