Misbehavior is NOT a Laughing Matter!

[kerrisan]

I am so sick and tired parents treating a child's misbehavior at school like it's nothing. Well, most of the time, if a parent is told his or her child has misbehaved or sees a behavior report in his or her box, they'll talk to me or my coworker about it and the child will get a lecture right then and there. Any then there's C's daddy . . .

I am afternoon staff, so I come in when the kiddos are waking up from nap. When C wakes up, he has a ton of energy. He is also an only child, the 2nd oldest in the class, and he's very smart - too smart for his own stinkin' good.

I've decided to give him random jobs around the classroom to do to keep him busy/wear him out - help clean the floor after snack, feed the fish, etc. He's been doing pretty well since I implemented this management strategy.

Today right as his father came to pick him up, one of the little girls started screaming. She was pointing at C and said he's pinched her on her back. I looked and sure enough - her back was red. C had a mischievous look on his face. I started lecturing him about it and when I saw his father I explained what happened (when you explain these things to parents, you are not supposed to use the name of the other child. I still said C had pinched "a child", but the father had seen me inspecting her back and already knew who he had pinched).

*Father is speaking to C while standing up, not even looking him in the eye - discipline should be done at the child's level to really be effective*
Father: C, did you pinch Kennedyyyyyyyyyy (name changed)?
C: Noooooooo!
Father: Are you suuuuuuuuure?
C: Yeeeeeeeeees!
Father: Are you supposed to pinch people?
C: Noooooooo!
Father: Ok then. Let's go.

When parents "discipline" like that it makes it that much harder on us teachers to discipline the children. It just tells the children that they are allowed to undermine my authority while they are in my care. Right now my class has BIG problems with sharing toys and pinching/hitting/biting and I have made some progress with that. However, seeing this father's "discipline" methods just made me so angry and made me feel like all the work I have put into his child is in vain. Ugh. Whatever. I'm going to do my best with your child while I have him/her, and if he/she completely undermines you when he/she is older . . . well, I did what I could.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

By any chance, is the kid Italian?

sorry, had to ask...maybe he likes the girl

[kerrisan]

He's 2 - too young to know anything about crushes. He just has no idea how to use words instead of physical means.

[Rolling Star]

How ANNOYING! I get driven totally NUTS when parents discipline their kids like that. >_>

[bigjimaz]

Anybody want to bet that dad is one of those "I neeeeeeeeed it nooooooooow." kinda guys?

[aurelemsrealm]

Shoot, I would have gotten a spanking from my dad if a teacher told him I behaved like that at school. I hate parents who don't discipline their children when they're misbehaving in public. I just want to box the parents around until they come to their senses.

I remember at a previous job that I made a woman mad because her child was being a brat, and I told her that she could make her child mind or they could leave because I was tired of watching him tear the store apart. I flat out told her that she needs to learn how to discipline her child if she can't make him mind any better than that in public. She said she was going to complain to the manager. Oh please, that threat never works on me. I would have had to give a crap about keeping my low paying job first. I told her my name, the manager's name, and that the manager would be working 7 a.m.-4 p.m., the next day. I never heard anything from the manager about it.

At my current job, my manager just usually says the customers can go somewhere else if they don't like the rules here. She doesn't cave in to them just because they're "customers." They have to be good, loyal regular customers that we see everyday and like before she really takes their complaints seriously. It's kind of funny.

[rerant]

Just because the kid is more or less still a baby doesn't mean he needs to be spoken to like one.
Nothing angers me more than parents who baby-talk to their kids, expecially when they're doing it when they should be diciplining them.

I strongly believe that baby-talk breeds stupidity.
My parents would (apparently) get LIVID at anyone who spoke to me or my brother like that when we were babies.
"My children aren't retarded, thank you," my mother would say.

[Sofar]

*Father is speaking to C while standing up, not even looking him in the eye - discipline should be done at the child's level to really be effective*
Father: C, did you pinch Kennedyyyyyyyyyy (name changed)?
C: Noooooooo!
Father: Are you suuuuuuuuure?
C: Yeeeeeeeeees!
Father: Are you supposed to pinch people?
C: Noooooooo!
Father: Ok then. Let's go.

Lovely. Now he knows how well lying works. Once a kid learns something like that it's hard to make them unlearn.

I strongly believe that baby-talk breeds stupidity.
My parents would (apparently) get LIVID at anyone who spoke to me or my brother like that when we were babies.
"My children aren't retarded, thank you," my mother would say.

I just remember this exchange from my childhood, I'd just gotten my hand caught underneath a windshield wiper:

Friend's mom: "Aww, did Sofar get a nasty boo-boo?"
My mom: "Don't talk like that to my son."

[Catwoman2965]

Don't even get me started on the subject of undisciplined kids...My favorite is when you're out somewhere, the kid is acting up, and doing things they shouldn't and the parents simply say 'stop that' or "don't do that" yeah, right, like that's going to get them to stop.

And how about the parents who are shopping, while leaving their little darlings to wander around the store, unsupervised?

[kerrisan]

Lovely. Now he knows how well lying works.

Oh, trust me, most of them (if not all) already know. Luckily I've learned how to decipher it. I get alot of this exchange:

*Child 1 gets pushed/hit/whatever, starts crying*

Me: Child 2, why did you hit Child 1?
Child 2: I didn't! Nooooooo!!!
Me: I just saw you hit him/her; don't lie to me. *or* Can you look at me and say that?
Child 2: *looks around blankly*

[Andara Bledin]

Just because the kid is more or less still a baby doesn't mean he needs to be spoken to like one.
Nothing angers me more than parents who baby-talk to their kids, expecially when they're doing it when they should be diciplining them.

I strongly believe that baby-talk breeds stupidity.
My parents would (apparently) get LIVID at anyone who spoke to me or my brother like that when we were babies.
"My children aren't retarded, thank you," my mother would say.

Quoted for truth.

Kids are smarter than most adults. They're little information sponges. They just don't have the experience to really process most of it without a little help.

^-.-^

[Sofar]

Me: Child 2, why did you hit Child 1?
Child 2: I didn't! Nooooooo!!!
Me: I just saw you hit him/her; don't lie to me. *or* Can you look at me and say that?
Child 2: *looks around blankly*

Great, now they can't even lie well. I've always been able to look someone in the eye and lie to him.

[AFpheonix]

Don't even get me started on the subject of undisciplined kids...My favorite is when you're out somewhere, the kid is acting up, and doing things they shouldn't and the parents simply say 'stop that' or "don't do that" yeah, right, like that's going to get them to stop.

I think the worst one I ever saw was when I was at the High Desert Museum many years back. There was a boy about 13 or so who had really hit his brother pretty hard, so his mom called him on it. He then started spewing profanity at her and spitting in her direction, and her response was not to grab him by the ear and drag him out, but to screetch at him from afar. It was very uncomfortable for all bystanders.

Quoted for truth.

Kids are smarter than most adults. They're little information sponges. They just don't have the experience to really process most of it without a little help.

^-.-^

To a point. When you get people who sit there and use huge words at their kids, I think they get to a point where they just tune out. Just speak simply and clearly at an age appropriate level.

And cooing at a baby isn't a bad thing.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

My kid is quite dismayed to discover that Time Out exists in so many places around town. Even at Nonni and Poppa's house. Just last Tuesday night I found myself sitting on the floor in the empty back of a restaurant with her, in heels and stockings and a business blazer. She was pretty suprised.

My kid pinches. She's not even 2 yet. And she's very quickly learning that punishment is immediate and non-negotiable no matter WHO or WHERE she is. Her behavior is improving. Kids are not stupid. But some parents sure are.

[blas]

Screw baby talk.

I have a friend who uses it with her bf all the time, like for punishment when he's "bad" (doesn't call on time, etc, whatever). It hurts my head and makes my ears want to bleed.

People at work use it on me too.

"Blas, are you suuuuuure?"
"Do you neeeed hellllp?"
"Are you suuuuure?"

I've said it before and I'll say it again, just because I'm blonde, young and beautiful doesn't mean I'm fucking retarded. Don't talk to me like a two year old and I'll show some respect.