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Objection, your honor!
I get talking to this guy who claims he is a lawyer. He wants to upgrade one of the lines on his account but he's past due. Our policy does not allow upgrades on past due accounts. Our system will NOT let us do them, there are no exceptions or overrides. His argument was that because he'd made an agreement with us to pay the balance a couple of weeks from now his account was not in a true past due status and he should be allowed up upgrade.
Of course I explained to him that no, it doesn't work like that.
He then refers me to our lengthy customer service agreement on the <red checkmark> site and asks me to point out to him the SPECIFIC section that states this is not allowed.
I told him it's the standard upgrade policy that states you can't do it if it's past due. Past due means past due, it doesn't matter if you have an agreement to pay later, the outstsanding balance is still PAST DUE.
I am WRONG! He says. In his legal opinion since he has a standing arrangement to pay the bill he is NOT past due and we are required (his word not mine) to allow him to do this upgrade. If we do not we are apparently in violation of some kind FCC regulations or federal laws , etc, etc.
At this point I'm done with him and I tell him straight up the policy is the policy regardless of how it is worded online. Past due is Past due is Past due and he can't upgrade. If he still wants to dispute it, here's the number to Legal.
Verified idiot
Lady calls in upset because apparently we messed up something up on her account. Okay, I'm sorry about that and I can fix it for you no problem. May I have your passcode please?
Oh you don't know the passcode? ....Then it seems we've hit a dead end as I can't make any changes on the account without it.
She says that shouldn't matter because WE made the mistake and therefore SHE shouldn't have to verify anything to fix it. I reiterate that I cannot make ANY changes on the account, even corrective ones, without the passcode.
So then she says that I shouldn't have to verify her again because she called about this same issue last week and the account holder verified then.
Yes, she actually thought that verification on a PREVIOUS CALL was sufficient to verify her this time. Can you imagine if you walked in to a bar and tried to argue that because some other bartender checked your ID there LAST WEEK that they shouldn't have to ID you again this time?
My faith in humanity rapidly fading I explained to her again that I can't do anything without the passcode, no ifs, ands or buts.
Then she told me how much she hated my company and hung up.
Customer standard time strikes again
Another customer, ANOTHER ONE, who wants to restore an Unlimited Data Plan they switched off of in 2014. For those keeping score, this would be the FOURTH such customer in the last few months.
WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE??? Who in their right mind thinks we'll be able to change something like that two or more years after the fact??
You're not fooling anyone
I am speaking to "Bob Smith" from Riverside, California. "Bob Smith" wants to order three brand new iPhones for some of his lines with priority shipping.
Oh and did I mention "Bob Smith" also has a very thick indian accent and is apparently surrounded by other people with indian accents based on the background noise on the call?
Did I also mention "Bob Smith" wants these new iphones shipped to an address in New Jersey??
Oh I'm sorry Mr. Smith, it seems our ordering system just went down on us...what a shame.
I'm afraid you'll have to call back later or go to one of our <red checkmark> stores to get your phones.
Mr. Smith...Mr. Smith are you still there?
*CLICK*
And that was about the point I plastered that account with fraud notes.
What do you think this is, Judge Judy?
I get a lot of dumb requests for credits, but this has to be one of the dumbest. Woman had her account suspended for non pay, allegedly due to an error on our part but I can find no evidence of any such error.
That said, it's the last call of the day and I can see this account has been with us for 14 years. She's able to pay the full balance (I always find it amazing how QUICKLY customers can come up with money when their phones get shut off. Imagine that!) So I decide to be really nice and waive the reconnection fee for her.
Of course, you know the name of this site so obviously this doesn't end here.
She proceeds to tell me she would like some additional credits due to...wait for it....
Pain and Suffering.
Yes folks! She wants more credit because of how horrible a time she endured with her phones being cutoff because she didn't pay her bill.
And to make this even more ridiculous, the total time her phones were disconnected for? 37 minutes.
Appparently, it was the most awful and torturous 37 minutes of her life beacuse she is VERY serious about this credit. I politely explain to her I've already waived the reconnect fee when I could have let it stand and a 37 minute outage of her own making isn't really justification for additional credits.
Suddenly she goes completely ballistic on me and demands my manager.
As it turns out my manager didn't give her anything extra either.
But the story doesn't end there. Apparently she called back and used the old "I'm cancelling my serivces!" trick to reach our severely spine lacking retention department who promptly gave her $175 in credits.
I asked my manager if there was any way I could roll those credits back due to what happened earlier (and was clearly noted on the account). She said she doubts it, but she's going to take it to her manager for a final ruling.
I really hate people sometimes.
I get talking to this guy who claims he is a lawyer. He wants to upgrade one of the lines on his account but he's past due. Our policy does not allow upgrades on past due accounts. Our system will NOT let us do them, there are no exceptions or overrides. His argument was that because he'd made an agreement with us to pay the balance a couple of weeks from now his account was not in a true past due status and he should be allowed up upgrade.
Of course I explained to him that no, it doesn't work like that.
He then refers me to our lengthy customer service agreement on the <red checkmark> site and asks me to point out to him the SPECIFIC section that states this is not allowed.
I told him it's the standard upgrade policy that states you can't do it if it's past due. Past due means past due, it doesn't matter if you have an agreement to pay later, the outstsanding balance is still PAST DUE.
I am WRONG! He says. In his legal opinion since he has a standing arrangement to pay the bill he is NOT past due and we are required (his word not mine) to allow him to do this upgrade. If we do not we are apparently in violation of some kind FCC regulations or federal laws , etc, etc.
At this point I'm done with him and I tell him straight up the policy is the policy regardless of how it is worded online. Past due is Past due is Past due and he can't upgrade. If he still wants to dispute it, here's the number to Legal.
Verified idiot
Lady calls in upset because apparently we messed up something up on her account. Okay, I'm sorry about that and I can fix it for you no problem. May I have your passcode please?
Oh you don't know the passcode? ....Then it seems we've hit a dead end as I can't make any changes on the account without it.
She says that shouldn't matter because WE made the mistake and therefore SHE shouldn't have to verify anything to fix it. I reiterate that I cannot make ANY changes on the account, even corrective ones, without the passcode.
So then she says that I shouldn't have to verify her again because she called about this same issue last week and the account holder verified then.
Yes, she actually thought that verification on a PREVIOUS CALL was sufficient to verify her this time. Can you imagine if you walked in to a bar and tried to argue that because some other bartender checked your ID there LAST WEEK that they shouldn't have to ID you again this time?
My faith in humanity rapidly fading I explained to her again that I can't do anything without the passcode, no ifs, ands or buts.
Then she told me how much she hated my company and hung up.
Customer standard time strikes again
Another customer, ANOTHER ONE, who wants to restore an Unlimited Data Plan they switched off of in 2014. For those keeping score, this would be the FOURTH such customer in the last few months.
WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE??? Who in their right mind thinks we'll be able to change something like that two or more years after the fact??
You're not fooling anyone
I am speaking to "Bob Smith" from Riverside, California. "Bob Smith" wants to order three brand new iPhones for some of his lines with priority shipping.
Oh and did I mention "Bob Smith" also has a very thick indian accent and is apparently surrounded by other people with indian accents based on the background noise on the call?
Did I also mention "Bob Smith" wants these new iphones shipped to an address in New Jersey??
Oh I'm sorry Mr. Smith, it seems our ordering system just went down on us...what a shame.
I'm afraid you'll have to call back later or go to one of our <red checkmark> stores to get your phones.
Mr. Smith...Mr. Smith are you still there?
*CLICK*
And that was about the point I plastered that account with fraud notes.
What do you think this is, Judge Judy?
I get a lot of dumb requests for credits, but this has to be one of the dumbest. Woman had her account suspended for non pay, allegedly due to an error on our part but I can find no evidence of any such error.
That said, it's the last call of the day and I can see this account has been with us for 14 years. She's able to pay the full balance (I always find it amazing how QUICKLY customers can come up with money when their phones get shut off. Imagine that!) So I decide to be really nice and waive the reconnection fee for her.
Of course, you know the name of this site so obviously this doesn't end here.
She proceeds to tell me she would like some additional credits due to...wait for it....
Pain and Suffering.
Yes folks! She wants more credit because of how horrible a time she endured with her phones being cutoff because she didn't pay her bill.
And to make this even more ridiculous, the total time her phones were disconnected for? 37 minutes.
Appparently, it was the most awful and torturous 37 minutes of her life beacuse she is VERY serious about this credit. I politely explain to her I've already waived the reconnect fee when I could have let it stand and a 37 minute outage of her own making isn't really justification for additional credits.
Suddenly she goes completely ballistic on me and demands my manager.
As it turns out my manager didn't give her anything extra either.
But the story doesn't end there. Apparently she called back and used the old "I'm cancelling my serivces!" trick to reach our severely spine lacking retention department who promptly gave her $175 in credits.
I asked my manager if there was any way I could roll those credits back due to what happened earlier (and was clearly noted on the account). She said she doubts it, but she's going to take it to her manager for a final ruling.
I really hate people sometimes.
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