Well, they say you shouldn't, but tell me this: If the cover of said book had a picture of a voluptuous young lady clad only in a red satin bedsheet, strategically placed to dodge local, state and federal indecency law, well, would it be safe to say it's probably NOT THE COVER OF A COOKBOOK?!
Likewise, as soon as I picked up the phone, the first 4 words out of this gentleman's mouth had me convinced I was about to waste a good 3 minutes of my life I'd never get back, to say nothing of the drawl he had.
First words out of his Gomer Pyle Gob: "Ya'll tow cars, right?"

Nah, we're just a front for a branch of the Columbo Crime Family, better call someone else. Well, with mental capability of that caliber, you can imagine what I was steeling myself for as I said "Yes"
"Ah, good, you know where the woodlands are, right?"
"Woodland? The only woodland I know of is the Woodland exit off I80, up past Podunkville and Outer Podunkville....
"Nah, I mean the woodlands on Rt. 45"
"You mean the state game lands?"
"Yeah, I'm out here in the woods, and someone's got their car parked back here, and you need to come tow it cuz' it's in my way"
"Uh, we can't just up and tow off state property, you'll need to call the State Police, or more likely, the DCNR (Forestry Service)"
"But you tow illegally parked cars, don't ya? This one shouldn't be back here!"
"We can only tow if the property owner tells us to, you'll need to contact the state and have them call us, or whoever they feel like calling to get anything back there towed that isn't yours."
"What? Look, I just want to go hunting, they're blocking the trail, and man, I do NOT have time to wait out here all day for them!"
Oh yes you do! *CLICK*
Lesse, 1 minute 15 seconds wasted, got out of that one easier than I thought I would, but still, I'll be cursing him from my deathbed nonetheless if the nurse bringing me my pills gets delayed by that much time.... it's all YOUR fault! You hear me you dumb hillbilly???
In retrospect, I should have asked Cletus for his Mom's phone number, so I could call her up and get a few questions answered. Namely, was your son always this dumb? Or did he only start manifesting these symptoms after the mule kicked him in the head for the fifth time? I might get some real insight into the nature v. nurture argument.
And it's only Monday.....
Likewise, as soon as I picked up the phone, the first 4 words out of this gentleman's mouth had me convinced I was about to waste a good 3 minutes of my life I'd never get back, to say nothing of the drawl he had.
First words out of his Gomer Pyle Gob: "Ya'll tow cars, right?"

Nah, we're just a front for a branch of the Columbo Crime Family, better call someone else. Well, with mental capability of that caliber, you can imagine what I was steeling myself for as I said "Yes"
"Ah, good, you know where the woodlands are, right?"
"Woodland? The only woodland I know of is the Woodland exit off I80, up past Podunkville and Outer Podunkville....
"Nah, I mean the woodlands on Rt. 45"
"You mean the state game lands?"
"Yeah, I'm out here in the woods, and someone's got their car parked back here, and you need to come tow it cuz' it's in my way"
"Uh, we can't just up and tow off state property, you'll need to call the State Police, or more likely, the DCNR (Forestry Service)"
"But you tow illegally parked cars, don't ya? This one shouldn't be back here!"
"We can only tow if the property owner tells us to, you'll need to contact the state and have them call us, or whoever they feel like calling to get anything back there towed that isn't yours."
"What? Look, I just want to go hunting, they're blocking the trail, and man, I do NOT have time to wait out here all day for them!"
Oh yes you do! *CLICK*
Lesse, 1 minute 15 seconds wasted, got out of that one easier than I thought I would, but still, I'll be cursing him from my deathbed nonetheless if the nurse bringing me my pills gets delayed by that much time.... it's all YOUR fault! You hear me you dumb hillbilly???
In retrospect, I should have asked Cletus for his Mom's phone number, so I could call her up and get a few questions answered. Namely, was your son always this dumb? Or did he only start manifesting these symptoms after the mule kicked him in the head for the fifth time? I might get some real insight into the nature v. nurture argument.
And it's only Monday.....
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