Tweet
I've alluded in earlier threads that I moonlight (sometimes even in actual moonlight) as a nightclub/social event photographer.
Whilst it's technically an "easy" job for the most part, there is some skill involved, and while I've never really studied photography I've been at it a while and I've developed my own "style" - which leads to the first type of idiot.
I/xxx can take better photos than you
This comes in three main flavours.
Orange: Jersey shore wannabes, mostly the female variety, often a hefty amount of fake tan applied (hence the name/colour) who'll usually pose with either an "awkward lean," "duck face" or the "Jupiter" (gravity just got a whole lot stronger in the presence of the camera). Will reject every single photo, while exclaiming that I'm a "sh*t photographer." Or "that photo makes me look ugly."
My response in this situation, "The camera is just a mirror"
Apple pop top: The photography student.
For the most part, this type is usually ok, asking a few questions, usually about the lighting modifiers I use, but occasionally I'll get the textbook quoter or professor parrot that'll spout out some "golden rule of photography" that I'm breaking. It's art, not a scientific paper, and I have been doing this a lot longer than you've been studying.
Bonus points if they look down on me for never actually studying photography.
Lemon-lime and extra bitters: The other "professional" photographer(s)
As above with students, most are alright, but it's the others I shake my head at. Whether it's due to my choice of brand, or that my camera isn't "pro" enough, any excuse will do to look down on me.
Ex 1: shooting a large stage from up close with an ultra wide lens on my cheap camera I hear a snort of derision from my left. Look over to see someone sneering at the camera. I shrug,
drop that camera to my left hip, and pull up the other, far more expensive camera from my right side for a close in shot.
Ex 2: Prior to getting my far more expensive camera, the cheap camera was my only choice, paired with a lens originally released in 1987 (with an optical design much older) I shot at a regular event I'd never shot at before, after getting into the DJ competition. The other photographer was using a rig worth about $5-6000. Mine was worth probably $1400 at most.
Event promoter claimed my shots were the best he's ever had at one of his events, due to my tight cropping/shooting (making the place look busier than it was) and vivid colour - as much as I don't like talking down other people's work, when you're shooting to promote an event, a grainy, flat image of two people surrounded by an empty dance floor isn't a great look.
Ex 3: Same camera as Ex 2, being asked to set up a camera again 3-4 times as expensive as mine as the other guy liked my shots better. Next time don't have the flash firing 3x as bright as it needs to be.
What happens in public STAYS in public
Should be common sense. However along with common courtesy, neither are that common anymore.
You want to stay with your boyfriend? Don't kiss someone else on the dancefloor.
This actually happened. I will admit, if I see a couple making out I will do a quick snap as I walk past, as often they like to share that around on the net. Not this time, as a few seconds later I had a gaggle of schoolgirls (seriously doubt these girls had been 18 for very long) begging me to delete the photo.
Being a little evil, as they were quite rude, I didn't, and sent it on to the promoter, along with all the other shots from the night. 
The next time I spoke with the promoter, he relates a little story to me. The girl's mother had called him to tell him that her boyfriend had seen the photo of her kissing someone not him, and ended the relationship (and rightly so
). Apparently the mother wasn't upset or angry, so I'm not sure why she called (or how she got his number) but I just find the whole situation hilarious.
Now I do have more, but it's almost 2am here and I'm all smiley'd out, will post part 2 in the near future
Whilst it's technically an "easy" job for the most part, there is some skill involved, and while I've never really studied photography I've been at it a while and I've developed my own "style" - which leads to the first type of idiot.
I/xxx can take better photos than you
This comes in three main flavours.
Orange: Jersey shore wannabes, mostly the female variety, often a hefty amount of fake tan applied (hence the name/colour) who'll usually pose with either an "awkward lean," "duck face" or the "Jupiter" (gravity just got a whole lot stronger in the presence of the camera). Will reject every single photo, while exclaiming that I'm a "sh*t photographer." Or "that photo makes me look ugly."
My response in this situation, "The camera is just a mirror"
Apple pop top: The photography student.
For the most part, this type is usually ok, asking a few questions, usually about the lighting modifiers I use, but occasionally I'll get the textbook quoter or professor parrot that'll spout out some "golden rule of photography" that I'm breaking. It's art, not a scientific paper, and I have been doing this a lot longer than you've been studying.
Bonus points if they look down on me for never actually studying photography.
Lemon-lime and extra bitters: The other "professional" photographer(s)
As above with students, most are alright, but it's the others I shake my head at. Whether it's due to my choice of brand, or that my camera isn't "pro" enough, any excuse will do to look down on me.
Ex 1: shooting a large stage from up close with an ultra wide lens on my cheap camera I hear a snort of derision from my left. Look over to see someone sneering at the camera. I shrug,
drop that camera to my left hip, and pull up the other, far more expensive camera from my right side for a close in shot.Ex 2: Prior to getting my far more expensive camera, the cheap camera was my only choice, paired with a lens originally released in 1987 (with an optical design much older) I shot at a regular event I'd never shot at before, after getting into the DJ competition. The other photographer was using a rig worth about $5-6000. Mine was worth probably $1400 at most.
Event promoter claimed my shots were the best he's ever had at one of his events, due to my tight cropping/shooting (making the place look busier than it was) and vivid colour - as much as I don't like talking down other people's work, when you're shooting to promote an event, a grainy, flat image of two people surrounded by an empty dance floor isn't a great look.
Ex 3: Same camera as Ex 2, being asked to set up a camera again 3-4 times as expensive as mine as the other guy liked my shots better. Next time don't have the flash firing 3x as bright as it needs to be.
What happens in public STAYS in public
Should be common sense. However along with common courtesy, neither are that common anymore.
You want to stay with your boyfriend? Don't kiss someone else on the dancefloor.
This actually happened. I will admit, if I see a couple making out I will do a quick snap as I walk past, as often they like to share that around on the net. Not this time, as a few seconds later I had a gaggle of schoolgirls (seriously doubt these girls had been 18 for very long) begging me to delete the photo.
Being a little evil, as they were quite rude, I didn't, and sent it on to the promoter, along with all the other shots from the night. The next time I spoke with the promoter, he relates a little story to me. The girl's mother had called him to tell him that her boyfriend had seen the photo of her kissing someone not him, and ended the relationship (and rightly so
). Apparently the mother wasn't upset or angry, so I'm not sure why she called (or how she got his number) but I just find the whole situation hilarious.Now I do have more, but it's almost 2am here and I'm all smiley'd out, will post part 2 in the near future
Our proper photogs have real cameras. He helped us to tweak our settings to improve our stuff a lot (especially for big D, who covers tons of concerts, where flashes up front are often disallowed; he even gave me some tips), pointed us toward Eneloops (I was a little scared that I was the only one of us who had heard of the wonderful little things before this session), discussed the evils of digital zoom, etc. 'Twas an enlightening hour ^_^ And none of use use Auto 
I'm not that kind of photographer!
Comment