I Screamed in the Store

[Gaki]

When someone puts a diaper in the sanitary napkin box they invariably get stuck in there and in my trying to get them out, shit goes everywhere and the box comes right off the wall. So a little while ago I put a little sign up that says for people to NOT DO THIS. There has been a significant decrease in the amount of diapers I find in the box as I offer in the sign the suggestion (order) to place them instead in the trash can.

CW: Someone put a diaper in the sanitary napkin box.
Me: eeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH
CW:

Yes. I screamed. Like that. Out loud. In the store. Turns out there were TWO diapers stuffed into the box. They weren't even closed into little diaper bundles and they were SOAKING with pee pee.

The mental process of this one...

SC: I think I'll do that little cashier over there a solid and put my Pepsi I didn't want in the sandwich case so it doesn't get cold before she notices it and puts it back.
Me: Oh how sweet of you, IF I EVER SEE YOU DO THIS I'M GOING TO [HORRIFYING HORRIFYING HORRIFYING HORRIFYING HORRIFYING HORRIFYING HORRIFYING HORRIFYING] YOU INFECTIOUS BEEF-WITTED CODPIECE.

SC: This pump isn't working.
Me: If you want to move to another one that's up to you but I can't do anything about it right now. [busily ringing up A THOUSAND PEOPLE BY MYSELF.]

Why? Why even bother to complain about it? It's not even broken, it just appears to be because you're putting the nozzle in your car the wrong way so it keeps shutting off on you. Congrats. Take it out a little bit, don't choke her with it.

Me: That'll be X.xx
SC: Hang OOOOON. *goes and gets gum or some shit.*
Me: *rings it up* ............
SC: *staring at me.*
Me: *staring back*
SC: Ummmm...how much is it?
Me: Is there anything else?
SC: ...no.
Me: Y.yy.

Our rewards program has two sets of points. One where the cents are flexible and one where they are not. You can use one or the other but not add them up.

Me: You have XX points on your card.
Old man SC: So that means I have XY.
Me: No.
SC: Ehn?
Me: No. You have XX or YY. One or the other.
SC: I knew that, I was just joking.
Me: Right.

This is the same guy who told me I should order tobacco after hours. AT A 24 HOUR STORE.

When someone just won't acknowledge me at all that just pisses me off to the utmost extremes so here's how I handle it.

Me: How are you today?
SC: ....
Me: Do you have your rewards card?
SC: .... *throws card onto the counter*
Me: Thank you, would you like a bag?
SC: .......
Me: Would you like a bag?
SC: ..... *throws money at me*
Me: x.xx out of y.yy? Your change will be z.zz. Would you like a bag?
SC: ......
Me: Sir. Would you like a bag?
SC: ......yeah.
Me: Okay. Thank you and you have a good day now!
SC: .....yeah.

I refuse to be ignored.

SC: The pump isn't woooooorrrrrkiiiiiiiing.
Me: *walks out there*
SC: Oh...now it is.

SC: The pump's not working.
Me: *walks out there*
SC: Oh wait. Nevermind.

SC: The pump isn't pumping my gas!
Me: *walks out there*
SC: Oh...false alarm.

It's funny how my mere presence is magical. I make the ATM work, I make the pumps work, I should just work for a fix-it company. I'll just sit in the corner eating all day. Because it is well known at my work that whenever I decide to eat we become excessively busy all of a sudden. Everything will be fixed and business will boom.

Customers were complaining about how long things were taking the other day.

My response: We're a little short staffed. Had to let one of our girls go home due to a death in the family.

Here's the most interesting way that played out:

SC: Oh that's too bad. I worked right through my grandmother's death though.
Me: Her cousin was murdered. I sent her home.
SC:

Nobody complained again. Curious. Very curious.

[PepperElf]

well that's one way to shut up an asshole

for your coworker. that sucks

[Gaki]

well that's one way to shut up an asshole

for your coworker. that sucks

Thanks. I got her a card that wasn't too offensive (anybody notice how offensive those cards can be? Dayumn.) because it was so short and sweet. It said "Sorrow isn't forever..." and then the inside said "love is."

And then we hugged a lot. She's the best CW ever too. Hard working, always smiles, joking, laughing, and totally real down to her very bones. Just goes to show that shit like this seems to only happen to the best of us.

[Seraph]

Gaki, I'm sitting here goosebumping and nope'ing to an extent I haven't in a while. You have my respect for the diaper thing. I'd have probably duct taped it shut with a sign "THIS IS WHY WE CANT HAVE NICE THINGS ANYMORE".

....aaaand yeah, that's why I'd be in trouble.

Also, your poor coworker....my e-hugs to her.

[XCashier]

Is there a decent-sized trash can near the changing table? If not, that might be the problem; your boss should put one there. If there is, well, I don't know what the trouble is, aside from thoughtless SCs.

[RootedPhoenix]

*hugs & prayers* to your coworker.

[Gaki]

Is there a decent-sized trash can near the changing table? If not, that might be the problem; your boss should put one there. If there is, well, I don't know what the trouble is, aside from thoughtless SCs.

There was. And now there's another one. There is no emote for a crying, maniacal, pitiful laugh.

[bankworking]

When someone puts a diaper in the sanitary napkin box they invariably get stuck in there and in my trying to get them out, shit goes everywhere and the box comes right off the wall. So a little while ago I put a little sign up that says for people to NOT DO THIS. There has been a significant decrease in the amount of diapers I find in the box as I offer in the sign the suggestion (order) to place them instead in the trash can.

CW: Someone put a diaper in the sanitary napkin box.
Me: eeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH
CW:

Yes. I screamed. Like that. Out loud. In the store. Turns out there were TWO diapers stuffed into the box. They weren't even closed into little diaper bundles and they were SOAKING with pee pee.

I have run across a bathroom that did not have a trashcan. Paperless (no paper towel dispensers, just hand dryers), no trash can holes near the sinks and no can anywhere to be seen. Fortunately, I keep ziplock bags in my diaper bag because my grandfather gets freaked by the idea of diapers even in his trashcans, so I just wrapped the diaper up into a ball and bagged it up. Have to admit, if I hadn't had that option, I might have used the sanitary receptacle and not thought twice about it.

But a trash can generally seems much more convenient.

[XCashier]

There was. And now there's another one.

Then there's no reason whatsoever for them to stuff diapers in the napkin disposal. I'm very sorry you have to deal with that; would that we could catch bathroom vandals in the act and force them to scrub down the filthy bathroom with a toothbrush, with which they would have to scrub their own teeth afterwards.

[Kristev]

XCashier, that's every janitor (and former janitor's) dream right there.

[Halo_miles]

And it's situations like these that make me want to put a, "Bang Head Here" sticker on the counters of my place of employment. Oh no, not for my head...for the head of every self entitled twit that comes through.