The kids sukith too

[gattacandy]

I used to work at a supermarket for about four years, and I got some bad kids. I only heard three kids ever say please for anything, usually it was just demands. I'm not kidding, three kids in almost four years said "please" when they asked for something.

There were also three incidents involving kids that really stuck out for me.

One was a little girl hell bent on doing the opposite of everything her dad said. No joke. He said "don't" she immediately did. This didn't technically cause me hell, but instead a great deal of amused disgust. At one point she was leaning on the handle bars with her mouth on it.

Me: You might not want to put your mouth there. The carts sit outside in the rain and weather and we never wash them.

She looks me dead in the eye, holds the gaze, and proceeds to wrap her mouth around that handle bars like it's the best treat she's ever had, ALL THE WHILE keeping eye contact. I can't imagine what my face look like in response.

Even though I had warned her about the .... germ risk, I had been very careful to not comment at all towards her in general. I learned the hard way that even agreeing with a parent is dangerous, because they might be insanely crazy or the person behind them might be. There was one woman and man with a child who was trying to STAND UP in the front part of the cart (where you're supposed to sit) and moving about. Very dangerous, but the mom was already trying to tell him to sit. So I thought, innocently enough, that I could help her out. That I would be HELPING her keep her child safe by reinforcing her direction.

Me: You might want to sit down and listen to your mom. You could fall out and crack your head, which would be really bad.

Now, maybe I shouldn't have chosen the word "crack "I guess. That's all that I can figure out about what happened next, because she barked at her husband that she needed to go for a minute and apparently found my manager and cursed at her about my statement. I'm not sure what she was so mad about, me reinforcing her orders to her kid, the implication of danger, choice of words, me being happy and cheerful maybe? None of the above merited an angry cursing streak though! My boss simply said I should have not said anything to her. Meanwhile, I was trying to talk to her husband while I was finishing ringing him up and I remember thinking, "He's such a sad looking guy." Now I know why.

The last kid is probably the saddest of the stories though. His greeting to me when his mom pushed the cart in the lane was "Hey Baby". I didn't like a six year old opening a conversation with me with those words, so I completely ignored him. He repeats himself and again, I ignored it.

His next words: "Hey Bitch."

The only thing more shocking than hearing that, was the fact that all his mother did was kinda cover his mouth and stand there silently. She didn't do ANYTHING but hold her hand in front of his mouth.No apology for what he called me, no correcting of his behavior, nothing! I wondered at what kind of home he must live in that when he sees a woman he doesn't know, he calls them baby, and when they don't answer him or respond the way he wants them too, he calls them bitch.

[Best Made Tacos]

...

I wondered at what kind of home he must live in that when he sees a woman he doesn't know, he calls them baby, and when they don't answer him or respond the way he wants them too, he calls them bitch.

That is awful! It would be nice to think that you could give the kid a well deserved shock by responding with immediate hairy eye-ball contact and saying in a controlled but deadly tone "What did you just call me?" but if he's coming from a home where abusive profanities are common, then he has possibly learned to be completely unintimidated by anything except physical force.

A good friend of mine had neighbours who could regularly be heard screaming every name under the sun at their young children. These class-act human beings would tell their 8 year old daughter "You were a mistake, I wish you had never been born, you little c***."

The ones on the other side just expose their newborn, toddler and primary school kids to large amounts of marijuana smoke, loud (like, vibrating across three houses loud) adult themed music, screaming drunken fights and gropings until 3am in the morning. I know, because I've been over there to ask them to turn their music down (it's a fortnightly occurence) - and they didn't even try to hide the large amounts of drugs on the kitchen bench

Sorry, just had to rant a bit there. I hate to see kids exposed to this stuff, not least because when they copy their parents language and behaviour, as kids do, they will bear the consequences for such behaviour when it's the rat bag parents who should be punished! Not to let the kids off scot-free, but I can't entirely blame them when they're so young.

Here's hoping that 6 year old grows up and turns out OK, in spite of the other influences in his life.

[aurelemsrealm]

If I'd have spoken to an adult like that in front of either of my parents at 6 years old, you can bet I would have tasted the back of their hand and told to show respect to adults. They just didn't tolerate such behavior, period.

[Gabrielle Proctor]

In the old days, if you were rude to an adult, any adult, they would smack you in the mouth. No matter who they were.

I live in a backwoods area where you can reprimand other people's kids. And those kids are praying that you don't tell their parents too, double punishment. Unfortunately, 40 miles south, around the area I work(it's a wealthier area), there are these soccer moms that don't dicipline their kids and you can't either. If they act up in your store and you tell them to cut it out, you're the one getting yelled at because the kid tattled on YOU. Quite different from where I grew up, it used to be the other way around.

[BookstoreEscapee]

God I hate those people. They yell at their kids who don't listen and then the moment you say a word you are the bad guy and how dare you yell at my kid. I was at cashwrap one day at Store1 and there was a little girl about 2yo who was playing with the velvet ropes that mark off the line. These are the kind that hook onto 2 heavy metal stanchions; she's leaning on the rope and pushing it back and forth like a swing and tilting the stanchions closer and closer to her head. Her mother was talking to my other cashier (not even being rung up, just asking about a book) about 10 feet away and kept turning and telling the girl to stop it but never actually going over to her and pulling her away. There were no other customers so I was just watching the girl, and after several "Stop it!"s I finally said in a very calm voice, "Please don't play with that, sweetie" and her mother turns to me and barks "Why?!" I just looked at her for a few seconds with my eyebrows raised, speechless. I refrained from saying what I really wanted to which was something along the lines of "Because I don't want to get blamed for not saying something when she gets hurt and you sue the store."

[Sharsarannon]

A good friend of mine had neighbours who could regularly be heard screaming every name under the sun at their young children. These class-act human beings would tell their 8 year old daughter "You were a mistake, I wish you had never been born, you little c***."

The ones on the other side just expose their newborn, toddler and primary school kids to large amounts of marijuana smoke, loud (like, vibrating across three houses loud) adult themed music, screaming drunken fights and gropings until 3am in the morning. I know, because I've been over there to ask them to turn their music down (it's a fortnightly occurence) - and they didn't even try to hide the large amounts of drugs on the kitchen bench

I seriously hope, and pray, literally, that you have called CPS on at least the druggy drunken abusive ones. Really. Save those children from a lifetime of pain and hell. Please.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

The last kid is probably the saddest of the stories though. His greeting to me when his mom pushed the cart in the lane was "Hey Baby". I didn't like a six year old opening a conversation with me with those words, so I completely ignored him. He repeats himself and again, I ignored it.

His next words: "Hey Bitch."

/shudders

Had I said that word out in public with my parents, I wouldn't have known what hit me.

When he's older, he'll be using that same language when trying to pick up girls. Mommy sure isn't teaching him that isn't an appropriate thing to say to a female.

[Rolling Star]

The last kid is probably the saddest of the stories though. His greeting to me when his mom pushed the cart in the lane was "Hey Baby". I didn't like a six year old opening a conversation with me with those words, so I completely ignored him. He repeats himself and again, I ignored it.

His next words: "Hey Bitch."

I would have beat the snot out of that little kid if I was his mother. You have to wonder what kind of environment he's been exposed to.

[Amethyst Hunter]

Threads like these only enforce my dislike of children (and their parents) and makes my decision to be childfree only that much more satisfying.

Me too. ( to a fellow CFer)

I second the call to CPS about the kids trapped in the Hell House.

[Best Made Tacos]

Me too. ( to a fellow CFer)

I second the call to CPS about the kids trapped in the Hell House.

The screaming swearing neighbours have since left, but the druggy ones remain.

For those concerned, I did make the call and relayed what I heard and saw after the 'party till 5am' night. They thanked me, made notes of it and took my details - they said this was the first report they had 'at that address' but as these people had just moved down from Sydney and I don't know their surnames, couldn't rule out the possibility that they could already be known to social services.

Social services also advised me to call the police next time they have a really loud party past 11pm, and the chances are that the cops will catch them with the drugs red handed and see the kids wandering around being exposed to them and take action. I strongly suspect the father is a dealer, from what he has said to me, but I don't have any proof beyond what they said to me and what I saw in their house.
My concern is that it's my close friends place, and although I am over there nearly every weekend, it is not MY place - any friction between his neighbours will affect him, not me.

I'm sort of torn - the kids in this house atleast have 2 parents to care for them, the father works and the house isn't in total squalor, plus the kids appear to be attending school. I see them bouncing around in their backyard on their trampoline and they wave to me when I pass - they seem happy enough and appear to be properly fed and clothed. I don't know anything much about the foster system, or the consequences of them being investigated by the child welfare department. If I saw signs of abuse of the type exhibited by the previous neighbour then I would not hesitate to report them at the next opportunity. I was polite to them and they invited me to come over and see them again, but I really don't want to be near them, as the man got extremely sleazy towards me (with his wife in the next room, no less) and made some strange offer about helping me out 'if I wanted to earn some money' (!)

I'll have to wait and see, I guess - I left my details with welfare and said I was willing to answer further questions and be contacted if anything developed. Not sure if there's anything further I can do...

[iradney]

The last kid is probably the saddest of the stories though. His greeting to me when his mom pushed the cart in the lane was "Hey Baby". I didn't like a six year old opening a conversation with me with those words, so I completely ignored him. He repeats himself and again, I ignored it.

His next words: "Hey Bitch."

If my Mom had been there, she would've torn his mother a new one. In fact, a SET of new ones, with matching shoes and handbags.
If I had EVER said anything like that in my Mom's presence, I would've been subjected to the Icy Cold Glare Of Doom (TM), a 2 hour lecture about morals, principles and respect and quite possibly more Icy Cold Glares of Doom. Those things were vicious man....*shudder*

[Becks]

Me: You might not want to put your mouth there. The carts sit outside in the rain and weather and we never wash them.

She looks me dead in the eye, holds the gaze, and proceeds to wrap her mouth around that handle bars like it's the best treat she's ever had, ALL THE WHILE keeping eye contact. I can't imagine what my face look like in response.

I've seen and heard that children today are precocious, but isn't she a bit too young to show that kind of...talent?

[Marxfan]

Quoth mae
Threads like these only enforce my dislike of children (and their parents) and makes my decision to be childfree only that much more satisfying.

Me too. ( to a fellow CFer)

Me three! Me and the fiancee, it's just dogs for us! At least they greet you when you come home...

But I'm appalled at gattacandy's story. Hell, I'm 25 years old and my mother still won't let me curse!! Good parenting is a null and void concept, isn't it?

[Ducky Dew]

It infuriates me to hear/see things like this. Yes, parenting is hard work, it's constant work, but it is so worth it to do it right! Whatever else I do with my life, I know that being a good mom is the most important job I will ever have.

To add another scary thought to the topic, the OP's stories deal with young children, can imagine what they're going to be like as teens? *shudders* If you can't control them at that age, you'll certainly have no control at all when they're older and the misbehaving takes on even more dangerous tones.

It always gives me mixed emotions when someone compliments me on my kids. I feel proud, of course, knowing that the hard work is paying off and that I'm raising kids who will be an asset to their community. It still surprises me, then makes me rather sad, that it seems to be so uncommon for kids to have manners today that people actually find it worth commenting on.

[Der Cute]

I once had a little munchkin about 2.5 yrs old curse the F and the MF bomb at me in one mispronounced sentence.

Since he was the munchkin my friend was babysitting, I had a bit of authority over him. Little guy was hungry, don't blame him, but he came into the kitchen telling me "I want a g-damn mf-ing cracker".

I raised one eyebrow, looked at him very seriously (by now he KNEW he'd screwed up) and told him "WHAT DID YOU SAY?"

He had the chutzpah to repeat it to me. (I chuckle now, at this memory).
I then frogmarched his butt into the living room and told his babysitter/ my friend what he had said, and told him to NEVER EVER SAY THAT AGAIN TO ADULTS, AND TO APOLOGIZE TO ALL OF US.

He did, and I said, "Now ask the RIGHT way". He did.

He even said please. .

We squished that bug right off!!

Also figured out the other person watching over Munchkin was using the F and MF and GD language in front of him VERY often. We told her in no uncertain terms to not do this. I think she continued it, but Munchkin never gave me that sass anymore.

Cutenoob