Are you trying to poison your baby?

[Knightmare]

This happened to me today.

The Idiot SC that didn't Listen
Cast:
Me: Hiya
SC: Asshat lady that wants to poison her son.

SC comes up to the paint desk and asks
SC: "Excuse me. I'm refinishing a crib I bought for my baby. I have stain on it, but I want to protect it. What do you recommend?"
Me: "For a crib? I'd go with shellac. It's non-toxic."
SC: "My neighbor told me that I want a varnish or spar urathane? Is that right?"
Me: "Not for a crib. My daughter chewed on the rail when she was teething. Most kids do. Varnish and urathane aren't exactly healthy if ingested."
SC: "Hmm. Can you show me the varnish?"
Me: "Sure. Follow me."
We walk down the next aisle and I show her the varnish. I show her the ingredient list.
Me: "Okay, see here? Oil. Varnish is oil based. So is urathane. To protect that crib, you want shellac."
SC: "But my neighbor told me varnish. What is spar urathane?"
Me: "Spar urathane is good for boats and things left outside to the elements. It's great against UV rays and salt water. It's Super Urathane!"
SC: "Salt water, huh? I think I'll take that. Drool is salty, right?"
Me: "Trust me, you want shellac. It's non-toxic when dry. It's made from all natural ingredients, not refined petroleum products. When it's dry, it just a coating of protein."
SC: "What's it made of?"
Me: "Alcohol and bug poop."
SC: "What? That's not going on my crib! Alcohol?! Bug poop?!"
Me: "Don't worry. It's refined. It's totally harmless."
SC: "I want the urathane! My boy will not eat bug poop!"
Me: "You'd rather he chew on wood coated with oil and synthetic materials?"
SC: "Well, my neighbor said that..."
Me: "What does your neighbor do? Is he a wood worker or something similar?"
SC: "No, he's an insurance salesman."
Me: "Okay. So, here's my question to you. Are you going to take the word of someone that sells insurance, which has nothing to do with chemicals; or are you going to listen to a guy that sells this stuff every day to people that have asked the same question as you?"
SC: "But my neighbor said to get urathane."
Me: "Ma'am. This is your boy we're talking about. If you use urathane, there is a chance he can get sick. With shellac, there is no chance of him getting sick.
You. Want. The. Shellac."
SC: *sigh* "Fine. I'll take the shellac."

Thank God this lady finally saw reason. I know varnish and urathane aren't deadly poisons, but for God's sake, when I tell you what you need, listen to me!

[Bluenomi]

Her neighbour was probably trying to sell her some insurance at the same time!
Glad you got the message through to her, babies eating toxic paint isn't a good thing. I'd rather bug poop any day.

[powerboy]

It just doesn't make any sense. They listen to other people, but not the one who actually knows their shit.

[JustADude]

They listen to other people, but not the one who actually knows their shit.

'Cause they hear the idiot first, and the idea settles into the former blissful void that was their mind, then latches on like a barnacle, covering everything in a coat of rock-hard Stupid. Then, when the person who knows what they're talking about comes along to tell them the RIGHT thing, they've got to take a hammer and chisel to get the Stupid out before they can put the proper information in place.

[Shironu-Akaineko]

'Cause they hear the idiot first, and the idea settles into the former blissful void that was their mind, then latches on like a barnacle, covering everything in a coat of rock-hard Stupid. Then, when the person who knows what they're talking about comes along to tell them the RIGHT thing, they've got to take a hammer and chisel to get the Stupid out before they can put the proper information in place.

And sometimes, the Chisel breaks off.

That's why we have this forum.

[CorDarei]

sounds like something i heard in a hospital...


doctors don't like the "new" policy of allowing prescription commercials, because all people do is go in and say "i want so-and-so medicine" instead of having the doctor actually diagnose the patient and determine that a different medicine would be more beneficial to them, the patient does a self-diagnosis... so instead of arguing w/ the patient, they'll prescribe the drug they wanted.

[MoonChild2007]

Good for you to tell her! I always get the same crap at my job. One time, I told a customer that we don't accept checks from other banks for tax payment for their business (don't ask me why we just don't) and when I told him that, he says, "but they told me I can do it". I asked him who? He says his accountant. An accoutant is NOT bank teller!

when I tell you what you need, listen to me!

They would rather listen to people from the outside rather than the people who are actually in the field! its like asking for a cake at a hardware store!

[Foxglove8778]

... I guess if she read something like this she'd never eat out again.... bug poop bothers her so much.....

[infavorofnaturalselection]

People would honestly be surprised to find out that a lot of their foods/ perfumes come from bug poop or other bug parts. Those artifical colors/preservatives come from natural sources bug wings for instance. Perfume is another major benefactor of industrial uses of bug parts.

Hey it's much better then what they used to use in perfumes/makeup. You would have gotten metal poisioning and slowly go insane or die decades before you should have.

Plus alcohol and bug poop are all natural so greenpeace shouldn't complain about people using it to protect their furniture/patios.

[Jack7957]

SC: "No, he's an insurance salesman."

You just ruined this guys plan. He was going to teach the child to chew on the rails, then have his insurance company sue you, the store, and the maker of the varnish for not including a warning about not using the varnish on baby cribs when the baby got sick.

[Hobgoblin]

Continuing on the bug part theme, anyone here ever use the citrus orange mouthwash? Wonder what makes it orange? Bug parts. It's listed as some wort of acid (I haven't seen the name in 3 years or so, so I can't remmeber it) but it is a beetle extract. They smash the beetles and then distill the acid/color out of them. At least, that's what our R and D guy told me.

Go figure? And that helps my breath smell better and fights plaque? Damn.

[CancelMyService]

What's funny is a lot of this comes from the "people at the store will lie to me to make a sale" mindset, that's why they believe their friend/neighbor/dog who doesn't know thing one about the item they're buying over the person who actually sells it.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Your red-orange bug part dye is most likely cochineal (I am not sure if I spelled that right). They are soft bodied, grey beetles that infest (at least around here) cactus.) If you squash one, a brilliant fushia dye spurts all over your hands.

In fact, it's the exact same shade as the new Revlon lip stain I just bought. Hmm.....

I had an epiphany over the weekend. I was considering the death of a toddler the next burg over, shot to death by her druggie gangsta asshole baby daddy during a dispute with other druggie gangsta assholes. It's horrible, yes. It is the sort of thing that keeps me up at night.

However, the truth of it is, and as cold as this sounds, it's natural selection at work. This guy shot his own offspring because he was too stupid to not get into a gun battle with his child around. His genes are removed from the population. He does not get to re-populate the world with others bearing his clearly inferior genes. That's how nature works.

This dumb cow wanting to finish a crib with toxic chemicals? Further proof that Darwin was onto something. Sad, but that's how nature is. That's how the world works.

[Hobgoblin]

Your red-orange bug part dye is most likely cochineal (I am not sure if I spelled that right). They are soft bodied, grey beetles that infest (at least around here) cactus.) If you squash one, a brilliant fushia dye spurts all over your hands.

Ding! That's the stuff.

[Becks]

I wonder if Child Protective Services would do anything about that woman.

Probably not.