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We walk here, we walk there, we walk anywhere!

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  • #1

    We walk here, we walk there, we walk anywhere!

    Something that I'm seeing more and more often, which I assume is a sign we're getting closer and closer to Idiocracy, is pedestrians in our long, sloping driveway that is just wide enough for traffic in both directions to pass each other.

    But how are they to get to the lake across the road, you ask? How are they to get up and down to the parking lot, you ask? Good points, truly.

    There are 3 options:
    1. Walk on the left side of the driveway, against oncoming traffic.
    2. Walk on the right side of the driveway, with oncoming traffic.
    3. Walk in the middle of the driveway, spread out in a line if there's more than one pedestrian, to be sure no traffic can go by in either direction.


    Basic traffic safety says option 1 is the best & recommended plan, but then we wouldn't be here, now would we? In fact, the option quickly becoming the most popular around here is door number 3!

    Even in that situation, most of the people are smart enough to slowly dawdle over to one side or the other when traffic is coming. Most just barely in time to get out of the way of my vehicle when I'm blazing along at the 15 mph campus speed limit. -.-

    This morning's special pair looked back over their shoulders, saw me coming up the drive, and decided to move closer to the sides. As in, the first woman moved about 2 feet to her left side, and the other woman moved about 2 feet to her right side. Meaning they've totally blocked up the driveway to the point that I can't go around them in any way, without running down one of them. Or pretending I'm a bowling ball and splitting right down the middle to whack both of them and pick up that spare...

    I came across an entire pack of them this summer. A group that was going hiking - about 20 people - decided the best place to gather and plan their hike was not the mulched area at the head of the trail, but instead the middle of the driveway was the perfect place to talk out all the details. Half the group looked up at me & my vehicle as I pulled in off the road and came to a stop about 5 feet from them. Then they just went back to their planning. The other half had their backs to me and I don't know that they noticed me at all. After nearly 2 full minutes of me staring bullets at them, I finally started to get out of my vehicle. At which point they all looked up and scurried off to the side of the drive. "Durr, it's the busy morning arrival time for all of the daytime staff; let's block the entire driveway with a large of people. Brilliant!!!"
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  • #2
    Ya know, there's a reason why the term "jaywalking" includes a word meaning "rube" or "idiot"...So sorry you've had to encounter quite so many of them.
    "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
    "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
    "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
    "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
    "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
    "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
    Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
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    • #3
      And people wonder why I want to mount a semi airhorn in my SUV. They might not move out of the way, but they're gonna need clean pants...
      "If your day is filled with firefighting, you need to start taking the matches away from the toddlers…” - HM

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      • #4
        Quoth Crossbow View Post
        And people wonder why I want to mount a semi airhorn in my SUV. They might not move out of the way, but they're gonna need clean pants...
        Better yet, get a train horn.
        This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

        I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

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        • #5
          In my neighborhood I have a problem backing out in the morning (when it is dark) and joggers running in the road. I always stop right before the sidewalk to double check but the streetlights are crap. Then there are the pregnant women pushing strollers in the street. We have very nice sidewalks! Do you want to potentially endanger your child so two of you can walk side by side?

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          • #6
            Everyone knew I'd be here, yes? Agree, SO MUCH with everything Gerrinson. And also with Reverend. Tourists like "oh, pretty sailboats!" and they wander into the street. Soccer moms in the bike lane. Dog walkers on back roads who act totally surprised to see a CAR on the street.. I really have nothing to add, you have described my home town to a T.
            Replace anger management with stupidity management.

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            • #7
              Yup, the people walking into the road are going to be coming here soon. We don't have sailboats, but we're about to have fall in New England, which of course means pretty, pretty leaves.

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              • #8
                We have sidewalks and most people use them, which is awesome.

                The problem I have is that people drive down my street at 45mph to skip the streetlight on the corner, so I don't let my kids ride their bikes in the street. If we're on the sidewalk - I get dirty looks from the neighbors. If they ride in the street, I have to watch for crazy speeders.

                So my kids aren't allowed to go ride their bikes. It's sad really.
                https://purplefish-quilting.square.site/

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                • #9
                  Quoth Gerrinson View Post
                  Yup, the people walking into the road are going to be coming here soon. We don't have sailboats, but we're about to have fall in New England, which of course means pretty, pretty leaves.
                  Reminds me of a favorite Family Guy episode.
                  "Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probably

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                  • #10
                    Quoth Food Lady View Post
                    Reminds me of a favorite Family Guy episode.

                    "LEAFERS!"

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                    • #11
                      Quoth An Haddock View Post
                      "LEAFERS!"
                      That episode is pretty much a factual documentary. For serious.

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                      • #12
                        Quoth catcul View Post
                        Better yet, get a train horn.
                        If I thought I had enough space/power for the compressor, I'd seriously look into it.
                        "If your day is filled with firefighting, you need to start taking the matches away from the toddlers…” - HM

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                        • #13
                          Quoth Gerrinson View Post
                          This morning's special pair looked back over their shoulders, saw me coming up the drive, and decided to move closer to the sides. As in, the first woman moved about 2 feet to her left side, and the other woman moved about 2 feet to her right side. Meaning they've totally blocked up the driveway to the point that I can't go around them in any way, without running down one of them. Or pretending I'm a bowling ball and splitting right down the middle to whack both of them and pick up that spare...
                          Sounds like the damn tourists in Santa Fe. No sense of self-preservation. I'm surprised there's not more of them run over, honestly. It's like they don't comprehend that SF is a functioning city and the state capitol. It's not like Brigadoon and only exists during the tourist season.

                          And now I get deal with more of them here in ABQ because Balloon Fiesta starts next weekend.
                          It's floating wicker propelled by fire!

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                          • #14
                            Quoth Crossbow View Post
                            If I thought I had enough space/power for the compressor, I'd seriously look into it.
                            One guy mounted a train horn on his Scion xB. That's not a big car.

                            EPIC TRAIN HORN PRANK Warning: the video can get really loud.
                            This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."

                            I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.

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                            • #15
                              Quoth Pagan View Post
                              It's not like Brigadoon and only exists during the tourist season.
                              If it's tourist season, what's the bag limit?
                              Any fool can piss on the floor. It takes a talented SC to shit on the ceiling.

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