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The mere fact that this day even happened is almost annoying.
The Measuring Fool
By pure accident I found myself in the pets dept. of my store through the course of my shift. A man walks up to me with some kind of pet bed we have this exchange.
Him: Can you tell me how big this thing is?
Me, the BDH: About two feet by a foot or so.
Him: But you don't know for sure?
Me: I'm pretty sure.
Him: Well, I need to know exactly how big this thing is.
Me: *Almost annoyed* Well let's go to hardware and get a tape measure. (Hardware is on the other side fo the store)
Him: Nevermind, I'll come back later and check it.
Theme of the day, apparently.
The money stealing machine is actually a tag maker for collars and wannabe military people. After spending fifteen minutes with the tech, who finally came out to service the thing, I now know the inner workings of the machine and all it's fundamental secrets.
A lady walks up and begins to study the blank example pieces that are on the case. She motions for me to come over and asks me how big the bone shaped tag is. I reply that it's about an inch to an inch and a quarter. My near approximate guesstimate wasn't good enough. She wanted to know to the centimeter how big it was. I snorted and told her that "it's not worth my time to indulge your pettiness." And to "buy the thing, or don't."
Now, here's a secret for you. The machine ONLY recognizes ones and fives and will spit out anything higher. It's programming CAN NOT ACCEPT anything higher than a one or a five.
Her: Sir, I put twenty dollars in this thing and it's not giving me my change.
Me: Ma'am, with all due respect, no you didn't. It only accepts singles and fives. If you put twenty bucks worth of fives in there, then it should print up a voucher for you to claim your change at customer service, but the most expensive tag in there is only six bucks.
Her: Are you calling me a liar?
Me: If you put a twenty in there, then yeah. If you put twenty in ones and fives, then no.
Her: So what are you saying then?
Me: That you're either seriously lacking in common mathematics, or you're trying to scam us.
Her: Young man, I believe that the Lord punishes liars and deceivers. And I don't expect anything to happen to me because I haven't done either of those things.
Me: Believe what you will, ma'am. Now if you'll excuse me, I have other matters to attend to, good day.
Her: *begins to say something*
Me: I said "good day".
I wish I was that awesome.
There's a girl that works in our store who apparently has some sort of "me" complex. Everything is about her. We don't talk to her when we walk by or see her, we're pissed off at her about something. We say something rude, she hears it from twenty feet away and assumes we're talking about her.
Lately, all of that has been true. She does as little as possible, hides in the backroom when her boss leaves and, to use the phrase, makes a meal out of the simplest chore. She stocks carts for everyone ELSE in her dept. to stock out and piles so much crap on them that it's nearly impossible to get them moving, or stop them quickly. On top of that, she changes her schedule. She apparently refuses any alteration in her hours or days off. If she's schedules 9-6 on Saturday and off on Tuesday, she changes herself to off on Saturday and 7-4 on Tuesday.
She wastes no time clocking out, yet she's seen around the store several hours after her shift has ended. I've heard her talk about people behind their back, but she gets butthurt when someone says anything about her to management or otherwise.
*shrugs* Takes all kinds...
The Measuring Fool
By pure accident I found myself in the pets dept. of my store through the course of my shift. A man walks up to me with some kind of pet bed we have this exchange.
Him: Can you tell me how big this thing is?
Me, the BDH: About two feet by a foot or so.
Him: But you don't know for sure?
Me: I'm pretty sure.
Him: Well, I need to know exactly how big this thing is.
Me: *Almost annoyed* Well let's go to hardware and get a tape measure. (Hardware is on the other side fo the store)
Him: Nevermind, I'll come back later and check it.
Theme of the day, apparently.
The money stealing machine is actually a tag maker for collars and wannabe military people. After spending fifteen minutes with the tech, who finally came out to service the thing, I now know the inner workings of the machine and all it's fundamental secrets.
A lady walks up and begins to study the blank example pieces that are on the case. She motions for me to come over and asks me how big the bone shaped tag is. I reply that it's about an inch to an inch and a quarter. My near approximate guesstimate wasn't good enough. She wanted to know to the centimeter how big it was. I snorted and told her that "it's not worth my time to indulge your pettiness." And to "buy the thing, or don't."
Now, here's a secret for you. The machine ONLY recognizes ones and fives and will spit out anything higher. It's programming CAN NOT ACCEPT anything higher than a one or a five.
Her: Sir, I put twenty dollars in this thing and it's not giving me my change.
Me: Ma'am, with all due respect, no you didn't. It only accepts singles and fives. If you put twenty bucks worth of fives in there, then it should print up a voucher for you to claim your change at customer service, but the most expensive tag in there is only six bucks.
Her: Are you calling me a liar?
Me: If you put a twenty in there, then yeah. If you put twenty in ones and fives, then no.
Her: So what are you saying then?
Me: That you're either seriously lacking in common mathematics, or you're trying to scam us.
Her: Young man, I believe that the Lord punishes liars and deceivers. And I don't expect anything to happen to me because I haven't done either of those things.
Me: Believe what you will, ma'am. Now if you'll excuse me, I have other matters to attend to, good day.
Her: *begins to say something*
Me: I said "good day".
I wish I was that awesome.
There's a girl that works in our store who apparently has some sort of "me" complex. Everything is about her. We don't talk to her when we walk by or see her, we're pissed off at her about something. We say something rude, she hears it from twenty feet away and assumes we're talking about her.
Lately, all of that has been true. She does as little as possible, hides in the backroom when her boss leaves and, to use the phrase, makes a meal out of the simplest chore. She stocks carts for everyone ELSE in her dept. to stock out and piles so much crap on them that it's nearly impossible to get them moving, or stop them quickly. On top of that, she changes her schedule. She apparently refuses any alteration in her hours or days off. If she's schedules 9-6 on Saturday and off on Tuesday, she changes herself to off on Saturday and 7-4 on Tuesday.
She wastes no time clocking out, yet she's seen around the store several hours after her shift has ended. I've heard her talk about people behind their back, but she gets butthurt when someone says anything about her to management or otherwise.
*shrugs* Takes all kinds...
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