For some reason the calls this week at work have gone straight down the crapper.
Where's everyone's holiday cheer?
(note: this first call is NOT from last week, but I left it out before to keep a previous post from running long)
Darling Daughter, Indeed
This call was from October 18
SC: My daughter lost her phone on the 13th and didn't tell me because she didn't want to get in trouble. Well she fessed up and it looks like whoever had it ran up a pretty high bill.
M: Yes, I am showing almost $500 in usage charges here.
SC: Yeah, I'm going to need a credit for all of that.
As I review the bill, I notice the crazy usage is from the whole bill period, not just from the 13th forward
M: Ok so you said she lost it on the 13th right?
SC: Yeah.
M: Well our standard rule is that the customer is responsible for all charges up until the time the phone is reported lost, but in this case I will make an exception.
SC: Thank you.
M: Ok, so the total credit is $76.20
SC: Ummm, what?
M: The credit will be $76.20
SC: No way, it's got to be way more than that. What's going on here?
M: Well you said she lost it on the 13th and I just reviewed the usage from the 13to the 17th and the total is $76.20
SC: $76.20????
M: Yes, for usage charges across the five days from the 13th to the 17th.
SC: FIVE days??? The phone was lost on SEPTEMBER 13!
M: Your daughter waited over a MONTH to tell you her phone had been swiped by someone and you want us to credit all these charges?
SC: Yeah...she was afraid of getting in trouble for losing it.
M: Oh...just a moment please (review acct with Sup, she was willing to give him the $76.20, but not a whole month's worth of usage because his little angel didnt' fess up). Well I just spoke with my Supervisor and unfortunately if the phone was lost over a month ago we can't offer any more credit on these charges.
SC: Well that sucks...I can't afford this bill...I guess I'll have to cancel.
Ok so you can't afford your phone bill and your solution is to tack on $600 in termination fees? If you say so.
Wheelchairs welcome
M: Unfortunately, I can't offer any credit, these are valid usage charges.
SC: I don't believe this, why not?
M: Well because you've recieved credit for this same issue three times before, you were told if it happened again you'd be responsible for the charges.
SC: This isn't fair, you should help me out, I'm a valid customer!
(right ok, so you should get a credit but poor old Milton in the wheelchair is SOL??)
M: As I said, you have been educated about this before, there will be no credit.
And this my friends, is the future of our society. Be afraid, be very afraid.
I come first!
SC: I was in a <company> store last month going over my bills and one of the reps noticed I am being charged $10/month for unlimited evening and weekend minutes. There must be some kind of error, I already have that in my plan.
M: Well I see here it is included in your plan, the $10 option appears it was for an older plan that didn't include it. I show it's been billing since you changed plans in September of 2006. $10 a month over 14 months would be $140 you've been billed for something you already had.
SC: I can't believe I didn't notice it until now. We need to fix this right away.
Typically for billing errors we go back only 60 days, but I see in the account the customer is one of our more valued ones, so my sup allows me go back SEVEN months and credit $70, I explain this to him.)
SC: Excuse me? Only $70? Oh no no no, I want the whole $140. This is YOUR responsibility, you guys screwed up, you were the ones who made the mistake, you should be the ones who fix it!
M: Well sir, I do understand an error was made when setting up your plan, but it is YOUR responsibility to be checking your bills regularly and contacting us in a timely manner about any errors. It's not our fault it went unnoticed for so long.
SC: I am NOT accepting $70. This was YOUR error! I will not pay for something you guys messed up. I'm the customer, I come FIRST! I want my $140. NOW.
M: Sir, our usual policy is to only go back 60 days, we are going back over THREE times that much for you in this case.
SC: Maybe you didn't hear me. I WANT my $140.
Ok, so he didn't ask directly for a sup, but my sup approved the $70 and this guy wanted more so I didn't know what to do. I escalated it and the sup just told him what I did, that it was his job to check his bills regularly and he wasn't going to get his $140.
This guy pissed me off. How the hell is it OUR fault that you missed an apparent error on your bill for OVER A YEAR?? If you bought something at wal-mart and tried to return it 14 months later because of a defect you just noticed, they'd laugh you out of the place.
Lawyer, Ho!
Gotta love this acct note I came across:
CUST CALLED IN VERY UPSET ABOUT BILLING AND USAGE CHARGES. EDU CUST THOSE ARE VALID CHARGES AND NO CREDIT IS DUE. USED FOUL LANGUAGE AND AGAIN DEMANDED HIS CREDIT. APPARENTLY HAS BEEN HAVING SERVICE PROBLEMS WITH US, THREATENED TO SUE ME IF I HUNG UP ON HIM, THEN DEMANDED TO SPEAK TO SUP, THEN THREATENED TO SUE SUP IF HE DIDN'T GET CREDIT
Suing someone for hanging up on you? Yeah I'd like to see the lawyer who would take that case! Why do customers think a legal threat will IMMEDIATELY make us bow to their wishes?? You would think someone would clue them in that saying they'll talk to a lawyer about it usually won't prompty much of a response.
Say my name, Say my name
This guy was nice enough, but I'll labe him AC for annoying customer, you'll find out in a moment.
M: My name is Steve, how can I help you?
AC: Well Steve, I need to activate a phone.
M: Ok, well I'll need the serial number first, the ESN
AC: Ok Steve, is that on the back of the phone Steve?
M: Yes, underneath the battery.
AC: Sure Steve, I'll just take out the battery. Ok I have the number Steve, it's XXXXXXXXXXX. Did you get that Steve?
M: Yes, now I'll need you to enter the following code into the phone.
AC: Sure Steve, what's the code.
Ok so you get the point, he must've slipped my name in to EVERY SENTENCE he spoke, often more than once. He was a very nice guy, but saying my name over and over really got on my nerves.
Temporary Credit, permanent stupidity
SC: I paid my balance last week of $173 and now you are saying I owe you another $229, what's going on here? That was supposed to be permanent.
M: Ok well I see you were given a temporary credit to restore your service since we were waiting on a phone to be returned. Then a couple of days later, you were given the permanent credit for the phone when we recieved it. You made your payment, then the temporary credit of $229 reversed on to the account.
SC: The $229 was supposed to be permanent, I called to pay my bill and was told my balance was $173, so that's what I paid.
M: You DID get the permanent credit sir.
SC: Evidently I did not because that 229 is back on my account.
M: Ok,let's go over this again. Your account balance was $600 and a bit. There were TWO credits done for 229. One temporary, one permanent. When you called in to pay your balance, BOTH of those credits were still in effect, which is why you were told 173 was your balance. Several days later, the 229 reversed on to your account so your balance reflected the $600 and a bit minus the SINGLE permanent credit you were given for the phone.
SC: Look I called, you told me to pay 173 so I did. I ain't paying a penny more.
M: Whether or not you pay is your choice sir, but if you don't pay your service will be shut off and eventually your account will be cancelled.
SC: I PAID what you told me to PAY. I am NOT paying you any more do you understand me?
M: I do sir, but regardless of if you pay or not, the $229 is a valid charge and will stay on the acct. I did speak to my supervisor about this and she said there is no credit due on the account as the $229 was, as I have told you, a TEMPORARY credit.
SC: Fine, I'm cancelling this whole damn account...and I ain't paying one cent of that $229 , I'll speak to a lawyer if I have to.
M: Very well sir, I will transfer you to cancellations.
I truly wish your lack of intelligence was only a temporary condition but I regret it's obviously of the permanent, debilitating variety. I can only hope to never ever run into you again or else lose even more of my precious brain cells trying to explain a simple concept to you.
Unfortunately cancellations did credit this guy $50 on his totally valid charges, but I guess it was worth it to keep him with us?
Where's everyone's holiday cheer?

(note: this first call is NOT from last week, but I left it out before to keep a previous post from running long)
Darling Daughter, Indeed
This call was from October 18
SC: My daughter lost her phone on the 13th and didn't tell me because she didn't want to get in trouble. Well she fessed up and it looks like whoever had it ran up a pretty high bill.
M: Yes, I am showing almost $500 in usage charges here.
SC: Yeah, I'm going to need a credit for all of that.
As I review the bill, I notice the crazy usage is from the whole bill period, not just from the 13th forward
M: Ok so you said she lost it on the 13th right?
SC: Yeah.
M: Well our standard rule is that the customer is responsible for all charges up until the time the phone is reported lost, but in this case I will make an exception.
SC: Thank you.
M: Ok, so the total credit is $76.20
SC: Ummm, what?
M: The credit will be $76.20
SC: No way, it's got to be way more than that. What's going on here?
M: Well you said she lost it on the 13th and I just reviewed the usage from the 13to the 17th and the total is $76.20
SC: $76.20????
M: Yes, for usage charges across the five days from the 13th to the 17th.
SC: FIVE days??? The phone was lost on SEPTEMBER 13!
M: Your daughter waited over a MONTH to tell you her phone had been swiped by someone and you want us to credit all these charges?
SC: Yeah...she was afraid of getting in trouble for losing it.
M: Oh...just a moment please (review acct with Sup, she was willing to give him the $76.20, but not a whole month's worth of usage because his little angel didnt' fess up). Well I just spoke with my Supervisor and unfortunately if the phone was lost over a month ago we can't offer any more credit on these charges.
SC: Well that sucks...I can't afford this bill...I guess I'll have to cancel.
Ok so you can't afford your phone bill and your solution is to tack on $600 in termination fees? If you say so.
Wheelchairs welcome
M: Unfortunately, I can't offer any credit, these are valid usage charges.
SC: I don't believe this, why not?
M: Well because you've recieved credit for this same issue three times before, you were told if it happened again you'd be responsible for the charges.
SC: This isn't fair, you should help me out, I'm a valid customer!
(right ok, so you should get a credit but poor old Milton in the wheelchair is SOL??)
M: As I said, you have been educated about this before, there will be no credit.
And this my friends, is the future of our society. Be afraid, be very afraid.
I come first!
SC: I was in a <company> store last month going over my bills and one of the reps noticed I am being charged $10/month for unlimited evening and weekend minutes. There must be some kind of error, I already have that in my plan.
M: Well I see here it is included in your plan, the $10 option appears it was for an older plan that didn't include it. I show it's been billing since you changed plans in September of 2006. $10 a month over 14 months would be $140 you've been billed for something you already had.
SC: I can't believe I didn't notice it until now. We need to fix this right away.
Typically for billing errors we go back only 60 days, but I see in the account the customer is one of our more valued ones, so my sup allows me go back SEVEN months and credit $70, I explain this to him.)
SC: Excuse me? Only $70? Oh no no no, I want the whole $140. This is YOUR responsibility, you guys screwed up, you were the ones who made the mistake, you should be the ones who fix it!
M: Well sir, I do understand an error was made when setting up your plan, but it is YOUR responsibility to be checking your bills regularly and contacting us in a timely manner about any errors. It's not our fault it went unnoticed for so long.
SC: I am NOT accepting $70. This was YOUR error! I will not pay for something you guys messed up. I'm the customer, I come FIRST! I want my $140. NOW.
M: Sir, our usual policy is to only go back 60 days, we are going back over THREE times that much for you in this case.
SC: Maybe you didn't hear me. I WANT my $140.
Ok, so he didn't ask directly for a sup, but my sup approved the $70 and this guy wanted more so I didn't know what to do. I escalated it and the sup just told him what I did, that it was his job to check his bills regularly and he wasn't going to get his $140.
This guy pissed me off. How the hell is it OUR fault that you missed an apparent error on your bill for OVER A YEAR?? If you bought something at wal-mart and tried to return it 14 months later because of a defect you just noticed, they'd laugh you out of the place.
Lawyer, Ho!
Gotta love this acct note I came across:
CUST CALLED IN VERY UPSET ABOUT BILLING AND USAGE CHARGES. EDU CUST THOSE ARE VALID CHARGES AND NO CREDIT IS DUE. USED FOUL LANGUAGE AND AGAIN DEMANDED HIS CREDIT. APPARENTLY HAS BEEN HAVING SERVICE PROBLEMS WITH US, THREATENED TO SUE ME IF I HUNG UP ON HIM, THEN DEMANDED TO SPEAK TO SUP, THEN THREATENED TO SUE SUP IF HE DIDN'T GET CREDIT
Suing someone for hanging up on you? Yeah I'd like to see the lawyer who would take that case! Why do customers think a legal threat will IMMEDIATELY make us bow to their wishes?? You would think someone would clue them in that saying they'll talk to a lawyer about it usually won't prompty much of a response.
Say my name, Say my name
This guy was nice enough, but I'll labe him AC for annoying customer, you'll find out in a moment.
M: My name is Steve, how can I help you?
AC: Well Steve, I need to activate a phone.
M: Ok, well I'll need the serial number first, the ESN
AC: Ok Steve, is that on the back of the phone Steve?
M: Yes, underneath the battery.
AC: Sure Steve, I'll just take out the battery. Ok I have the number Steve, it's XXXXXXXXXXX. Did you get that Steve?
M: Yes, now I'll need you to enter the following code into the phone.
AC: Sure Steve, what's the code.
Ok so you get the point, he must've slipped my name in to EVERY SENTENCE he spoke, often more than once. He was a very nice guy, but saying my name over and over really got on my nerves.
Temporary Credit, permanent stupidity
SC: I paid my balance last week of $173 and now you are saying I owe you another $229, what's going on here? That was supposed to be permanent.
M: Ok well I see you were given a temporary credit to restore your service since we were waiting on a phone to be returned. Then a couple of days later, you were given the permanent credit for the phone when we recieved it. You made your payment, then the temporary credit of $229 reversed on to the account.
SC: The $229 was supposed to be permanent, I called to pay my bill and was told my balance was $173, so that's what I paid.
M: You DID get the permanent credit sir.
SC: Evidently I did not because that 229 is back on my account.
M: Ok,let's go over this again. Your account balance was $600 and a bit. There were TWO credits done for 229. One temporary, one permanent. When you called in to pay your balance, BOTH of those credits were still in effect, which is why you were told 173 was your balance. Several days later, the 229 reversed on to your account so your balance reflected the $600 and a bit minus the SINGLE permanent credit you were given for the phone.
SC: Look I called, you told me to pay 173 so I did. I ain't paying a penny more.
M: Whether or not you pay is your choice sir, but if you don't pay your service will be shut off and eventually your account will be cancelled.
SC: I PAID what you told me to PAY. I am NOT paying you any more do you understand me?
M: I do sir, but regardless of if you pay or not, the $229 is a valid charge and will stay on the acct. I did speak to my supervisor about this and she said there is no credit due on the account as the $229 was, as I have told you, a TEMPORARY credit.
SC: Fine, I'm cancelling this whole damn account...and I ain't paying one cent of that $229 , I'll speak to a lawyer if I have to.
M: Very well sir, I will transfer you to cancellations.
I truly wish your lack of intelligence was only a temporary condition but I regret it's obviously of the permanent, debilitating variety. I can only hope to never ever run into you again or else lose even more of my precious brain cells trying to explain a simple concept to you.
Unfortunately cancellations did credit this guy $50 on his totally valid charges, but I guess it was worth it to keep him with us?
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