Tweet
So I've actually been posting sucky customer stories for a long time, just not here. I'd like to share some of my experiences. I'll start from my older forum posts, and if you guys enjoy, over time move in to more recent experiences.
This first post was originally posted on the ld4all forums. At the time I sold appliances (think fridges and dishwashers). This was during an Energy Star tax-free weekend.
__________________________________________________ _____
It's the energy star tax week, which means anyone dealing with appliance customers has to deal with possibly the most idiotic people on the face of the planet... this is a preview of what I am dealing with on a daily basis.
Customer 1.
Customer: "What are all of these tags for $140 you have on the dishwashers?"
Me: "That's for the government rebate, but you would have had to have already signed up for it."
C: "Well why do you have it up if I can't get it anymore?"
I'm getting a sinking feeling...
Me: "It's for the people that do have it, so they know which ones qualify."
C: "Well they should already know about it! You need to take these signs down!"
Me: "No, because different items get different amounts back. It makes things easier for all of us."
C: "You know what this is? False advertising!"
I'm sorry ma'am, we should have taken into account the fact that you were too lazy to get up at 7 a.m. on a Thursday to sign up for the rebate when it first came out. Here, let me make things more inconvenient for our customers who are actually going to be buying things just because the little neon $140 sign upsets you. Is that good? Would a hug help?
Customer 2.
Quick background, our appliance department is right in front of the up escalator. We stand toward the front so if anyone needs help, we can assist them. Occasionally we are all free, resulting in several associates near the front. For whatever reason, most customers think this is perfect material for their new stand up comedy routine.
C: "Oh wow. I see you're all working hard. Gwahaha!"
Ah, yes. A real knee slapper, sir. Very original, not a single soul has ever said that to me. Allow me to congratulate you on your witty comment. Well done, I'll be seeing you on the Comedy Central soon, I'm sure.
Customer 3.
Me: answers phone "[Company] appliances, this is Rhewin how can I help you?"
C: "Oh wow, someone actually answered."
Me: "Oh I'm sorry, have you been trying to get through for a while?"
C: "No, this is my first call."
Me: "Oh, all right. What can I help you with?"
C: "Huh?"
Me: "What did you need help with today?"
C: "Oh, nothing. I just wanted to see if the number from your website worked."
Me: "..."
C "... [click]"
Customer 4.
C: "Wow, are you all here to help me? Gwaha!"
Seriously, you're toying with forces you can't imagine. Need I remind you that the up escalator is right behind you? One shove and its and endless fall backwards.
Customer 5.
Me: "Ok, so I've processed the return, it'll be refunded back to the credit card ending in 9910."
C: "What? Why?"
Uh-oh.
Me: "Um, you are returning this item, yes?"
C: "Yeah."
Me: "Ok, so its refunding back to the original payment, which is the card that ends in 9910."
C: "No."
Me: "You don't... want a refund?"
C: "I only pay in cash."
Me: "So you don't have a card that ends in 9910?"
C: "No."
Me: "Can I see your receipt... ok, it shows right here on the receipt that you used a card."
C: "No."
...that's not a valid response. I'm very confused. When did I ask a yes or no question?
Me: "So why does it say that you used a card?"
C: "No."
Bad command or file name:
Abort Retry Fail? ___________
Me: "Sir, we can't change what it says on the receipt. If you had paid in cash it would have said cash."
C: "No."
Are you... stupid? Maybe you're talking to someone on the phone. Yeah, that must be it. It's one of those awkward conversations where you spend like 5 minutes speaking to someone only to find out that they have an earpiece on. I guess this was all one big misunderstanding. Ah, good times.
Me: "Maybe you have a debit card you used as credit?"
C: "No."
Me: "Ok... so why does it say you used a credit card?"
C: "I only pay in cash."
Me: "Do you have a debit card?"
C: "Yes."
Me: "May I see it?"
C: *grumbles* [pulls out debit card]
Me: "Ok, see here? It ends in 9910. It was probable run as credit.
C: [confused look on face, then slaps forehead and laughs] "Oooohhh, Ok. I get it now. You meant did I have a debit card I used as credit."
...I hate you.
This first post was originally posted on the ld4all forums. At the time I sold appliances (think fridges and dishwashers). This was during an Energy Star tax-free weekend.
__________________________________________________ _____
It's the energy star tax week, which means anyone dealing with appliance customers has to deal with possibly the most idiotic people on the face of the planet... this is a preview of what I am dealing with on a daily basis.
Customer 1.
Customer: "What are all of these tags for $140 you have on the dishwashers?"
Me: "That's for the government rebate, but you would have had to have already signed up for it."
C: "Well why do you have it up if I can't get it anymore?"
I'm getting a sinking feeling...
Me: "It's for the people that do have it, so they know which ones qualify."
C: "Well they should already know about it! You need to take these signs down!"
Me: "No, because different items get different amounts back. It makes things easier for all of us."
C: "You know what this is? False advertising!"
I'm sorry ma'am, we should have taken into account the fact that you were too lazy to get up at 7 a.m. on a Thursday to sign up for the rebate when it first came out. Here, let me make things more inconvenient for our customers who are actually going to be buying things just because the little neon $140 sign upsets you. Is that good? Would a hug help?
Customer 2.
Quick background, our appliance department is right in front of the up escalator. We stand toward the front so if anyone needs help, we can assist them. Occasionally we are all free, resulting in several associates near the front. For whatever reason, most customers think this is perfect material for their new stand up comedy routine.
C: "Oh wow. I see you're all working hard. Gwahaha!"
Ah, yes. A real knee slapper, sir. Very original, not a single soul has ever said that to me. Allow me to congratulate you on your witty comment. Well done, I'll be seeing you on the Comedy Central soon, I'm sure.
Customer 3.
Me: answers phone "[Company] appliances, this is Rhewin how can I help you?"
C: "Oh wow, someone actually answered."
Me: "Oh I'm sorry, have you been trying to get through for a while?"
C: "No, this is my first call."
Me: "Oh, all right. What can I help you with?"
C: "Huh?"
Me: "What did you need help with today?"
C: "Oh, nothing. I just wanted to see if the number from your website worked."
Me: "..."
C "... [click]"
Customer 4.
C: "Wow, are you all here to help me? Gwaha!"
Seriously, you're toying with forces you can't imagine. Need I remind you that the up escalator is right behind you? One shove and its and endless fall backwards.
Customer 5.
Me: "Ok, so I've processed the return, it'll be refunded back to the credit card ending in 9910."
C: "What? Why?"
Uh-oh.
Me: "Um, you are returning this item, yes?"
C: "Yeah."
Me: "Ok, so its refunding back to the original payment, which is the card that ends in 9910."
C: "No."
Me: "You don't... want a refund?"
C: "I only pay in cash."
Me: "So you don't have a card that ends in 9910?"
C: "No."
Me: "Can I see your receipt... ok, it shows right here on the receipt that you used a card."
C: "No."
...that's not a valid response. I'm very confused. When did I ask a yes or no question?
Me: "So why does it say that you used a card?"
C: "No."
Bad command or file name:
Abort Retry Fail? ___________
Me: "Sir, we can't change what it says on the receipt. If you had paid in cash it would have said cash."
C: "No."
Are you... stupid? Maybe you're talking to someone on the phone. Yeah, that must be it. It's one of those awkward conversations where you spend like 5 minutes speaking to someone only to find out that they have an earpiece on. I guess this was all one big misunderstanding. Ah, good times.
Me: "Maybe you have a debit card you used as credit?"
C: "No."
Me: "Ok... so why does it say you used a credit card?"
C: "I only pay in cash."
Me: "Do you have a debit card?"
C: "Yes."
Me: "May I see it?"
C: *grumbles* [pulls out debit card]
Me: "Ok, see here? It ends in 9910. It was probable run as credit.
C: [confused look on face, then slaps forehead and laughs] "Oooohhh, Ok. I get it now. You meant did I have a debit card I used as credit."
...I hate you.
Comment