A few short delivery stories

[HappyFun Ball]

Most of my work experience has been in the food industry..

I deliver food alot, my jobs have varied from pizzas to steak dinners



Me: Thank you for calling blah-blah pizza, this is Rose, how can I help you?

SC: I'd like to place a delivery

Me: May I have your phone number?

SC: 123-4567

I type in the number, if she has ordered from us before, her address and order history will show up. It shows up an address for a neighboring town that is waaay outside of out area, for a very. very short time we did deliver there, but stopped as it was just too far away.

Me: Is your address 123 Idiot Ave?

SC: Yes

Me: I'm sorry ma'am but that is out of our area

SC: No, it's not

Me: I'm afraid it is

SC: I've had pizza delivered here before

Me: Yes ma'am, but we had to stop going to that area as is was too far out

SC: So how am I suppose to get my pizza?

Me: You can come pick it up

SC: No, that's ridiculous.. I want to speak to a manager

I listen to the manager/SC conversation , the manager tells her the same thing, it's takes 20 minutes just to get out there, after about 10 minutes the manager says "Well, if you want McDonalds, do they bring you the food? No, you have to go get it."

______________________________________


Me: Thank you for calling blah blah pizza, this is Rose how can I help you?

SC: You ya'll have hamburgers?

Me: No sir we don't

SC: Hot dogs?

ME: No sir, we have pizza, bread sticks, cheese sticks and buffalo wings.

SC: Is that all?

ME: Yes

SC: Can you go by Taco Bell and bring me something?

Me: Are you going to order a pizza too?

Sometimes, if the customer is nice and they have someone there who doesn't want pizza, I'll whip through a fast food joint and get them something.

SC: No, I don't want any pizza

Me: Then I can not bring you anything else

SC: Why not?

Me: Because this is blah blah pizza, not Mc Donalds.

SC: But I don't want pizza

Me: I'm sorry, but I can't bring you anything else

SC: I don't have a car and I can't go and get anything else

Me: I'm sorry, but that's not my problem

SC; Let me speak to a driver

Me:You are speaking to a driver

SC: I want a different driver then

Me: A different one will tell you the same thing

SC: But I don't want pizza and I don't have a car

This went on for 15 minutes, he kept talking in circles

Me: Sir.. Are you going to order a pizza or argue?

SC: Argue.. You should be able to bring me whatever I want

Me: Call back when you are ready to order a pizza (click)

_______________________________________________

Me: Thank you for calling blah blah pizza, this is Rose how can I help you?

SC: I need a delivery and I need it here in 10 minutes

This is Friday night at 6 PM.. I have 5 deliveries stacked up and am waiting on one more to come out of the oven.

Me: Our delivery time is 45 minutes to an hour

SC: That's ridiculous!

The dreaded "R" word

SC: Can't you put my order first?

Me: No sir.. It's not fair to the others and even if I did it takes 10 minutes just to make and cook the pizza another 5-10 minutes to get it there.

SC: Ok, lets do that

Me: I'm sorry, but I can't.. If you want a delivery, it'll be there in 45 minutes to an hours.

SC: I'll just call another place, I bet they will do it.

Me: I highly doubt it, but your free to try.


__________________________________

I was working at a steak delivery place, this was Saturday night and while I was waiting of food to get cooked, I answered the phone

Me: *Que phone greeting*

SC: I want to know where my food is, my kids are hungry

Me: Alright, give me a second and I'll check

I punch it up on the computer.. He had ordered about 10 minutes ago and his food hasn't even made it to the grill.

Me: Sir, you just ordered 10 minutes ago. I'm sure you were informed that it's about an hour for delivery.

SC: My kids are hungry

Me: Your food will be there in about 45 minutes.

SC: My kids are hungry

Me: I'm sure they are.. But there is nothing I can do about it.

SC: They need to eat

Me: We all need to eat

SC: Well my kids are hungry

Me: So you've told me.. But it's Saturday night and we are busy so it takes a little bit.

SC: My kids are hungry

Me: I don't know what you want me to do about it.. On Friday and Saturday nights it's best to order dinner before you get too hungry.

SC: An hour is too long.. I could go to Mc Donalds and get it in less than 15 minutes.

Me: If you'd like to do that I can cancel your order.

SC: But my kids are hungry

By now I'm wondering if he isn't a parrot who has been trained a few lines.. Or if he thinks repeating the same line there any faster, I also noticed that he has ordered 1 Ribeye dinner.. Just 1, no kids meals, no mutiple dinners.

Me: All I can tell you is to give them a little something to tide them over for now.. I can't do anything to speed the delivery up.

He finally gets the hint and hangs up.

______________________________________

I delivered to a hotel, to the desk clerk.. Now as anyone would know.. If you're delivering pizzas, you're not rich, in fact most of my co workers, it was there 2nd job.. There seemed to be an epidemic of men who loved to have unprotected sex but hated the consequences that arose (babies) and they had to work a 2nd job to A. Support kids B. Get away from the kids and wife. I take the pizza to the clerk, waddle more like it as I was 8 months pregnant, the total was 9.49$ and she hands me a 10$.. "I'm just a poor hotel worker." she said, "I'm just a poor delivery driver." I replied "But I always give at least 3$ when I order anything."


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There was a big storm that whipped through the city I worked at, just one of those short, severe storms that knocked down trees, power lines ect.. The power was knocked out, most of the staff was sent home, but I stayed for a bit in case the power came back on. The phones rang as they do when it rains.. People don't want to go out and get food.

Me:*same first line as before*

SC: I'd like to place an order

Me: I'm sorry, we are closed right now, we have no power.

SC: So?

Me: We can't cook pizzas or anything, the stove is electric.

SC: Bring it to me uncooked and I'll cook it

Me: I can't.. It against health department regulations

SC: Ugh.. I can't believe how un helpful you're being. Look, all I want is a pizza.

Me: I can take down you name and order and we can deliver it when the power comes back on.. But I don't know when that will be

SC: Thanks for nothing!

[Sliceanddice]

i could never deliver pizza... i would be come a seriel killer

[cinema guy]

I can't believe the nerve of some people, to ask a pizza delivery driver to pick up Taco Bell!

[donruss]

As to the 1st story, I cannot tell you how many times we have had people call from out of the area and insist that we deliver to them. I even tell them that not only is it another store in the chain, I can give them the phone number to call them so they don't have to look it up and they insist we deliver it and that "We have always gone there". I then proceed to tell them that I have worked at my store for 14 years as a delivery driver and they still treat me like I don't know the area or like a moron in general.

As to the 2nd story, when I worked at a regional pizza place back in my high school days, around 20 years ago, we had people all the time call in for their pizza and expect us to pick up milk, cigs, and beer for them and they would "Take care of the driver". After them not only not stiffing the driver and some of them not having the funds to cover said extra items, the drivers put an end to that real quick.

People, I won't meet you at the corner store and I definitely will not do your grocery shopping for you. I don't mind doing something nice and pick up something for a long time customer that has always treated me well and I know will take care of me but those customers don't ask me to do those things.

[Auto]

Damn, Rose, you're too much of a doormat with those bastards. Stop being so nice.

When I had your job, I explained things once (maybe twice if I thought they genuinely didn't understand). Then I hung up. No going around and around where I'm repeating myself answering the SC's same moronic question over and over.

The store was too busy to allow one jerk to waste my time when I could see other calls coming in. Hanging up just meant putting the jerk on hold to answer the next call. That got rid of most of them. If they were still holding, I'd just hang them up. Sometimes they'd call back and want to continue their whining. I'd tell them I explained things once and didn't have time to do it again. Then I hang up.

Luckily, I had a manager who was even more impatient than I was when it came to customers who either weren't going to order or who wanted to be treated in a way that caused us to lose money on their order because it was so time and labor intensive to fill.

As for drivers running errands for customers, that's a big no-no. Mainly because it makes deliveries take forever. Meaning the store has to schedule extra drivers. If someone ever called to ask a driver to go to Taco Bell or McD's for him, I'd just hang up. No arguing, no explaining, no nothing. Just say No and then their line goes dead.

[Racket_Man]

i could never deliver pizza... i would be come a seriel killer

some nights I am VERY GLAD that I do not own an AK-47 with a back seat full of ammo.

one of these days I am going to post my rules of delivery start to finish from the phone ringing to when I get back to the store to after close.

[Sylvia727]

At my old pizzeria, we had delivery fees of $2 for orders under $50 and $5 per $50. So if you ordered $150 worth of food we tacked $15 on as a delivery fee. The delivery fee went straight to the driver. I couldn't believe how many people tried to use it as an excuse for stiffing him on the tip. One lady called my co-irker and was ranting about $2 was more than enough. I pulled up her order; $45, only 5 away from getting upped to $5. Co-irker finally told her it paid for his gas and he still needed a 20% tip. If he didn't get a 20% tip she would put a note on the account not to deliver there without the tip on the credit card. I disliked that woman horribly but she did stand up for the drivers.

[Boozy]

Damn, Rose, you're too much of a doormat with those bastards. Stop being so nice.

I think her stories point towards her being both assertive yet kind.

There's no harm in being polite when you're telling people that they are idiots.

[HappyFun Ball]

I think her stories point towards her being both assertive yet kind.

There's no harm in being polite when you're telling people that they are idiots.

If I was a doormat, I would've done what the SC's wanted..

[Auto]

If I was a doormat, I would've done what the SC's wanted..

point taken.

but i would not have reasoned with them for as long as you did.

i'm just not that patient and my shifts were too busy for me to get tied up arguing with some meathead about something we're simply not going to do for him. i've said what there is to say. anything more is just repeating myself.

kinda like arguing with a 5 year old -- "but why can't i stay up? give me one good reason" -- when both of you just keep saying the same things over and over.

at some point, you've just got to hang up on them.

with me, that point comes very quickly.

that's what i meant about not being a doormat. stop wasting time arguing with someone who just won't understand.

[Boozy]

at some point, you've just got to hang up on them.

True. Some people have more patience than others. I guess I'm sort of in between.

[HappyFun Ball]

Or you be like me and enjoy arguing.. Haha.. It's weird but I do..

I watched a Monty Python bit called "The Argument Sketch".. That's a job I could do.

[ArenaBoy]

I watched a Monty Python bit called "The Argument Sketch".. That's a job I could do.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=y05EmK66Gsk One of my favorite sketches in MP.

[MadonnaC]

Me: I'm sorry ma'am but that is out of our area

Sounds like our company took care of the drivers from our favorite place. They closed down because they didn't get enough business, but they made arrangements for us to be serviced by the next closest......

[derangedperson]

http://youtube.com/watch?v=y05EmK66Gsk One of my favorite sketches in MP.

It's one of my faves as well, you vacuous, toffy-nosed, malodorous PERVERT!