Never any letup in the SCs at Red Checkmark...
Thanks Samsung! or How I learned to quit worrying and love the iPhone
So I'm sure most of you are aware of the recent recall/craptastrophe surrounding the Note 7. Basically, the things have been ruled a potential fire hazard and so Red Checkmark gracious put out a very flexible exchange policy. Basically if you had one of these devices you could exchange it for something else at no cost or keep it and use it at your own peril.
We can't really BE much more flexible here. You can literally exchange your Note 7 for ANY OTHER PHONE THAT WE CARRY. In addition, we are also offering a one time account credit as we recognize its time out of the customers day to return to the store and complete the exchange. How can we get SCs with that right? Well...
- First there was the guy who wanted me to permanently credit his account almost $1000 for the Note 7 in addition to getting a device exchange because we "sold him a f**king death trap".
- Then I had the lady who was "insulted" by our "meager" credit offer and immediately requested we triple it or she's going to Fast Run wireless.
- Then there was the guy who wanted me to not only transfer him to the CEO of Samsung (a completely different company), he also wanted me to somehow accomplish this WITHOUT putting him on hold.
- Then there were several people I talked to, all butthurt that Best Buy was being comabtive in honoring device exchanges at their store. I admit, these people have a right to be pissed off but when you purchased the phone at BEST BUY you need to take it up with them, not hassle us for credits and freebies. One of them even said he would "f**k up" the Best Buy manager if he wasn't allowed his exchange.
- And last but not least, the conspiracy theorists. There's been a lot of false/misleading information about this recall in the media and we don't exactly keep the TVs in the break room constantly tuned to CNN, MSNBC and Fox News so we're not privy to every new story or article that gets released.
The conspiracy theorists are of ours convinced that the phones are having issues NOT because of a manufacturing problem but because this is part of a deliberate effort by Samsung to eliminate certain high ranking individuals around the world (while making it look accidental of course!), funded entirely by some kind of UN shadow government cabal run by close associates of Barack Obama. You can't make this stuff up folks!
I am many things, stupid is not one of them
This one sent my red flags up from the beginning. Dude is triyng to activate a phone that he claims he bought off someone on Facebook but happens to be flagged as stolen. Funny that.
So, being the good manager I am, I thoroughly research the situation and discover something interesting: The serial number on the device in question matches one we sent him back in June. One that in fact, he told us he never got. Packages of course do get stolen off door steps and front porches but how odd that he suddenly has this phone that was apparently "lost" in transit? I wonder how that could have happened?
I go over all of this with him and vehemently denies everything, sticking to the Facebook story and cussing me out because I won't activate this phone.
Sorry buddy, game over and consider your account now flagged for Fraud/Equipment Gaming. Have fun with that.
(Low) Valued Customers
I've come to develop a healthy dislike for our prepaid customers. Well okay, SOME of our prepaid customers. I'm sure there are some sane people who use prepaid phones but I find my most entitled, whiny SC types are frequently prepaid.
Thus, I can only l laugh when they talk about how much of a "valued" customer they are and how much money they spend with us. I mean seriously, you're on a prepaid plan for $30 or $45/month. Yeah, that's so valuable, we'd be so hurt if you took your business elsewhere. Whatever would we do without your chump change going in our account each month??
Needless to say, I still treat these people nicely but the fact is, prepaid is prepaid. The policies are the policies and I'm not afforded the flexibiity for exceptions like I am with postpaid. Don't like the rules? Tough. Either go postpaid or accept the fact that prepaid is what it is.
The Steve Jobs Experience
Quick way to get on my shitlist: Call me up and throw an insane tantrum because of the high price of the iPhone 7 and the new fancy shmancy wireless headphones. After approximately 10 minutes of venting with liberal use of the F-word, tell me you "refuse to be treated like a bitch" and, given your history with us, you fully expect a deep discount on these products when they release.
How about NO!
Sorry, champ. Apple sets the prices for their products and we can't discount them because of our agreements with them. I can't drop the price of an iPhone even ONE PENNY let alone however "deep" this guy was looking for.
And now you're threatening to go to Death Star Wireless.
Well guess what dude? All carriers that offer the iPhone are bound by the Apple sales agreement, they can't give you a lower price either but by all means feel free to try.
Also, I'm more than happy to give you Apples number if you want to call them to complain.
And after that he hung up. I guess maybe I should consider myself lucky he didn't demand I transfer him to Tim Cook.
Urge to kill rising...
This annoying, snotty woman I had the displeasure of speaking to last week was one of the worst SCs I've had in awhile. Of course, I can't see these people but judging by her voice and disposition she was early to mid 20s and very much a spoiled rich kid type.
Situation: She dropped her phone and broke it, but she doesn't have insurance. Thus, her only options are upgrade, add a line or third party (Amazon, Ebay,Craigslist, etc.).
I explain this to her...
SC: So that means I'd have to like, pay money right?
Me: Yes, there would be a cost associated with these options.
SC: I don't understand why I have to like, pay money for the phone. We pay you guys hundreds of dollars each month.
Me: Your phone is broken and you do not have insurance. Of course, even if you had insurance there would be a deductible involved so either way you'd have to pay something.
SC: That's bullshit.
Me: Excuse me?
SC: What are you, deaf? I said that's bullshit. My daddy has been with you guys for like, 15 years and I'm sure he's spent thousands of thousands of dollars in that time. You need to give me a phone.
Me: I'm more than happy to assist you in ordering one but as I said, there would be a charge.
SC: No there won't.
Me: Yes, there will.
SC: Look, I don't think you realize who you are talking to, my daddy is the CEO at [tech company I've barely heard of] and he's got a lot of money and he can freaking ruin you. You need to give me a phone.
Me: Only if you pay for it.
SC: You know what? You're rude and unhelpful. I'm going to have my daddy call back and make you people give me a phone. He'll do it, you watch.
Me: He's welcome to try.
SC: Screw you. *CLICK*
Lord help me if I ever meet this woman in real life...
Thanks Samsung! or How I learned to quit worrying and love the iPhone
So I'm sure most of you are aware of the recent recall/craptastrophe surrounding the Note 7. Basically, the things have been ruled a potential fire hazard and so Red Checkmark gracious put out a very flexible exchange policy. Basically if you had one of these devices you could exchange it for something else at no cost or keep it and use it at your own peril.
We can't really BE much more flexible here. You can literally exchange your Note 7 for ANY OTHER PHONE THAT WE CARRY. In addition, we are also offering a one time account credit as we recognize its time out of the customers day to return to the store and complete the exchange. How can we get SCs with that right? Well...
- First there was the guy who wanted me to permanently credit his account almost $1000 for the Note 7 in addition to getting a device exchange because we "sold him a f**king death trap".
- Then I had the lady who was "insulted" by our "meager" credit offer and immediately requested we triple it or she's going to Fast Run wireless.
- Then there was the guy who wanted me to not only transfer him to the CEO of Samsung (a completely different company), he also wanted me to somehow accomplish this WITHOUT putting him on hold.

- Then there were several people I talked to, all butthurt that Best Buy was being comabtive in honoring device exchanges at their store. I admit, these people have a right to be pissed off but when you purchased the phone at BEST BUY you need to take it up with them, not hassle us for credits and freebies. One of them even said he would "f**k up" the Best Buy manager if he wasn't allowed his exchange.
- And last but not least, the conspiracy theorists. There's been a lot of false/misleading information about this recall in the media and we don't exactly keep the TVs in the break room constantly tuned to CNN, MSNBC and Fox News so we're not privy to every new story or article that gets released.
The conspiracy theorists are of ours convinced that the phones are having issues NOT because of a manufacturing problem but because this is part of a deliberate effort by Samsung to eliminate certain high ranking individuals around the world (while making it look accidental of course!), funded entirely by some kind of UN shadow government cabal run by close associates of Barack Obama. You can't make this stuff up folks!

I am many things, stupid is not one of them
This one sent my red flags up from the beginning. Dude is triyng to activate a phone that he claims he bought off someone on Facebook but happens to be flagged as stolen. Funny that.

So, being the good manager I am, I thoroughly research the situation and discover something interesting: The serial number on the device in question matches one we sent him back in June. One that in fact, he told us he never got. Packages of course do get stolen off door steps and front porches but how odd that he suddenly has this phone that was apparently "lost" in transit? I wonder how that could have happened?

I go over all of this with him and vehemently denies everything, sticking to the Facebook story and cussing me out because I won't activate this phone.
Sorry buddy, game over and consider your account now flagged for Fraud/Equipment Gaming. Have fun with that.

(Low) Valued Customers
I've come to develop a healthy dislike for our prepaid customers. Well okay, SOME of our prepaid customers. I'm sure there are some sane people who use prepaid phones but I find my most entitled, whiny SC types are frequently prepaid.
Thus, I can only l laugh when they talk about how much of a "valued" customer they are and how much money they spend with us. I mean seriously, you're on a prepaid plan for $30 or $45/month. Yeah, that's so valuable, we'd be so hurt if you took your business elsewhere. Whatever would we do without your chump change going in our account each month??

Needless to say, I still treat these people nicely but the fact is, prepaid is prepaid. The policies are the policies and I'm not afforded the flexibiity for exceptions like I am with postpaid. Don't like the rules? Tough. Either go postpaid or accept the fact that prepaid is what it is.
The Steve Jobs Experience
Quick way to get on my shitlist: Call me up and throw an insane tantrum because of the high price of the iPhone 7 and the new fancy shmancy wireless headphones. After approximately 10 minutes of venting with liberal use of the F-word, tell me you "refuse to be treated like a bitch" and, given your history with us, you fully expect a deep discount on these products when they release.
How about NO!
Sorry, champ. Apple sets the prices for their products and we can't discount them because of our agreements with them. I can't drop the price of an iPhone even ONE PENNY let alone however "deep" this guy was looking for.
And now you're threatening to go to Death Star Wireless.
Well guess what dude? All carriers that offer the iPhone are bound by the Apple sales agreement, they can't give you a lower price either but by all means feel free to try.
Also, I'm more than happy to give you Apples number if you want to call them to complain.
And after that he hung up. I guess maybe I should consider myself lucky he didn't demand I transfer him to Tim Cook.

Urge to kill rising...
This annoying, snotty woman I had the displeasure of speaking to last week was one of the worst SCs I've had in awhile. Of course, I can't see these people but judging by her voice and disposition she was early to mid 20s and very much a spoiled rich kid type.
Situation: She dropped her phone and broke it, but she doesn't have insurance. Thus, her only options are upgrade, add a line or third party (Amazon, Ebay,Craigslist, etc.).
I explain this to her...
SC: So that means I'd have to like, pay money right?
Me: Yes, there would be a cost associated with these options.
SC: I don't understand why I have to like, pay money for the phone. We pay you guys hundreds of dollars each month.
Me: Your phone is broken and you do not have insurance. Of course, even if you had insurance there would be a deductible involved so either way you'd have to pay something.
SC: That's bullshit.
Me: Excuse me?
SC: What are you, deaf? I said that's bullshit. My daddy has been with you guys for like, 15 years and I'm sure he's spent thousands of thousands of dollars in that time. You need to give me a phone.
Me: I'm more than happy to assist you in ordering one but as I said, there would be a charge.
SC: No there won't.
Me: Yes, there will.
SC: Look, I don't think you realize who you are talking to, my daddy is the CEO at [tech company I've barely heard of] and he's got a lot of money and he can freaking ruin you. You need to give me a phone.
Me: Only if you pay for it.
SC: You know what? You're rude and unhelpful. I'm going to have my daddy call back and make you people give me a phone. He'll do it, you watch.
Me: He's welcome to try.
SC: Screw you. *CLICK*
Lord help me if I ever meet this woman in real life...

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